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As a caregiver, what helps you the most?

Posted by canadaanne @canadaanne, Mar 27 7:47am

What do you do to help your own wellbeing? What has helped, and what hasn’t?

I know it is important to look after myself so I can give the best care I can. I also know that at times everything feels so overwhelming that I don’t want to do anything.
I have found my daily walks with my dog help. I’m thankful that I have to do this - even on days when I don’t want to go, I feel better having done so.
Massage - I have a great RMT who told me my only job while having a massage was to just breathe. The hour or so of just focusing on breathing very therapeutic, aside from the benefit of the actual massage.
The love and support of family and friends has also helped me - whether it a quick phone call or text, or a visit or walk.
Chatting with people online in the forums here has also been helpful.

Take care all. It’s a journey none of us want to be on, but here we are.

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Caregivers Support Group.

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Moderator
Colleen Young, Connect Director | @colleenyoung | 1 day ago
In reply to @mastaneh "Reading how much the love and support of your family and friends has helped you makes..." + (show)
Profile picture for mastaneh @mastaneh

Reading how much the love and support of your family and friends has helped you makes me realize just how vital that connection is. Navigating this journey emotionally by yourself is incredibly hard.

I don’t know how many others here are experiencing this, but as a solo caregiver, I have no support—not even from my husband’s daughters or his family. I never expected much, but just a little emotional support would have meant everything.

Going from being a very successful career woman to a full-time caregiver, while preparing my husband for a liver transplant, has been an extremely difficult transition. When you ask what helps and what doesn't—what hasn't helped is the profound isolation of doing this alone. Finding this support group is my first real step toward finding the community, understanding, and emotional support that I truly need right now."

Jump to this post

The success of an organ transplant relies on the support of a main caregiver. With such a responsibility, I can hardly imagine doing it alone. Caregivers need support too.

@mastaneh, I encourage you to join the discussions in the Transplants support group here: https://connect.mayoclinic.org/group/transplants/

There are many transplant caregivers who know what you are dealing with and understand. Here are a couple to introduce you into the discussions:
- Transplant Caregiver Advice: Got Tips to Share?https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/transplant-caregiver-advice-got-tips-to-share/

- What to watch for as a caregiver after liver transplant?https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/what-i-should-stay-watchful-as-a-caregiver-after-liver-transplant/

REPLY
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grace4u | @grace4u | 23 hours ago

I’m so glad you have the support and love from your family and friends. My family understands nothing. I can’t talk to them about anything because they don’t get it and they just Tell me I’m resenting my husband and that I’m not being loving. In the meantime, I’m drowning. My husband has MCI, but denies at all, he cannot hear very well, even with his hearing aids, and now he has fallen and fractured his elbow. I too am looking for some help either with him or for myself. My house Seems to be falling down around me as there is no time for anything. Some evenings I can get out for a walk and some weeks I can get out with a girlfriend for coffee. Nothing on a regular basis. I have tried some Life coaching, which seems to help. She says to go outside for 10 minutes and close my eyes and name three things that I hear. Believe it or not that seems to calm me down for a little while. The rule of thumb is to put your oxygen on before you put it on anyone else. That is easier said than done as we are finding on this journey.

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