Anyone Else With PTSD?

Posted by Parus @parus, Jul 21, 2017

Curious

Parus, don't worry. I've known two people who had bladder cancer, both of who survived and went on to live very productive lives. I will keep you in my prayers, and I pray your outcome is as good as my friends.

REPLY
@kimspr3

Hi Vicki, I had ECT when I was 18. In those you were not given any sedation. Woke up in my room and had no memory of the procedure. Someone sat with me until little by little my memory came back but not sure how much it did. Having PTSD did I block parts of my childhood, or was it the ECT? I had 35 sessions, s lot, is that amount done today? As far as I know it did nothing for me? I don't remember if I had muscle pain or just pain? I know I need that person to sit with me because I was so confused. I was an in-patient in a beautiful hotel like setting. My parents did their best for me. Curious to the setting you were in before it was done. For me, It was done in the basement sitting on a long bench waiting with others, a nurse would call our name when we were next. We also heard the noise, scary. I haven't thought about that in years.

Jump to this post

Dear @kimspr3, yes, ECT treatments are given in the same amounts as you remember. Some people take a treatment once a month forever. They swear it does a world of good for them, but I never noticed any good or bad affect. I only had about 4 or 5 sessions. I do understand that the process used to be much more brutal. My mother-in-law took treatments without sedation; it was awful. She forgot so many things; how to cook, her place in society and the world, and my father-in-law took care of her for the rest of her life. She because very religious (she was pretty devout even before, but she became scrupulous. I'm not making fun, but you had to be very, very careful what you did with her anointed palm because she burned it in the night when she was afraid. She was the sweetest of women, and she would do anything for you she was able; the same with my father-in-law. I was blessed to have them given the abuse in my own home. But back to ECT, I found it not to be helpful, but I met a young women during my process who believed she absolutely could not live without it. Same question involved with any treatment we have gone through in our lives – it works for some of us, not for others of us.

REPLY

@parus I understand where you are coming from. I had my own PTSD when I was facing my spine surgery and I had 2 years to worry about that before it happened. There were traumatic events in my past that were linked to the fear of pain and I had panic attacks every time I thought about surgery every morning for 4 months, then I started asking myself questions about where this fear had come from and why was I doing this to myself? I realized that we are not born with fear, and fear is learned in our experiences. I told myself that if fear was learned, then I could unlearn it, and I did. I realized that I had all the tools I needed to start confronting my fear. Fear sneaks up on you unconsciously, so get to know it and make friends with it so you can be at peace. It will still be there, but what is different is that you can control the fear instead of the fear controlling you and you can stop the automatic response. I had also compared the physical pain from whatever medical procedure I was feeling to a very painful experience before I came to Mayo where I had with a spinal injection that was the highest level of pain I had ever experienced, enough pain that I was uncontrollably shaking and couldn't stop for a long time and I was getting zapped with frequent stabbing electric shock pains that started with the injection and went on for a few weeks. I used to pass out from much less and I was well on my way to that, but after that procedure, I began using visualization of a beautiful place with deep slow breathing and imagined music I loved, and I was able to stop myself from passing out, a true victory. In comparison, I can tell myself that other issues are not as bad as that and it takes some power away from the apprehension. The pain from my spine surgery and the recovery afterward was not even close to the pain I had experienced from the spinal injection, and I could tolerate my surgical recovery without any pain medication. I had the prescriptions, but never took any. I was a little surprised by that because I had imagined it would be much worse, and that also speaks to how well I had defeated my fears. Fear increases pain a lot. I had been using music and breathing and learned to lower my blood pressure and I did that anytime I got nervous about surgery, so it was easy to use that as a method to remain calm and in control at a time when I really needed it. That's how I started confronting my fears, and later I added in artwork and doing sketches of my doctor which lead to something wonderful for me and that became my Mayo patient story. You can design your own emotional therapy with whatever creative outlet works for you…. maybe that's a walk outside in nature, a pet, music, crafts… humor. I hope that helps, and you are not alone. We are here for you.

