Anyone Else With PTSD?

Posted by Parus @parus, Jul 21, 2017

Curious

@peach414144

hello i am back again. it seems that i at age 80 who has ptsd, bipolar and other mental and physical problems have come to realize a few important facts. the ptsd will never stop. till the day you die so remember helping others does help you to help yourself. also, as bad as the ptsd is it is somewhat lesser in pain than before AS YOU AGE. to me it seems THERE IS A GREAT LONELINESS WITH PTSD. only another person with ptsd can truly understand the agonies. THERE IS A GREAT NEED TO SHARE BUT THIS CAN REALLY ONLY BE DONE WITH ANOTHER PTSD PERSON. THERE NEEDS TO BE GROUP MEETINGS WITH PTSD PEO[LE. BUT THERE IS TO MY KNOWLEDGE ONLY A ONE PERCENT CHANCE OF FINDING ONE . I WAS LUCKY ENOUGH TO BE IN ONE FOR A WHILE. IT DOES HELP GREATLY.
THERE IS NO EMBARASMENT WHEN YOU SHARE THE SAME SO YOU OPEN UP WITH EASE. IT DOES HELP, IT DOES. OUR GOVERNMENT SHOULD HELP US TO HAVE THESE MEETINGS WITH ACCREDITED PEOPLE. IT DOES HELP THE PAIN WHEN YOU TALK ABOUT IT WITH OTHERS OF THE SAME KIND.

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Hi, Barb @peach414144 – I understand. It would be a challenge to make it work. I know that there used to be an ongoing depression group in the hospital that’s an hour away. The same hospital took over my local hospital, so maybe there’s hope that they’ll start one here. NAMI couldn’t get enough signed up for one group I looked at here.

Any chance your hospital would sponsor a group?

Jim

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@peach414144

hello i am back again. it seems that i at age 80 who has ptsd, bipolar and other mental and physical problems have come to realize a few important facts. the ptsd will never stop. till the day you die so remember helping others does help you to help yourself. also, as bad as the ptsd is it is somewhat lesser in pain than before AS YOU AGE. to me it seems THERE IS A GREAT LONELINESS WITH PTSD. only another person with ptsd can truly understand the agonies. THERE IS A GREAT NEED TO SHARE BUT THIS CAN REALLY ONLY BE DONE WITH ANOTHER PTSD PERSON. THERE NEEDS TO BE GROUP MEETINGS WITH PTSD PEO[LE. BUT THERE IS TO MY KNOWLEDGE ONLY A ONE PERCENT CHANCE OF FINDING ONE . I WAS LUCKY ENOUGH TO BE IN ONE FOR A WHILE. IT DOES HELP GREATLY.
THERE IS NO EMBARASMENT WHEN YOU SHARE THE SAME SO YOU OPEN UP WITH EASE. IT DOES HELP, IT DOES. OUR GOVERNMENT SHOULD HELP US TO HAVE THESE MEETINGS WITH ACCREDITED PEOPLE. IT DOES HELP THE PAIN WHEN YOU TALK ABOUT IT WITH OTHERS OF THE SAME KIND.

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your suggestion of the hospitals sponsoring a group is a very good one. the nami here is overloaded. this area is pretty much backwards. whomever is holding this area in a tight grip is beyond me. one instance: an eye injury sent me to the hospital. i was refused treatment because they do not have any opthamalogist on staff for emergencies. i had to wait over the weekend and then to call my doctor who said he will see me in two weeks. it is a disgrace how the people are (not) treated. the united way allows nami to meet there but there are so many people in need and not enough help i still at age 80 do volunteer for the city. DO NOT GIVE UP. BE STUBBORN. and turn on the music.

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@parus

I have got to get myself back on track..I am the only one that can do so. The depression is taking over and I don’t want to be around anyone. I cannot find my smiley face for now. This time of the year nearly always catches off guard…42 years ago on 10/26 my dad blew his brains out. I do not fault him for doing so as…no wonder my mental status is at the bottom of the vortex. I am being melodramatic…that was a long time ago. He was always the happy face and everyone loved him. He never appeared sad and helped others so much. Anyway, bummed…Every time I leave home I get scared. Dumb, so dumb to allow PTSD do this so severely.
Thanks as it helps some to come here…Be assured I am not as pathetic as my words express. I am strong…

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Hi, @parus–sounds like yesterday was a really tough day. Doesn’t seem melodramatic or surprising at all that you would feel depressed this time of year around the anniversary of your dad’s death. He was your dad …that’s incredibly hard.

How are you doing today?

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@parus

I have got to get myself back on track..I am the only one that can do so. The depression is taking over and I don’t want to be around anyone. I cannot find my smiley face for now. This time of the year nearly always catches off guard…42 years ago on 10/26 my dad blew his brains out. I do not fault him for doing so as…no wonder my mental status is at the bottom of the vortex. I am being melodramatic…that was a long time ago. He was always the happy face and everyone loved him. He never appeared sad and helped others so much. Anyway, bummed…Every time I leave home I get scared. Dumb, so dumb to allow PTSD do this so severely.
Thanks as it helps some to come here…Be assured I am not as pathetic as my words express. I am strong…

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@lisalucier Hello and thank you for asking. I am doing better today. He was my dad and mostly he taught me integrity. Also about growing green and growing things. Low of 37 here tonight so all house plants are now in for the winter, perennials are tucked in and annuals have been removed. Added bonus is that the houseplants help filter toxins out of the air and add life and ambiance in my home.

