OCD and Major Depression

Posted by mariajean03 @mariajean03, Oct 26, 2020

I'm overly medicated but am afraid to cut back. When I do I spend all nite worrying I won't sleep! All I do is lay there doing tormenting compulsions. Wake up very dizzy every morning,. It goes away in 2 hours. I need to taper off 325mg. Seraquel but too scared. I have been able to stay out of the hospital for a year though. So confused. Any suggestions? Maria.

@mariajean03

Where are treatment centers? Do they take Medicare? I'm in Des Moines and don't have the money or capacity to fly alone somewhere. Do they ever keep people for a life time when they can't function alone in society? I have no people or purpose. Maria.

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Maria, don't give up – God has a purpose for you because HE loves you! I think sometimes we find ourselves painfully alone so that we can realize that God is with us and will never leave us alone. I looked up mental health services in Des Moines and found several. I do not know this Clinic-only what they on their website. If you want to look up others do a Google Search on "Des Moines Mental Health". God still does miracles and I am praying for yours! HE rescued me–I know HE can do the same for you!
Behavioral Health Urgent Care
Des Moines Walk-In Mental Health Clinic

If you're experiencing a mental health crisis, UnityPoint Health – Behavioral Health Urgent Care is open Monday through Thursday, 9 a.m. to 7 p.m. and Friday from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. and is located at 1250 East 9th Street in Des Moines.

The new behavioral health urgent care clinic in central Iowa provides services to individuals who are needing mental health services, psychiatric evaluation and assessment, addiction medicine, crisis services and community resources. Both pediatric and adult patients can be seen at Urgent Care. Patients under 18 years of age must have a parent or guardian with them. Patients are advised to utilize the Emergency Room instead of the Urgent Care Clinic if they are needing immediate medical attention (i.e. open or fresh wounds), are a minor who does not have a guardian to sign a consent to treat, demonstrating aggressive behavior or having a crisis outside of the hours listed above.

If you or a loved one are considering taking actions related to ending one's own life, exhibit behaviors or actions that could lead to self-harm, overdose, or danger to yourself or others, this is considered an emergency. Please dial 9-1-1.

Contact Us

UnityPoint Health – Behavioral Health Urgent Care
1250 East 9th Street
Des Moines, IA 50316

(515) 263-2632

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@buyearly

Maria, don't give up – God has a purpose for you because HE loves you! I think sometimes we find ourselves painfully alone so that we can realize that God is with us and will never leave us alone. I looked up mental health services in Des Moines and found several. I do not know this Clinic-only what they on their website. If you want to look up others do a Google Search on "Des Moines Mental Health". God still does miracles and I am praying for yours! HE rescued me–I know HE can do the same for you!
Behavioral Health Urgent Care
Des Moines Walk-In Mental Health Clinic

If you're experiencing a mental health crisis, UnityPoint Health – Behavioral Health Urgent Care is open Monday through Thursday, 9 a.m. to 7 p.m. and Friday from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. and is located at 1250 East 9th Street in Des Moines.

The new behavioral health urgent care clinic in central Iowa provides services to individuals who are needing mental health services, psychiatric evaluation and assessment, addiction medicine, crisis services and community resources. Both pediatric and adult patients can be seen at Urgent Care. Patients under 18 years of age must have a parent or guardian with them. Patients are advised to utilize the Emergency Room instead of the Urgent Care Clinic if they are needing immediate medical attention (i.e. open or fresh wounds), are a minor who does not have a guardian to sign a consent to treat, demonstrating aggressive behavior or having a crisis outside of the hours listed above.

If you or a loved one are considering taking actions related to ending one's own life, exhibit behaviors or actions that could lead to self-harm, overdose, or danger to yourself or others, this is considered an emergency. Please dial 9-1-1.

Contact Us

UnityPoint Health – Behavioral Health Urgent Care
1250 East 9th Street
Des Moines, IA 50316

(515) 263-2632

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@mariajean03 Thank you @buyearly, you make an excellent and important point.

