Anyone Else With PTSD?

For anyone living w/ PTSD symptoms vary. I had some terrible experiences w/ therapists and this did nothing but increase my symptoms. I was misdiagnosed and loaded up w/ anti psychotics which were so wrong-One therapist ended up w/ a 99 year suspension on her license and is still harassing and stalking me which is so difficult. I moved once and she found me...I did not file the charges against this therapist.

Living in fear is not the way to live out the rest of my life...I live in fear for my family too. I don't know where 2 of my adult children live because of this mess w/ someone that was supposed to be helping...I find it hard to trust.

I have grand children too. I live in fear for them. This sicko caused much harm to others as well. One less predator in the mental health system.

Maybe I can get some help from others. I grew up being abused and did not know as I partitioned by brain into other parts and did not need to deal...now I am trying to have some kind of life and fear has driven me back from others.

I can understand that some have been helped by the mental health system...I don't think there is help there or anywhere.

That was negative and also true.

@parus I am an incest survivor. I was physically and sexually abused as a child (we're talking broken bones stuff). I also was sexually assaulted as a young adult by a stranger. I decided to not let my abuse or past define me. I am a SURVIVOR. I do not need to give my abusers the power to continue to hurt me through flashbacks and triggers. They certainly aren't thinking on it any longer! A huge part of my childhood was taken - they WILL not take the rest of my life. It is MY choice. I am so very sorry you were not helped with therapy. There are some bad therapists out there, but there are many good ones. I am on medication for depression and find it really helps me. I know there are members in my own family who refuse to believe they have a mental illness (two are bi-polar and one is schizophrenic) and they "self" medicate with drugs and/or alcohol. It is so sad, as they are only making their life worse. There is no shame in having a mental illness. It is like any other illness. Your brain is an organ. If you had a brain tumor, you would get it looked at and fixed. But why people have a hard time with brain chemistry being out of balance and causing an illness (just like insulin in diabetes) is beyond me. I believe with all my heart and soul that there is help out there for everyone. Even if it is self education through books. The thing is, you must do all the hard work. Ignore what doesn't work for you and really practice what does. I am so sorry you feel so hopeless (sounds like depression to me - been there, done that many times!). There are even some studies which show brain chemistry is forever altered in children who have been through continuous situations of abuse and extreme stress. But this does NOT mean you can't live a good life. You don't have to be a product of your past. YOU decide who you want to be mentally and daily work to accomplish that goal. I am by no means saying it is easy. It is HARD, emotional work. It has taken me years (and, yes, medication). But I am so much better than I used to be. I, personally, also find my strength in God. I truly feel He has given me the strength and wisdom to move forward. I no longer hate my abusers. I certainly don't want to have lunch with them, but I can cast them aside in my mind with no anger when they pop up. So much is about changing the negative self talk, about replacing a negative emotion with a positive one. I will be praying for you. I know the road is long, but once you start putting one foot in front of the other and stop thinking about how far you have to go, you will see improvement.

Peaches, @magspierce Jim
I understand that. I have had to go no contact with my narcissistic mother and family of flying monkeys that aided in her horrible physical & verbal snd mental abuse.

Walking away from my whole family and getting healthy was the best thing that I ever did. I have found my own family. In my life blood is NOT thicker than water

And the hardest thing after was figuring out how not to run away like a bat out of hell every time I felt uncomfortable. And I felt uncomfortable a lot! When you are a child and the very people that are supposed to give you love and protection are your abusers, trust and self worth are only words to you.

Just know that you can get through it...and little by little you learn how to let people get past that wall of protection that you have built up around you.

There is a website called Out of the Storm, the first time I read the pages, I just couldn't stop crying with every word I found I wasn't alone in my pain... and just knowing that made me stronger.

Google complex PTSD quotes and you will see you are not alone! There are number of sites and blogs that can start you in the right direction with advice on things like how to find a therapist who understands the "complex".

((( hug))) to all of you!

