Does anyone feel old and useless with age?

Posted by sally12345 @sally12345, Sep 13, 2023

Hi, I'm almost 64.. I'm feeling old and useless. My strength isn't good anymore. Like it used to be mainly side effects of meds. My health is poor with cvsd. Osteoporosis, poor circulation, hearing , eyesight, you name it's going. I always took care of myself. Now I've gotten older and everything's wrong, my grandkids don't a want me around and they are little still. No friends to talk with or do things with. Why is it we spend our lifetime taking care of family. Loving friends to end up , old and tired. Useless.

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Depression & Anxiety Support Group.

A lot of good suggestions have been offered and many work well. Having been a business woman from the age of 20, in retirement I found I needed a purpose in life in addition to enjoying finally being retired @ 65. I live by myself with 2 precious kitties who light up my life every day. Pets are wonderful mood boosters. Early in my retirement I submitted an application to join the Senior Advisory Board @ my local city. They plan activities for the city's seniors (most are free), have fairs during the year, day trips, dances, hobby & exercise classes, Bingo, movies, a book club, lunches, etc. I was so happy that I was successful in being appointed to the Board and served on it for 16 yrs. In doing something that enlivens other seniors' lives made mine even better! I would encourage seniors to visit their city's senior centers or those of other cities nearby and make new friends & attend events & games. I've been told by many of our seniors that they have made wonderful friendships at the center and support has always been there when life problems happen. One lady I am friends with recently lost her husband and was getting very depressed but was not leaving her home. I encouraged her to return to the senior center where she had friends & she did. She's doing much better now. Over the years I've made many good friends who are a big part of my life. Hope you'll look into a senior center at a city near you. If you don't drive, most have bus service to and from the center.

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Faith is above all else in the world. It's as I have always said, no one can take it away and in the end it's all we have.

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@sally12345

Faith is above all else in the world. It's as I have always said, no one can take it away and in the end it's all we have.

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So true...Jesus said, "Come to me all you who labor and are heavy-laden, and I will give you rest".
Back in the 60's a young girl named Joni Erickson dove into a lake and hit her head on something solid. She was 17 at the time. Friends noticed her floating, seemingly lifeless. They pulled her in and resusitated her. She was mostly paralyzed from the neck down. She could have curled up in a ball and withdrawn from life. Instead she learned to paint holding a painbrush between her teeth. She felt sure that God was going to heal her. When it became evident that was not His plan, she soldiered on, eventually getting married and starting a foundation called "Joni and Friends", using the money from the sales of her painting and speaking engagements. Yes, God used her despite her severe injury.

How many of us could have risen up and taken control of our life, given such a horrific injury. Your life is over then the Lord calls you home.

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@heisenberg34

So true...Jesus said, "Come to me all you who labor and are heavy-laden, and I will give you rest".
Back in the 60's a young girl named Joni Erickson dove into a lake and hit her head on something solid. She was 17 at the time. Friends noticed her floating, seemingly lifeless. They pulled her in and resusitated her. She was mostly paralyzed from the neck down. She could have curled up in a ball and withdrawn from life. Instead she learned to paint holding a painbrush between her teeth. She felt sure that God was going to heal her. When it became evident that was not His plan, she soldiered on, eventually getting married and starting a foundation called "Joni and Friends", using the money from the sales of her painting and speaking engagements. Yes, God used her despite her severe injury.

How many of us could have risen up and taken control of our life, given such a horrific injury. Your life is over then the Lord calls you home.

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What a wonderful post! I hope this will provide some inspiration to Sally. I have been supporting a mouth & foot painting organization (https://mfpausa.com) for years. It adds meaning to the proverb, "When life gives you lemons, make lemonade." It all starts with taking the first step, which admittedly is hard. But, once taken it will lead to many more. Carpe diem!

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@sally12345

Faith is above all else in the world. It's as I have always said, no one can take it away and in the end it's all we have.