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@parus

I have got to get myself back on track..I am the only one that can do so. The depression is taking over and I don’t want to be around anyone. I cannot find my smiley face for now. This time of the year nearly always catches off guard…42 years ago on 10/26 my dad blew his brains out. I do not fault him for doing so as…no wonder my mental status is at the bottom of the vortex. I am being melodramatic…that was a long time ago. He was always the happy face and everyone loved him. He never appeared sad and helped others so much. Anyway, bummed…Every time I leave home I get scared. Dumb, so dumb to allow PTSD do this so severely.
Thanks as it helps some to come here…Be assured I am not as pathetic as my words express. I am strong…

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Hi, @parus–I am glad to hear you are doing better today.

Sounds like your dad taught you some valuable things. Integrity is key to learn from your parents. My husband and I are still working on teaching integrity and its value to our young sons, ages 9 and 10.

Interesting about the house plants. l think that a discussion about nature and its role in mental health might be worthwhile here on Connect.

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Awful day and decisions to make. I can’t make a decision. Back to PCP tomorrow and after last visit I am terrified of returning. Panic attacks, jumping at every little sound, Heart racing, taking bp med as directed, this is dumb to be so afaraid i am not thinking clear thoughts. focus

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@parus

Awful day and decisions to make. I can’t make a decision. Back to PCP tomorrow and after last visit I am terrified of returning. Panic attacks, jumping at every little sound, Heart racing, taking bp med as directed, this is dumb to be so afaraid i am not thinking clear thoughts. focus

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@parus

I’m sorry to hear that you anticipation of tomorrow’s appointment is causing so much anxiety, but it is certainly understandable!

I’ll be thinking about you tomorrow. Let us know how it goes for you – maybe they will be better organized and more efficient 🙂

Teresa

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@parus

Awful day and decisions to make. I can’t make a decision. Back to PCP tomorrow and after last visit I am terrified of returning. Panic attacks, jumping at every little sound, Heart racing, taking bp med as directed, this is dumb to be so afaraid i am not thinking clear thoughts. focus

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Agree with @hopeful33250, @parus. So sorry today is awful and you are feeling panic. Please do keep us posted.

Is there anything you might do for a little self-care today?

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@parus

Awful day and decisions to make. I can’t make a decision. Back to PCP tomorrow and after last visit I am terrified of returning. Panic attacks, jumping at every little sound, Heart racing, taking bp med as directed, this is dumb to be so afaraid i am not thinking clear thoughts. focus

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i hear you @parus. am pulling for you. we care for you. there is something about this time of the year as i am feeling the ptsd depression sadness quite a bit this month so we know you are not alone.

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@parus

My only concern with this type of group would be whether or not there would be an adequate/appropriate moderator. This could become one huge disaster w/o qualified leaders. A thought.

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you are right parus. qualified leaders are scarce and usually have similar health problems.

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Well, my appointment was just canceled as the doc could not make it in…Now I can spaz all weekend until Monday afternoon. I am required to give 24 hour notice so they can fill my time slot. Not a happy camper as I wanted to get it over with and ask why my ankles are swelling more…a plot to destroy old, worthless people that are nothing more than a burden on society. I would much rather be working and also would like for my heart to quit pounding so hard. There was a time I did learn to trust and was badly abused asking for help. Not into self pity here just terribly frustrated and trying to get a lid on my anger. Thing calm thoughts. Interstate traffic is terrible as to work on the road for widening to 4 lanes and who cares about this…semi’s shifting gears, no need to try music as would have to turn volume so loud to drown out noise of interstate. Pain is through the roof and it is my own fault for allowing something so seemingly insignificant upset me this much!!!! Noise everywhere. Want it to stop. At least have a little focus. Work on a watercolor with the roaring of traffic. Trapped here…don’t dare leave and go any where in this kind of shape. It is all in my head…

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Oh my, @parus

I was so hoping that you would have a good appointment and a better day today! I’m glad that you can get in to see the doctor on Monday, though. This will give you an opportunity to get your questions answered – I must admit being able to do it before the weekend would have been better, though.

Keep focused on what you can do to get yourself through the weekend – we are “in your corner” and hoping for the best for you.

Teresa

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@parus

Well, my appointment was just canceled as the doc could not make it in…Now I can spaz all weekend until Monday afternoon. I am required to give 24 hour notice so they can fill my time slot. Not a happy camper as I wanted to get it over with and ask why my ankles are swelling more…a plot to destroy old, worthless people that are nothing more than a burden on society. I would much rather be working and also would like for my heart to quit pounding so hard. There was a time I did learn to trust and was badly abused asking for help. Not into self pity here just terribly frustrated and trying to get a lid on my anger. Thing calm thoughts. Interstate traffic is terrible as to work on the road for widening to 4 lanes and who cares about this…semi’s shifting gears, no need to try music as would have to turn volume so loud to drown out noise of interstate. Pain is through the roof and it is my own fault for allowing something so seemingly insignificant upset me this much!!!! Noise everywhere. Want it to stop. At least have a little focus. Work on a watercolor with the roaring of traffic. Trapped here…don’t dare leave and go any where in this kind of shape. It is all in my head…

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Oh, @parus, I’m so sorry to hear that. How frustrating.

How are you hanging in there?

Are you truly working on a watercolor, then?

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Return visit to doctor resulted in a trip to imaging as to who knows what? Scary as I had them before. Tomorrow at 2. What next? Back in a week for results and a different doctor as the one I am seeing is leaving for Haiti. The one seen prior to the assigned doctor freaked me out so much with her uncertainty-not her again!!! We ought to be able to feel safe and confident when seeing the secondary to the pcp. Stressed to the max. No one to ask for help. Suck it up coward and just go get it over with…the noise is dreadful for me. i know for most this is no problem. My vision goes to black and white—I can do this.

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@parus–so sorry this is feeling scary and stressful and that you are not getting to stay with one provider. You are correct that you should be able to feel safe and confident with any doctor appointment–that’s important.

You absolutely can do this, @parus. You have shown us your strength in many ways.

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