How do you respond when your spouse keeps asking where her mother is?

@tracidw
My husband keeps asking me about his brother who died in 1981. I keep telling him that he died. Then he’ll ask when and the remembers it was an accident. Not sure if telling him something different would help. He doesn’t remember his sisters. One told me that he thinks she is me.

@wmehan
Maybe you could try and see what he'll say if you mention that you'll find out. I figured when my mom asked me how her dog was doing, that she forgot I told her she died. So that's why I finally just said the dog was ok.

My mom now doesn't remember the past 30 years - 2nd husband or living in another state for 15 years. Evidently, this is normal in the later stages (at least for LBD).

It's a tough situation, for sure. Hope your husband finds a different focus.

Hi,
My Mother has dementia and I am an only child. My Father died when I was a child. I am very involved in Mum's care.
I have had to become an actress at times. Her older sisters and brother have died but I just go along with the flow whenever she remembers them and asks questions. I would not tell her the truth because she'd then be in shock and her anxiety would shoot up. If she continued asking the same question I'd distract her then talk about a different topic.

We used to tell my husband’s grandmother that her deceased husband had run to the store and how about a cup of tea while we wait for him to get back. . Her working memory was so brief it worked time after time.