Survivors of toxic relationship with a Narcissist: Let's Connect

@hopeful33250 yes I am going to seek help
Thank you

@sheila1960 Do you have access to YouTube? If so, please look up Dr. Ramani. I understand not having money and I applaud you for your strength and resilience in dealing with the abuse of a narcissist. I found Dr. Ramani several years ago. My father was diagnosed with narcissitic personality disorder and after I got sober 8 years ago, I found myself in a relationship (not sexual) with a person who turned out to be narcissistic. This person blew my world apart as they were also in recovery and I was desperate to remain sober. Dr. Ramani's videos helped me understand not only narcissism but also how to deal with what remained of me. I hope this helps. Hang in there. You have taken a huge step and I applaud your strength.

@diverdown1 I do have access to YouTube and I will look her up. I have set up counseling. I have put a restraining order on him. I’m his second wife so now both wives have put a restraining order on him. I’m trying to prepare myself for how he’s going to proceed during the divorce. I am praying that the judges will see through his lives and deception and evil do judges, even consider narcissist abuse. I don’t know I’ve never been through this.

She talks about lawyers and court in a video. Be sure and let your lawyer know you believe he is a narcissist. I applaud you for doing all this. I know it is brutal. I watched my mom go through it. Hang in there. Let me know if I can help.

I would like to just talk to other members who are dealing with a narcissist partner. I am not intending to leave him. Too late in life for that
I just would like the community support.

I am one of those people. 71 year old lady here. Been married for 44 years. I don't want to leave him and have hung on knowing that he is a narcissist for 2 years now. Some times do come that I can't stand him any longer and I am ready to leave him and then it gets better. Always a struggle and a roller coaster ride for sure. It takes it toll on you after awhile but I seem to always persevere. How about you?

Often what is going on within someone narcissistic is much worse than it feels on our side. Step back and pray for their healing works nicely but can enable their behaviors to become an every day part of life that has no boundaries, lacks responsibility for the hurt they cause ( it’s our fault?) and we are living in an environment that is at least emotionally unsafe. I wish we could love that trait out of others but, for 19 years, I enabled instead.

@sheila1960 It has been a while since you last posted, and I was wondering how you are doing. Could you post an update when it's convenient?

Hello @dublin2019, and welcome to Mayo Connect. I'm glad you found this forum and are looking for support. Share a little about your situation as you would like. For example, what do you do for yourself to keep yourself safe and happy? Do you have a personal support system within your family or among your friends?

Hello,
Yes I have friends to support me.
My husband is a narcissist . I have sought out professional advice and described my situation
They stated he is malignant.
Also, I recently have been dx with Invasive breast cancer. He has suddenly become "normal", caring and non manipulative. We are both going to separate therapists. He said the 6 weeks he has gone has really helped him and he wants to be t better person.
In addition, I was so stressed out about us not talking for 3 months and my BC dz that I told my two adult children some of the experiences I've had with him. They turned against me like I was single handedly the sole perpetrator in this situation. They are 38, 34 2 males that live 1 mile from me and have their own place.
Our family life has been stellar because I never told them what I was expert. I had reached my limit with a number of unexplainable situations that sent me into extreme anxiety.
I am 72 female and have been married to this man for 42 years.
Please t
Joyce