Being attacked by some negative ideas

Posted by aliali @aliali, Apr 23, 2022

I have depression. I am being attacked by the following ideas. I am afraid and anxious. This world is really terrifying. No one loves anyone in this world. I can sense that. When I deal with people working in restaurant or supermarket, I can sense how they are doing their job because they have to, not because they love their society. Okay, so why should I get anxious by this? Here it is; the product you receive whether it is from food industry or pharmaceutical industry or even you laptop of smartphone, you are not aware of the way it was manufactured and delivered to you. Probably food is not that clean; this makes me worry about my health and worry about that others don’t love me or anyone else. The clothes I am wearing currently, were they manufactured with care or not? Chemically manufactured stuff we are dealing with during our everyday life is manufactured from toxic chemicals. If these toxic chemicals are not removed properly then things will not be fine.
I really need help to get out of this loop

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I can truly relate to what you’re talking about! I’m the proverbial Little Mary Sunshine, Pollyanna and “the sun will come out tomorrow!” kind of person. But I have to admit, I see shadows of darkness trying to creep in around the edges of all my positivity lately. I have the absolute same concerns you have about wars, hatred, intolerance, lack of patience, aggression, people being mean, bullied, the state of our health, food, ecosystems, toxins and of course, our environment!
All of this uncertainty really begins to weigh heavily in my heart! It was a rather tongue in cheek comment, and said with laughter, but I told my husband the other day, “Had I known the world was turning this ugly, I’m not sure I would have bothered with all of my cancer treatment and fought so hard to stay alive!” While I didn’t really mean that, it’s certainly the first time I thought about ‘why did I bother’! And honestly, I am grateful we’re not grandparents. I can’t imagine the world waiting for those little kids, or their offspring.
However!! With all that being said, how I counteract this is with being a positive force! During my treatment for Leukemia, a motivational comment I heard at the beginning, has stuck with me the past 3 years. “The devil whispered in my ear, “You’re not strong enough to weather the storm.” I whispered back to the devil, “I AM the storm!” That phrase empowered me like you wouldn’t believe. I am still that storm and I’m filled with positive energy to help make my corner of the world the best place it can be for my family, friends and anyone else I can inspire to overcome whatever it is that’s causing so much anxiety.
So, for you, all I can suggest is to take comfort in your world around you. See the positive in something each day. Make little changes that bring joy to you or other people. Do charitable work. Engage in an artistic endeavor. Those brief moments or hours provide a healing distraction to help you cope with things you find dark and foreboding.
Do what you can in the environment to know you are contributing to the healing of our planet. Be mindful of what you purchase and where it’s made if you have reservations about something.
As far as worrying about people not loving you…not everyone will. It’s tough to swallow that concept. We all want to be loved. But the people who matter, do and will love you. The people who don’t matter? Then it’s none of your business what they think of you. ☺️
I found some pretty good articles that might help lift your sprits a little. They won’t cure the problems of the world but they may provide some sunshine on those dark clouds surrounding you. Be the force of positivity in your world!
https://www.huffpost.com/entry/highly-optimistic-people-_b_9803338

https://www.happierhuman.com/optimism-quotes/

What are some of your favorite things which bring you joy?

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I totally understand your thoughts and can relate! I try to catch myself when I’m thinking like that because even though they are human emotions and valid, they don’t serve me well. I’ve found that the practice of meditation really helps. I knew of meditation for years, but never really applied it to my life. Then I found an app I downloaded to my phone. It provides guided meditation and breathing exercises that calm my body and mind. I’ve been able to get over my intimidation of ‘not being able to meditate right’ and realized it’s not about getting it right, but the effort that counts. Listening to a calming voice guide me through positive thoughts while practicing breathing, has continued to change my focus from day to day in a positive way. I spend anywhere from 10 to 30 minutes a day, and it does wonders. I started with 10 to 12 minutes a day, that’s it! When I miss days, I notice myself slipping back into negative thinking and realize I need that help to re-prioritize my thoughts. Another way I shift my thinking is by finding some time when I need it to be in nature. Whether it’s going to a park, the beach or a local lake, or walking on a hiking trail, I try to fit in time to be near nature. I think we have got away from that important part of our lives. Our world seems to be going crazy! There are so many things that require our attention that do not nurture our mind, soul and heart! We live in busy cities that don’t connect us to our beautiful earth! I grew up on the west coast and now live 20 minutes inland. When I go spend time at the beach, it’s amazing to me how much it restores my sense of well-being. I love to go watch the sunset.
Changing negative focus, for me requires intentionally replacing it with something positive. Sounds simple but it takes being able to do that again and again throughout the day! I just know how important it is for my mental health. Even if it’s working on my potted plants on my patio or taking my dog for a walk, it’s maintenance for my mind! There are wonderful people in our world doing great things for humanity and our planet! I try to focus on them, rather than what is force fed us daily by the media.
Just remember you are not alone! You share the same concerns as so many, that just shows you care about our world! Now try to use that in a positive way and it will change your focus from negative to productive! It helped me to start with simple steps I could apply right away. Good luck to you!

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Thank you so much for sharing - I think the negative thinking and overthinking that comes with anxiety is overwhelming and I am having the same issue with events that are happening in the future that I continue to overthink and have more angst. You hear the words meditation and being "in the moment", but I believe that with anxiety, the wiring in our brains brings on this type type of reaction and thinking. I am really interested in the app you referred to - I am using another one for tinnitus which has helped me. This also suddenly became an issue about a year ago, and I am actively looking for therapists and support groups that deal with it.
Again, thank you for sharing.