Yes, if you feel unable to keep yourself safe it's important to reach out to people, organizations, and entities that can help you do so.

Feeling like you are alone and lack purpose can be common feelings but that doesn't make them any less painful.

I'm wondering if you feel that you are able to keep yourself safe?

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@erikas

@mariajean03 Thank you @buyearly, you make an excellent and important point.

Yes, if you feel unable to keep yourself safe it's important to reach out to people, organizations, and entities that can help you do so.

Feeling like you are alone and lack purpose can be common feelings but that doesn't make them any less painful.

I'm wondering if you feel that you are able to keep yourself safe?

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I've been to urgent care in Des Moines. It was worthless. They had a terrible young Dr. there who told me to take Seraquel all day! I'm safe but in a terrible marriage. He's an x porn addict who hasn't touched me in 10 years. Now you can see the tension I'm in. He's nice but we fight all the time. I am so angry but can't afford to live alone. My siblings don't care and don't think I can move back to my home town. I'm ready to get a divorce and try though. What do I have to lose? I'm a good person but people reject me. Trying to recover from bunion surgery and need Jim's help. I also have colitis and Doctors are here! I have no one to turn to. Don't even drive in the city. Too scared. I grew up in an abusive family in a small town. My Dad was anyway. I've been trapped for 10 years. Pray someone reaches out. I feel so ready to give up. I try so hard just to be friends but dream of different men every nite. I'm his third marriage. What a joke! Maria.

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@mariajean03

I've been to urgent care in Des Moines. It was worthless. They had a terrible young Dr. there who told me to take Seraquel all day! I'm safe but in a terrible marriage. He's an x porn addict who hasn't touched me in 10 years. Now you can see the tension I'm in. He's nice but we fight all the time. I am so angry but can't afford to live alone. My siblings don't care and don't think I can move back to my home town. I'm ready to get a divorce and try though. What do I have to lose? I'm a good person but people reject me. Trying to recover from bunion surgery and need Jim's help. I also have colitis and Doctors are here! I have no one to turn to. Don't even drive in the city. Too scared. I grew up in an abusive family in a small town. My Dad was anyway. I've been trapped for 10 years. Pray someone reaches out. I feel so ready to give up. I try so hard just to be friends but dream of different men every nite. I'm his third marriage. What a joke! Maria.

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Maria, please don't give up. Things can turn around of which you are even unaware! I would suggest at this point that you take care of yourself. Believe me, I know how extremely hard it is to seek help when you are so depressed. But keep trying. If the doctor you saw was of no help, seek another. Or better still, call a mental health service who can work with you, maybe even on-line. If you feel like you are in danger of hurting yourself, call 911 for assistance. But, PLEASE don't give up. I am my husband's fourth wife and he has been verbally abusive at times but he has changed and grown over our 30-year marriage and I also had bunion surgery. Only to tell you that things can change, God loves you and there are several of us praying for you!

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@mariajean03

I've been to urgent care in Des Moines. It was worthless. They had a terrible young Dr. there who told me to take Seraquel all day! I'm safe but in a terrible marriage. He's an x porn addict who hasn't touched me in 10 years. Now you can see the tension I'm in. He's nice but we fight all the time. I am so angry but can't afford to live alone. My siblings don't care and don't think I can move back to my home town. I'm ready to get a divorce and try though. What do I have to lose? I'm a good person but people reject me. Trying to recover from bunion surgery and need Jim's help. I also have colitis and Doctors are here! I have no one to turn to. Don't even drive in the city. Too scared. I grew up in an abusive family in a small town. My Dad was anyway. I've been trapped for 10 years. Pray someone reaches out. I feel so ready to give up. I try so hard just to be friends but dream of different men every nite. I'm his third marriage. What a joke! Maria.

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@mariajean03 It is good you feel that you can keep yourself safe. It sounds like your childhood and marriage have been extremely difficult. It's important that we all have a support system and it sounds like you do not. It makes sense you feel trapped and alone. It must be hard to have financial and medical concerns piled on top of everything else.