I too suffer from PTSD and chronic depression. During the '80s and early '90s, I suffered from tremendous pain in my back and down my right leg. I had had two back surgeries when I was 17 and 18; one was for a spinal tumor. After my second surgery, the pain down my leg came back. By that time I had moved to a different town, so I went to see a neurologist. He told me all I had was a cyst on my spine and it shouldn't be causing me any pain. I asked him whether it could be another tumor, and of course, he said no. So I went home and tried to deal with my pain. I saw him several times more over the next seven years, telling him that my pain was getting much worse each time I saw him. I also saw a handful of other doctors trying to find the reason for my pain. They all told me it was all in my head, or I was looking for attention, or I was just looking for pain pills. Finally, after seven years of agonizing pain, and taking 56 Advil a day for the pain, I landed in the emergency room throwing up blood from a bleeding ulcer from all the Advil. The nurse gave me the name of another neurologist to see. So I went to him, and he did an MRI on my spine. What came back really threw me for a loop. I indeed had another spine tumor, this one was the size of three large grapefruits, and when it was finally removed, it weighed 8 pounds. Because the tumor was so large, I had to have one surgery on my back and one surgery from the front, because it had grown through my sacrum and into my pelvis. They had to cut the nerve roots at the spine so that the tumor would not grow back. Because of that, I could no longer walk. My right leg would not work. During that time I was in pain, and the doctors telling me it was all in my head, my family didn't believe that I was really in pain. I spent seven years living in my room never leaving to go anywhere and angry as hell that I had to live that way. It has taken me 26 years to deal with all I went through, but I still can't get past the anger I feel towards all the doctors who wouldn't believe that I was in so much pain. I have had to have seven spine surgeries in all, with my last one being in 2016. I now have to walk with a cane and have so much metal in my spine just to hold it upright. I hurt my back when I was 16 and am now 52 and still dealing with pain and anger. Of course, it's not the same pain I had back then, but I still have to live with pain every day. And now with the crack down on people with chronic pain and getting the medicine we need just to live a normal life because, of course, all of us with chronic pain abuse our pain meds, I might not be able to get the pain medication I need. It is really frustrating. Thank you all for letting me vent. It does help to get this off my chest.

I surely am not alone.

I surely am not alone.

For anyone living w/ PTSD symptoms vary. I had some terrible experiences w/ therapists and this did nothing but increase my symptoms. I was misdiagnosed and loaded up w/ anti psychotics which were so wrong-One therapist ended up w/ a 99 year suspension on her license and is still harassing and stalking me which is so difficult. I moved once and she found me...I did not file the charges against this therapist.

Living in fear is not the way to live out the rest of my life...I live in fear for my family too. I don't know where 2 of my adult children live because of this mess w/ someone that was supposed to be helping...I find it hard to trust.

I have grand children too. I live in fear for them. This sicko caused much harm to others as well. One less predator in the mental health system.

Maybe I can get some help from others. I grew up being abused and did not know as I partitioned by brain into other parts and did not need to deal...now I am trying to have some kind of life and fear has driven me back from others.

I can understand that some have been helped by the mental health system...I don't think there is help there or anywhere.

That was negative and also true.

Hi everyone , I also suffer from drug resistant depression and come from an abusive background. PTSD is a part of my life as well. In your posts I learned that there are other people who suffer from debilitating fatigue as well. It is nice to know that I am not alone . I am new to this forum and I am grateful to have found you here! Thistime of year is very difficult for my due the Seasonal Affective Disorder. For some reason it starts early for me.

I am the one starting this thread and if I could I would delete it!! Extremely naive on my part. This is not helpful for me and if it has been harmful to others I am sorry.

Hi everyone , I also suffer from drug resistant depression and come from an abusive background. PTSD is a part of my life as well. In your posts I learned that there are other people who suffer from debilitating fatigue as well. It is nice to know that I am not alone . I am new to this forum and I am grateful to have found you here! Thistime of year is very difficult for my due the Seasonal Affective Disorder. For some reason it starts early for me.