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@merialh

Thank you so much for sharing - I think the negative thinking and overthinking that comes with anxiety is overwhelming and I am having the same issue with events that are happening in the future that I continue to overthink and have more angst. You hear the words meditation and being "in the moment", but I believe that with anxiety, the wiring in our brains brings on this type type of reaction and thinking. I am really interested in the app you referred to - I am using another one for tinnitus which has helped me. This also suddenly became an issue about a year ago, and I am actively looking for therapists and support groups that deal with it.
Again, thank you for sharing.

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Your so welcome! I have experienced anxiety at different times in my life. It can be very difficult to stay focused and thinking positive when experiencing anxiety! My dad told me once to stop and take 10 deep breaths to help with anxiety. I have had to pull my car over and stop to do some deep breathing before! I try to remind myself to stay on track with things I can control, rather than worry about things I can not. It’s not always that easy, but when I start repeating positive thoughts I seem to stop myself from getting carried away with negative and unproductive stuff. The app I listen to is called Calm. I pay, but I believe you can use it free too. It has a lot of different stuff. Sleep stories, music, breathing exercises and meditation. Check it out and see if it works for you. I know there are several out there. I have chronic pain along with depression so I feel mind and body healing is really important. All my best in your search for healing.

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A co-worker once told me that "It was their fatigue speaking" when some seemed unfriendly and less than caring. I found this to be the case, a measure of fatigue most often entered into their behavior. People may be spread thin with extra concerns and demands on their time these pandemic days. This part time co-worker brought me back nice gifts from her vacations, such as a big shell from Mexico. These gifts still bring me cheer and remind me of her thoughtfulness to this day. I recommend reading Painting as a Pastime by Winston Churchill for extra help in dealing with our times.

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I also feel hopeless at times when we are constantly reminded of how our world has changed in so many ways, but I wonder if some of our anxiety is due to the never ending stream of communication we allow to reach us when so much delivers negative news. When more time is devoted to the small happenings close to us, not the worldwide summary of bad news every day, we can see kindness, compassion, friendship and even love - often in response to efforts we extend ourselves.
There has always been evil in the world - it hasn't't always been reported so widely while the good around us every day goes unnoticed. Perhaps we can adjust the balance by looking for the good in each day?

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@normawatkins

I also feel hopeless at times when we are constantly reminded of how our world has changed in so many ways, but I wonder if some of our anxiety is due to the never ending stream of communication we allow to reach us when so much delivers negative news. When more time is devoted to the small happenings close to us, not the worldwide summary of bad news every day, we can see kindness, compassion, friendship and even love - often in response to efforts we extend ourselves.
There has always been evil in the world - it hasn't't always been reported so widely while the good around us every day goes unnoticed. Perhaps we can adjust the balance by looking for the good in each day?

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@normawatkins Welcome to Mayo Clinic Connect. You have made a powerful first post!

The good in my day today is my cat sound asleep near me, on her flannel blanket. And the sound of the new wind chimes as the breeze stirs them. What is the good in your day, today?
Ginger

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I feel a sense of doom every morning for the past few weeks, it gets better as the day goes on but it’s hard to start a new day like that, plus then I feel ungrateful for not being happy to be alive in the morning. I know for a fact other people have it much harder than I do but that still it doesn't help me, I’m praying, and trying to take care of myself more but my anxiety makes it hard to relax and enjoy the moment. I don’t want to upset or bring others down by sharing my thoughts so I just try to go on.

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@gingerw

@normawatkins Welcome to Mayo Clinic Connect. You have made a powerful first post!

The good in my day today is my cat sound asleep near me, on her flannel blanket. And the sound of the new wind chimes as the breeze stirs them. What is the good in your day, today?
Ginger

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I set out in heavy rain today and while stopped at a stop sign, a young man pulled up beside me, got out and handed me the umbrella I had left on top of my car while loading to leave. We laughed at my misdeed (I'm 91) and drove on, happy with the day. Such a small deed, but the gratitude lasted all day.

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@antonieta71

I feel a sense of doom every morning for the past few weeks, it gets better as the day goes on but it’s hard to start a new day like that, plus then I feel ungrateful for not being happy to be alive in the morning. I know for a fact other people have it much harder than I do but that still it doesn't help me, I’m praying, and trying to take care of myself more but my anxiety makes it hard to relax and enjoy the moment. I don’t want to upset or bring others down by sharing my thoughts so I just try to go on.

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Do you remember the TV show, Fraser? One of my favorite comments on the show was “What fresh hell awaits today?” We jokingly use that almost every morning when we get up. But I have to admit, with so many sad events in the world, and as @normawatkins said, the never ending stream of negative communication bombarding us, makes it really difficult to have a break in the anxiety.

One thing I really feel the need to do is to help you realize that it’s important to never compare yourself with someone else’s situation. No matter what they’re going through, it doesn’t diminish what you’re facing. To you, at this moment, what you’re trying to cope with is your own personal battle and it’s just as difficult. I think you’re dealing with this admirably by praying and taking care of yourself. Maybe try adding a few more activities to distract yourself such as reading, art work, walking, etc…and meditation is another calming action.

I know Covid has forced so many of us to lose normalcy in our lives. Not having contact with people we love, or being able to get out for dinners or activities adds to the loneliness and I think adds to our anxiety.
Do you have friends or family you can get together with? I can guarantee you’ll start feeling better when you share your thoughts with them and also, I think you’ll be surprised at how many of them are probably sharing the same anxiety as you. So don’t worry about bringing others down, you might actually be lifting each other up. ☺️

What do you enjoy doing during the day?

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