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Sally,
You are so right! I remember when I was living with my Mom in my 30's and we didn't have enough money for the house rent. I asked Mom, "What are we going to do?" She just said, "We are going to sit here and pray! God will provide!" Sure enough, the next day an unexpected check came in the mail that was plenty to pay the rent! Some company had been in a law suit and since we had purchased some of their goods, we were reimbursed and just in time!
Keep praying! It will work out somehow.
PML

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I am older than dirt, however, I reach out and volunteer serving seniors in need.

Most of this has to do with attitude, I have convinced myself that I am useful, that I am still able to contribute to society and I figure out ways to accomplish my task on hand.

Sitting home waiting for people to visit you is not the answer. Groups are always looking for volunteers, the local library might need a volunteer, your church, most any 501c3 charity, you can google your local charities and get involved.

Do something even if it is wrong, you can always pivot and do something else.

Read a book about your subconscious mind and how to feed it positive thoughts that will become reality.

Remember it is not so much the circumstance you find yourself in...it is how you handle it. Might be time to reframe your thinking.

Sending support your way!

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@dollyme

I am older than dirt, however, I reach out and volunteer serving seniors in need.

Most of this has to do with attitude, I have convinced myself that I am useful, that I am still able to contribute to society and I figure out ways to accomplish my task on hand.

Sitting home waiting for people to visit you is not the answer. Groups are always looking for volunteers, the local library might need a volunteer, your church, most any 501c3 charity, you can google your local charities and get involved.

Do something even if it is wrong, you can always pivot and do something else.

Read a book about your subconscious mind and how to feed it positive thoughts that will become reality.

Remember it is not so much the circumstance you find yourself in...it is how you handle it. Might be time to reframe your thinking.

Sending support your way!

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This is such a great idea. Thank you. Can you share specific books or authors?

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@love57

This is such a great idea. Thank you. Can you share specific books or authors?

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I have read several books on this topic by Joseph Murphy. I believe that the subconscious mind is the river that flows to the conscious mind, once the conscious mind believes what it is being fed, it will happen.

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@dollyme

I have read several books on this topic by Joseph Murphy. I believe that the subconscious mind is the river that flows to the conscious mind, once the conscious mind believes what it is being fed, it will happen.

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Thank you. I’ll check some out.

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I’m 64 too and just the past few years starting to have some more pronounced medical problems that have made me have to change my diet more seriously. I used to have a childhood girlfriend out of state but we don’t talk anymore. I talk with my younger brother out of state twice a month and I feel like he always gets an earful from me. My husband is 76 and he has worse health problems so we are both learning about all these medical problems together. I never really ate that bad to begin with. He has always ate twice what I eat. He has said he needed the energy to work hard. He since has developed Diabetes2. Our 2 kids and a son in law are living with us. I like them being nearby (they live in another part of our house) but we all don’t get along at times. They keep busy working for the most part and sometimes take a vacation doing touristy stuff. Only 1 of them has a drivers license. We still jockey around the others. It keeps us busy but it worries me that 2 of them aren’t more self sufficient. I developed a neoplasm cancer on my thigh after a dog bite that happened over 10 years ago. Now I have another one growing on my face and I am having a hard time getting proper help to get it removed. The medical staff aren’t always clear with me and I have been finding some of them difficult to even get ahold of when necessary. A fairly local Dermatologist sent me to see an Oculoplastic Surgeon for this recent medical issue, 2-3 hrs away and with us being in our 60’s-70’s we are just finding it quite difficult to have to travel that far away for medical care of this type. I have been trying to move us back nearby to my younger brother who I feel gives me moral support and where I grew up at and where there is more variety of health care available but the cost of another house there with the interest rates as high as they are lately and the cost of real estate taxes there we are finding we would have to settle for a cheaper home then what we even have now and we could only be in a shorter driving distance to my brother then where we are now (he lives in a town with a population of about 201,000 as opposed to us at an under 2,000 population.). So many negatives and not enough positives has me feeling pretty depressed.

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