Urgent care's job is only to stabilize you and refer you on. You probably need more long-term and holistic services. I believe with your medical and mental health (trauma) history that you would likely qualify for a county worker or hospital social worker. Many people are unaware that these types of services are available to them. In these sorts of cases with your challenges, it's important to explore and connect with any formal resource available. What do you know about these types of services?

REPLY
@mariajean03

I've been to urgent care in Des Moines. It was worthless. They had a terrible young Dr. there who told me to take Seraquel all day! I'm safe but in a terrible marriage. He's an x porn addict who hasn't touched me in 10 years. Now you can see the tension I'm in. He's nice but we fight all the time. I am so angry but can't afford to live alone. My siblings don't care and don't think I can move back to my home town. I'm ready to get a divorce and try though. What do I have to lose? I'm a good person but people reject me. Trying to recover from bunion surgery and need Jim's help. I also have colitis and Doctors are here! I have no one to turn to. Don't even drive in the city. Too scared. I grew up in an abusive family in a small town. My Dad was anyway. I've been trapped for 10 years. Pray someone reaches out. I feel so ready to give up. I try so hard just to be friends but dream of different men every nite. I'm his third marriage. What a joke! Maria.

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Sending love your way

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@jesfactsmon

@mariajean03
Hi Maria, your comment prompts me to say that I don't get why people are so judgemental of others just because they do not understand them. I think life is plenty difficult enough and I'm not sure why they don't just accept others for whatever they are, assuming they are not harming anyone else of course. I don't get many of my siblings (I have 6) but I do not reject any of them. I can love someone even if I don't understand them. Ugh, people! Hank

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Thanks Hank. One of my sisters is an alcoholic and she controls my other family members. I'm from a family of 6 and no one bothers to say Hi. My eldest is anorexic. She talked me into this terrible and fakey marriage. I have 2 normal siblings though and they could call and see how I'm doing! What have I done to deserve this? All i can do is try to forgive. Maria.

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@mariajean03

Where are treatment centers? Do they take Medicare? I'm in Des Moines and don't have the money or capacity to fly alone somewhere. Do they ever keep people for a life time when they can't function alone in society? I have no people or purpose. Maria.

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Hello Mariajean! I have a 33 yr old daughter that just moved back home due to job loss from covid. She has suffered for years with depression, and I believe, bi-polar disorder. She has been taking a generic Zoloft which has helped, but she still lacks energy and ambition. Her new dr added Abilify 3 days a week just this past Tuesday, and I already see it making some difference. I am sharing this with you because I understand the aggravation of trying to feel well and happy. It makes me sad that you feel you have no support from family or friends. That has to be terribly lonely for you. My husband and I took a free 12 week course through an organization called NAMI. It was called 'Family To Family'. It is a once weekly course where family members can learn about mental illness and what it is like inside the mind of those who suffer mental illness. It was a real eye-opener and made my husband more tolerant and understanding of what my daughter is going through. You may want to reach out to your family members and suggest that they take this course. I am sure it is on-line as a virtual meeting now due to covid. NAMI also has local support groups for both family members to meet with other family members, and a support group for those suffering from mental illness. You may want to connect with some local people who are going through the same things you are. You guys could even meet socially outdoors with distancing and masks. NAMI is a National Organization with chapters in just about every city and small town. Here is a link if you would like to look into it. Wishing you the best – Terri
https://www.nami.org/Find-Your-Local-NAMI/Affiliate/Details?state=IA&local=0011Q000022GBH3QAO and also: https://www.nami.org/Support-Education/Support-Groups

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@erikas

@mariajean03 It is good you feel that you can keep yourself safe. It sounds like your childhood and marriage have been extremely difficult. It's important that we all have a support system and it sounds like you do not. It makes sense you feel trapped and alone. It must be hard to have financial and medical concerns piled on top of everything else.

Urgent care's job is only to stabilize you and refer you on. You probably need more long-term and holistic services. I believe with your medical and mental health (trauma) history that you would likely qualify for a county worker or hospital social worker. Many people are unaware that these types of services are available to them. In these sorts of cases with your challenges, it's important to explore and connect with any formal resource available. What do you know about these types of services?

