1. < Caregivers: Dementia

Dealing with a Spouse with a “Mild Cognitive Impairment”

Posted by tryingtimes10 @tryingtimes10, Dec 31, 2024

My husband was diagnosed with MCI in 2019. He is pretty independent, just forgetful of time, dates, location of places, anything electronic & events from our life together (we’ve been married 52 years). It’s all just getting to me. I find myself wanting to be alone so I’m not continuously reminded of these changes. Because my friends/family are out of state, working, or involved with their own families, I really have no one to talk to so I’m seeing a therapist twice a week to deal with the sadness, anger, grief I have over his condition. I just wonder if other women find themselves in this position & how they are dealing with it.

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agnes01 | @agnes01 | 19 hours ago
In reply to @colleenyoung "Hi @agnes01, I just want to say welcome. You're so right that not knowing the future..." + (show)
@colleenyoung

Hi @agnes01, I just want to say welcome. You're so right that not knowing the future can create a lot of anxiety. Glad you came here to learn with others. Things will change, always. Your biggest challenge is adapting to those changes. But you're not alone.

When a new frustration, complication, or behavior leads to you asking questions, now you have a place to find answers, share or just plain vent.

How are you and your husband doing today?

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Hi Colleen, thank you for your kind words. We are doing fine. I am getting over the flu and my husband is busy with the newspaper. I am learning to take over the paperwork and some other things. One of the biggest is expectations. I know there are times he may remember and times he will have a blank stare. Thankfully he is almost always in a good mood and does not get upset with himself. My regards and thoughts are with you and the others in this group.

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bclane | @bclane | 17 hours ago
In reply to @centre "If you want to try, the alone time I found was to set my cell phone..." + (show)
@centre

If you want to try, the alone time I found was to set my cell phone alarm on low volume on the bedside table next to my head and set it for a time that I knew I would have at least an hour before he normally woke up. I’d slide carefully out of bed, tiptoe to the door, gently ease it open and closed, go to the bathroom, then go make coffee, which I would enjoy in a chair next to a window and use my I-pad to read a newspaper, do a puzzle, read the daily e-mailed Guideposts- whatever felt relaxing.
Ya gotta do what ya gotta do 🤣😂

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I usually get up around 6. Often my husband does, too, but other times he sleeps in. But he also goes to bed early—generally around 7:30 or 8—and I stay up until around 10:30 reading. I really look forward to those quiet hours before I lie down. I usually sleep just fine and that might be part of it—although my taking the occasional "chill pill" (doctor prescribed) probably helps, too. 🙂 I know some people need time on their own with other people than the one they're caring for, but some of us really just need the alone time.

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