Multiple sclerosis caregiver

Posted by Unbroken @unbroken, Apr 26, 2012

How are you coping with being an MS caregiver? Don't most of the "keep your chin up and count your blessings" blogs get old? !!

Do you think taking an antidepressant to help with the sadness of seeing your husband with a SAD disease seem reasonable? If it is a sad situation, I should feel sad. I'm not depressed, I'm discouraged and sad. Is there a pill for that?

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Caregivers Support Group.

My husband is also battling this disease but I too have days where I just want him to be perfect even for just one day we are together. What I do is read about his disease, try to be his friend (he needs that in a caregiver/spouse), and make sure that the times he could be smiling even though he may be in pain to make sure he is doing that.

I love my husband because I feel that he loves me for who I am completely and would give anything to change his circumstances if he could. But in reality, medicating yourself for a situation that cannot be helped by you or your husband for the long term I would really not suggest. If at all possible any kind of therapy would be beneficial just so you can release your feelings, recharge, and sometimes just do something else besides worry. Me personally, my therapy comes from asking my husband about his medications, his PT and reading about the advances medicine is making in MS. I know that may be little to hold on to but if it helps know that you are not alone.

I wouldn't trade my husband for anyone else in the whole world, MS plays absolutely no role in that. I love my husband because he can do a dead on impersonation of all my family members and have me dying with laughter. I love my husband because he makes me feel beautiful all the days he has known me. I love my husband for even on the days when he is exhausted or stiff with pain and irritation that he still finds time to help me study for a totally worthless exam to get into nursing school. I say all of this because for us coping is a lifestyle and even though it can get grueling and exhausting some days, nothing stays the same forever and you still have one another to be thankful for.

Hopefully this helps calm your heart some and your family continues to heal. God Bless.


My spouse has advanced secondary progressive with moderate dementia. When I find myself asking, what's the point of it all, I find that Lexapro for six months or so helps me restart. when I told my internist it seems reasonable to be depressed about a depressing situation, my internet said it doesn't matter why you are depressed, medication can help. Medication is not just to treat depression of people who have no reason to be depressed. I can help my loved ones best when I am not depressed. I am not on medication now, but I will not hesitate to take it again if I need it. everyone must make this assessment for themselves, but advice from a trusted medical professional is helpful in some cases. .life can be grimm for those of us watching our loved one slip further into secondary progressive.


I was my mother's caregiver. She suffered from MS and Parkinson's Disease. The MS took a huge toll out on her as well as the family. My mother was diagnosed when I was 5 years old (in 95) but did not have the bad symptoms until much later. When i was around 16 she began to slow down. In 2008, she became paralyzed in her right arm ( which ended up being the side she had Parkinson's on.) I noticed that she couldn't walk as fast, move her arms as fast, or even hold a pen the same way. It was extremely difficult to watch. I went from being taken care of to the one taking care of her. I wouldn't take a second of it back. Towards the end of her young life, I was helping her change her diapers and pushing her in a wheelchair. My mother could not walk without falling or loosing balance. She was very aggravated because she was a strong, independent woman her entire life. Sadly, my mother passed away on February 9, 2012. It was the saddest day of my life. Her death was not related to either of these diseases. Continuing on without her is a daily struggle.

I'm not going to use any of those cheesy lines like you mentioned. I lived through it. I battled MS with my mother. Though I could not feel her physical pain, I felt pain right along with her. If I could give any advice to anyone that is a caregiver to a loved one with MS, I'd say to make them remember that MS will not win. The fight is worth fighting but fighting too hard can sometimes hurt them. Its okay to cry. Its okay to be frustrated. Its okay to have days where you don't want to get out of bed. Just remember one thing; the battle you're struggling with isn't half of what they are dealing with. Don't show them you're fears but let them know you care. There are going to be days where they CAN'T get out of bed; you fight for them. Be their strength.

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