Down in the dumps again – challenges with adult children

It’s so hard in some states to get approved for SSN disability. Even very disabled people sometimes don’t get approved. It’s very difficult. Seems like the SSN administration try to NOT approve. They seem to find loopholes to not approve. Even when we are very disabled. I say don’t give up. Get a lawyer too. They truly do help in Disability cases. It’s a shame when disabled folks like us who truly are disabled don’t get approved. Sometimes it takes 2-3 times to resubmit. Take good care.

Thanks for your post. I also don’t think it’s asking too much for a thank you and a how are you doing. I’ve never turned down requests for help from our kids and they’ve “borrowed” many thousands of dollars with no payback as promised. But this New Year my husband are going to start doing for us. While our kids were out going to dinner, taking trips we sat at home because we’ve exhausted our savings helping them. They are 32 and 34 and we’re done with bailing them out. We love them more than anything but it’s time. Of course if it’s a dire situation we will try to help.

Today started out bad but read your letter and am going to PUSH FORWARD. Didn't help weather was so dreary.

My parents had my grandfather stay with them for three months and then had him go to his daughter's about an hour away. I wish more younger ones thought about having parents stay with them if they were alone. Just too old in my thinking.

I’m seriously thinking about going off Cymbalta as I don’t like how I feel. I’m on disability but it took me 3.5 years. I finally hired an atty after getting denied. In NC you don’t pay the atty anything until you get approved and then they get a percentage of your back pay. It wasn’t that much. To me well worth it.

Waiting for delivery of my light at any time. Use to have horrible big clumsy one - gave it away but looked at some on line and the reviews. We don't get sun in MI.

@merpreb This has been an interesting discussion. First, I have no kids. Never wanted them. I have been married since last April to a man with 2 grown kids, now 39 and 34. I haven't had the experience of raising kids nor dealing with the issues you all I have spoken of. I do see my step children, 2 complete opposite personalities. One is loving and in contact regularly, even though he lives 800 miles away and is a long haul trucker. He will often route through here to stop for dinner or take his 30 hours down when possible. The other lives 30 miles away and we go months with no contact, no call/text/email.
Ginger

I don't give my kids the power to determine my happiness. I determine my happiness. 4 daughters, 38,39,42 and 45 with families and kids. If I want to call them I call them and we always have a pleasant conversation. I do most of the calling, which is fine by me. One granddaughter acknowledges her presents but other ones don't until I see them. I don't live close to them so that is 2-3 times a year that I see them. I always feel welcome in their home and have a room for me and nice time when I visit. I am 71 and the oldest in the family. Yes, I just bought my own tombstone and sent them pictures of it. LOL. I am happy with the life I have and that gives me great joy and satisfaction. If I expect other people to do what I want or for others to "make me happy", never will happen.
GF has 3 daughters with only one talking to her, because of some issues 20-30 years ago. She reaches out to them and is ignored. Checks are cashed however. She constantly is depressed because her kids are not doing what she wants them to do so that she can be happy. Think about that. When we visited them, they are not mean or nasty, most of the time. So does she give them money because it makes GF feel good, or does she give them money/bribe so they contact her? I am afraid good manners and respect for elders/parents has changed and I hope us baby boomer generation parents didn't create this.

You hang in there. We did the same. Helped & helped others to our fault. Plus in 1996 adopted an older child now 28.
We stopped finally. We had to. Just small things now & then but very small. But you take care. Thank u for sharing !!