~ Depressed and scared, not making it financially ~

Posted by .harp player @amberpep, Feb 26, 2019

I’m 74 years old and moved 3 years ago from MD to VA. My girls had hounded me to come down for several years so I finally did it. I sold my condo (at a loss), and a job with a dentist. Well, here I am, and financially I’m just not making it. That amount I earned from the dentist covered me with just a little left over. Now, more than often, I don’t have enough. I eeked out just enough for my rent this month, and now there’s not even enough for a quart of milk. I get S.S. and what I get goes right out for my rent (usually there’s enough), and my son sends me money each month. I’m sickened, depressed, and scared. I live in low income housing, and have a budget that practically squeaks. I’m thinking of starting to sell some of my furniture.
I so wish I’d have stayed in MD, for so many reasons, this being one of them. I have applied for oodles of jobs (they’re all on line now), and legally they’re not supposed to ask you how old you are (although many do), but they all ask when you graduated from either high school or college …. well, it doesn’t take rocket science to figure out how old a person is. I’m so depressed about this, and .so upset that my stomach.constantly churns.
Thanks for letting me vent.
abby

@lioness, Ah shucks, thanks. I'm just gabby! smiles Yep, I'm good and getting better day by day at saying: "tomorrow"!

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@fiesty76

@jimhd, I'm laughing because like you, I am a better starter than finisher for some projects. Amazing how I can just "not see" paperwork waiting action, dust bunnies growing sometimes by leaps and bounds! I don't blame mine on depression however. Told my daughter several years ago that I seemed to be becoming flakier because I was stopping before finishing some projects. Out of the mouth of this beauty came: "Mom, you've Always been a bit flaky." Did she Really have to share that truth??? I'm the only mom she has!!! smiles

Understand your soreness and hurting from the heavy duty digging, lifting and transporting of those thick and sometimes buried rocks. Same happened for me when i carted bucket loads of free river rocks to fill in a small flowerbed section in front next to neighbor. The really fantastic news is that the completed effort will be worth all your time and effort! No bermuda grass encroaching because I dug out the bed deeply and lined it with heavy duty plastic…no idea how deep the rock fill turned out to be but it took daily treks for weeks one summer to retrieve, wash and "build" the bed. Sharp shears prevent encroachement of grass/weeds and hilariously one lone iris sprouted in one tiny corner of the bed!!

I emptied a 40 gallon Rubbermaid container on wheels of maybe 3yrs? worth of moldering leaves. Managed to tip it over and rake out the fabulous leaf mold sitting on the ground but there was residual soggyness (?) lower down which resulted in a very muddy splotched gal. That was ok because I still had to fine spray mist some waiting-to-emerge seedlings and so misted self too which got some mud and made the effort cooler.

You'll be amazed and delighted…as probably will you wife, grins…at your masterful path completion!!! Your fans of both rocks and puzzles, we'll be eagerly waiting and hoping for a photo of your latest masterpiece! Just a thought to consider: one day hard; next day easy??? Sometimes that works.

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@lioness One of the best things about where we live is no Bermuda Grass!! Another is no possums or nutria.

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@jimhd

@lioness One of the best things about where we live is no Bermuda Grass!! Another is no possums or nutria.

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@jimhd That's good we had a lot about all 3 acres had Bermuda grass Kept Howard busy on tractor mowing What is nutria ,not familiar with that

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@lioness I won't be having any surgeries until the end of September. At least, none that require recovery time. When I met with the neurospecialist last week, we didn't get around to the subject of DRG. She had ordered an MRI of my lower back and Covid19 had put a hold on my appointment with her for 3 months. She saw on the scan that I have bad stenosis in my lumbar spine which could be causing some of my pain, though it's not possible to know exactly how much is neuropathy and how much is spinal stenosis. And the only way to find out is to correct the mess in my back. If I still have this much pain, then we have the neuropathy discussion.

You can probably guess why I won't have surgery until September. I'll give you a hint. It's my decision to wait until the end of September.

Unfortunately, waiting means living in a lot of pain longer than absolutely necessary.

Jim

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@lioness

@jimhd That's good we had a lot about all 3 acres had Bermuda grass Kept Howard busy on tractor mowing What is nutria ,not familiar with that

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Nutria are large rodents, the size of a cat. Someone brought them to Oregon, with the plan of selling their fur. When it didn't catch on, they just released them, and being good rodents, they multiplied, and now they're a real nuisance. I'm not positive that they're rodents. Maybe in the beaver family?

Jim

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@jimhd

@lioness One of the best things about where we live is no Bermuda Grass!! Another is no possums or nutria.

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@jimhd, Jim, no bermuda grass? I'm jealous!!!!