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I was supposed to get a case manager months ago. I filled out all the forms. It's thru Polk county but she has never replied. There's 60 client's to one person so I'll try again. But it's a very unstable program. How do I get a hospital social worker? I'm not sure but I think I need Medicaid for that. Do I get one thru my family Dr. Maria.

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@mariajean03

I was supposed to get a case manager months ago. I filled out all the forms. It's thru Polk county but she has never replied. There's 60 client's to one person so I'll try again. But it's a very unstable program. How do I get a hospital social worker? I'm not sure but I think I need Medicaid for that. Do I get one thru my family Dr. Maria.

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@mariajean03 I agree that you should contact your social worker again. As they say, the squeaky wheel gets the grease.

Regarding a hospital social worker, I'd try calling the hospital and tell them your needs and ask if they have someone you can talk to.

You might also want to do an internet search regarding non-profit organizations in your area and contact these entities to see if they have any services that may be helpful to you.

You could get a therapist that would help you learn skills to advocate and navigate such systems. The therapist would not do the work for you but they would help you to help yourself.

I'm wondering how you feel about contacting your current social worker?

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@mariajean03

I was supposed to get a case manager months ago. I filled out all the forms. It's thru Polk county but she has never replied. There's 60 client's to one person so I'll try again. But it's a very unstable program. How do I get a hospital social worker? I'm not sure but I think I need Medicaid for that. Do I get one thru my family Dr. Maria.

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@mariajean03
Maria, YOU ARE A GOOD PERSON. You are just in need of some help right now. Since no one in your life seems to want to help you, you need to help yourself, be your own best friend. Make a positive step right now and call your county case worker. See if she can take a little of her valuable time and give you some positive advice. Next, call one of your "normal" siblings and talk to them. Make them aware that you could use a little tender loving sibling care right now.

And lastly I would advise you to try to open lines of communication more with Jim. From what you say you sound like you have a lot of conflict and ambivalence about your relationship with him. He cares for you and you do appreciate him, yet he is distant emotionally and is addicted to porn, and you are thinking of divorcing him. Why not tell him that you want to talk about your relationship and your issues surrounding it. It sounds like you guys might benefit from having an open discussion about it if that is possible. There is nothing better for a relationship than open and frank discussion. Forgive me if I am overstepping any bounds. I just know that any issues I and my wife have had have always been resolved by talking them out. You mentioned something earlier about staying with him until he dies. Is he sick? Just trying to flesh out the whole picture.

All my best to you Maria, Hank

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@jesfactsmon

@mariajean03
Maria, YOU ARE A GOOD PERSON. You are just in need of some help right now. Since no one in your life seems to want to help you, you need to help yourself, be your own best friend. Make a positive step right now and call your county case worker. See if she can take a little of her valuable time and give you some positive advice. Next, call one of your "normal" siblings and talk to them. Make them aware that you could use a little tender loving sibling care right now.

And lastly I would advise you to try to open lines of communication more with Jim. From what you say you sound like you have a lot of conflict and ambivalence about your relationship with him. He cares for you and you do appreciate him, yet he is distant emotionally and is addicted to porn, and you are thinking of divorcing him. Why not tell him that you want to talk about your relationship and your issues surrounding it. It sounds like you guys might benefit from having an open discussion about it if that is possible. There is nothing better for a relationship than open and frank discussion. Forgive me if I am overstepping any bounds. I just know that any issues I and my wife have had have always been resolved by talking them out. You mentioned something earlier about staying with him until he dies. Is he sick? Just trying to flesh out the whole picture.

All my best to you Maria, Hank

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He's 83 and not sick. I'm 61 and we have nothing in common but our Catholic faith. We have never laughed together. I'm craving physical affection and we've both seen many therapists. Just when I try to look @ the positives we fight again. Thanks for caring Frank. No change is in sight because he gets angry when I mention his prior porn addiction. We are alone for the Holidays which makes matters worse. I try to reach out to siblings but they say be happy you have a friend. Maria.

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