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@jimhd

@lioness I won't be having any surgeries until the end of September. At least, none that require recovery time. When I met with the neurospecialist last week, we didn't get around to the subject of DRG. She had ordered an MRI of my lower back and Covid19 had put a hold on my appointment with her for 3 months. She saw on the scan that I have bad stenosis in my lumbar spine which could be causing some of my pain, though it's not possible to know exactly how much is neuropathy and how much is spinal stenosis. And the only way to find out is to correct the mess in my back. If I still have this much pain, then we have the neuropathy discussion.

You can probably guess why I won't have surgery until September. I'll give you a hint. It's my decision to wait until the end of September.

Unfortunately, waiting means living in a lot of pain longer than absolutely necessary.

Jim

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@jimhd, I am so sorry you are living with so much pain. There otta' be a law against it!! Take care and try not to overdo.

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@jimhd

Nutria are large rodents, the size of a cat. Someone brought them to Oregon, with the plan of selling their fur. When it didn't catch on, they just released them, and being good rodents, they multiplied, and now they're a real nuisance. I'm not positive that they're rodents. Maybe in the beaver family?

Jim

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Here in New Mexico we have an invasion of the prairie dogs!

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@jimhd

@lioness I won't be having any surgeries until the end of September. At least, none that require recovery time. When I met with the neurospecialist last week, we didn't get around to the subject of DRG. She had ordered an MRI of my lower back and Covid19 had put a hold on my appointment with her for 3 months. She saw on the scan that I have bad stenosis in my lumbar spine which could be causing some of my pain, though it's not possible to know exactly how much is neuropathy and how much is spinal stenosis. And the only way to find out is to correct the mess in my back. If I still have this much pain, then we have the neuropathy discussion.

You can probably guess why I won't have surgery until September. I'll give you a hint. It's my decision to wait until the end of September.

Unfortunately, waiting means living in a lot of pain longer than absolutely necessary.

Jim

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@jimhd I do understand and we have to go where our heart leads us . Just take your pain pills till then . From all my post I think you know I go to my chiropractor for my back but not now of course with this virus he is still closed . But he showed me about the TENS unit which I use and the Activator they use instead of his hands they use this . With my pinched nerve I know it comes from my compressed fracture in lower back . I find the sore spot and use this on it believe it or not, cause I was sure surprised, it has really helped release something and doesn't hurt as before It takes a couple of times but what relief I got . very surprised myself . You take care and don't in the mean time hurt yourself anymore then you are now . Be safe in these times Happy 4th

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@jimhd

Nutria are large rodents, the size of a cat. Someone brought them to Oregon, with the plan of selling their fur. When it didn't catch on, they just released them, and being good rodents, they multiplied, and now they're a real nuisance. I'm not positive that they're rodents. Maybe in the beaver family?

Jim

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@jimhd Are they land animals or both water and land . Never heard of them . Its like back east then Australian rabbits over now they are all over . They have a different coat then American rabbits but now they have intermarried lol and now you can't tell the difference

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@fiesty76

@jimhd, Jim, no bermuda grass? I'm jealous!!!!

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@fiesty76 I fought the nasty stuff when we lived in central California. It was a losing battle for sure.

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@marjou

Here in New Mexico we have an invasion of the prairie dogs!

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@marjou We saw a million of those cute little guys in Roosevelt National Park. Our curse is sage rats, AKA Townsend Ground Squirrels. My dog loves hunting and catching them. It's amazing watching her stand at point for minutes, then dig furiously to catch them. She would eat them, except she usually brings them to the lawn, where I see them and toss them into the burn barrel. I don't like her eating them.

Jim

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@lioness

@jimhd Are they land animals or both water and land . Never heard of them . Its like back east then Australian rabbits over now they are all over . They have a different coat then American rabbits but now they have intermarried lol and now you can't tell the difference

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@lioness I looked it up in the dictionary. They're name is actually coypu, from South America, and are the only aquatic rodent.

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@jimhd

@lioness I looked it up in the dictionary. They're name is actually coypu, from South America, and are the only aquatic rodent.

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@jimhd Thanks Jim I thought they where both

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@jimhd

@fiesty76 I fought the nasty stuff when we lived in central California. It was a losing battle for sure.

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@jimhd, Jim, when I first started converting my backyard to flowerbeds, it took a large part of one summer to dig down to whatever lies deeply beneath TX to remove about 36" of Bermuda from parts of the yard. Incredible root system that allows Bermuda to spring up between cracks in sidewalk joints! Luckily, I was younger and stronger then and probably increased my muscle mass by inches!! vbg

When I eventually hired a prof. landscaper to convert the entire back to flower/veggie beds, I left only one small patch of grass. He had the equipment needed to upload the Bermuda before designing and adding new soil for the yard. Thank goodness!!!!

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