REPLY
@jenniferhunter

@parus I understand where you are coming from. I had my own PTSD when I was facing my spine surgery and I had 2 years to worry about that before it happened. There were traumatic events in my past that were linked to the fear of pain and I had panic attacks every time I thought about surgery every morning for 4 months, then I started asking myself questions about where this fear had come from and why was I doing this to myself? I realized that we are not born with fear, and fear is learned in our experiences. I told myself that if fear was learned, then I could unlearn it, and I did. I realized that I had all the tools I needed to start confronting my fear. Fear sneaks up on you unconsciously, so get to know it and make friends with it so you can be at peace. It will still be there, but what is different is that you can control the fear instead of the fear controlling you and you can stop the automatic response. I had also compared the physical pain from whatever medical procedure I was feeling to a very painful experience before I came to Mayo where I had with a spinal injection that was the highest level of pain I had ever experienced, enough pain that I was uncontrollably shaking and couldn't stop for a long time and I was getting zapped with frequent stabbing electric shock pains that started with the injection and went on for a few weeks. I used to pass out from much less and I was well on my way to that, but after that procedure, I began using visualization of a beautiful place with deep slow breathing and imagined music I loved, and I was able to stop myself from passing out, a true victory. In comparison, I can tell myself that other issues are not as bad as that and it takes some power away from the apprehension. The pain from my spine surgery and the recovery afterward was not even close to the pain I had experienced from the spinal injection, and I could tolerate my surgical recovery without any pain medication. I had the prescriptions, but never took any. I was a little surprised by that because I had imagined it would be much worse, and that also speaks to how well I had defeated my fears. Fear increases pain a lot. I had been using music and breathing and learned to lower my blood pressure and I did that anytime I got nervous about surgery, so it was easy to use that as a method to remain calm and in control at a time when I really needed it. That's how I started confronting my fears, and later I added in artwork and doing sketches of my doctor which lead to something wonderful for me and that became my Mayo patient story. You can design your own emotional therapy with whatever creative outlet works for you…. maybe that's a walk outside in nature, a pet, music, crafts… humor. I hope that helps, and you are not alone. We are here for you.

Jump to this post

Thank you. You addressed my fear issue beautifully.

REPLY
@jenniferhunter

@parus I understand where you are coming from. I had my own PTSD when I was facing my spine surgery and I had 2 years to worry about that before it happened. There were traumatic events in my past that were linked to the fear of pain and I had panic attacks every time I thought about surgery every morning for 4 months, then I started asking myself questions about where this fear had come from and why was I doing this to myself? I realized that we are not born with fear, and fear is learned in our experiences. I told myself that if fear was learned, then I could unlearn it, and I did. I realized that I had all the tools I needed to start confronting my fear. Fear sneaks up on you unconsciously, so get to know it and make friends with it so you can be at peace. It will still be there, but what is different is that you can control the fear instead of the fear controlling you and you can stop the automatic response. I had also compared the physical pain from whatever medical procedure I was feeling to a very painful experience before I came to Mayo where I had with a spinal injection that was the highest level of pain I had ever experienced, enough pain that I was uncontrollably shaking and couldn't stop for a long time and I was getting zapped with frequent stabbing electric shock pains that started with the injection and went on for a few weeks. I used to pass out from much less and I was well on my way to that, but after that procedure, I began using visualization of a beautiful place with deep slow breathing and imagined music I loved, and I was able to stop myself from passing out, a true victory. In comparison, I can tell myself that other issues are not as bad as that and it takes some power away from the apprehension. The pain from my spine surgery and the recovery afterward was not even close to the pain I had experienced from the spinal injection, and I could tolerate my surgical recovery without any pain medication. I had the prescriptions, but never took any. I was a little surprised by that because I had imagined it would be much worse, and that also speaks to how well I had defeated my fears. Fear increases pain a lot. I had been using music and breathing and learned to lower my blood pressure and I did that anytime I got nervous about surgery, so it was easy to use that as a method to remain calm and in control at a time when I really needed it. That's how I started confronting my fears, and later I added in artwork and doing sketches of my doctor which lead to something wonderful for me and that became my Mayo patient story. You can design your own emotional therapy with whatever creative outlet works for you…. maybe that's a walk outside in nature, a pet, music, crafts… humor. I hope that helps, and you are not alone. We are here for you.

Jump to this post

@jenniferhunter Thank you for your input. I have now started taking a small sketch pad with me everywhere I go that is scary for me. Due to spinal issues I am not able to draw and paint as I would like to be doing. My safe place. My support comes from connect members. Fear does increase pain. Having an anxiety disorder as well causes more challenges. Doctors/nurses
don't have the time to deal with these disorders and I understand. Takes a lot of psyching myself up to get to appointments.
at times I want to give up. I think about my 4 year old grandson and how he adores me. I then know I must keep trying.

REPLY
@parus

@jenniferhunter Thank you for your input. I have now started taking a small sketch pad with me everywhere I go that is scary for me. Due to spinal issues I am not able to draw and paint as I would like to be doing. My safe place. My support comes from connect members. Fear does increase pain. Having an anxiety disorder as well causes more challenges. Doctors/nurses
don't have the time to deal with these disorders and I understand. Takes a lot of psyching myself up to get to appointments.
at times I want to give up. I think about my 4 year old grandson and how he adores me. I then know I must keep trying.

Jump to this post

@parus We're proud of you for persevering! Over the years I have discovered that having a book to read, some crochet or pen and paper for writing/sketching [and sometimes all three!] with me everywhere I go, helps me be prepared. When those times of stress and strain come over me, I can turn to something that will calm me down. I never know when one of those moments will hit, and what will trigger it. I finally found that this is what works for me and I don't care if I look like a bag lady; it's my lifeline. Put a favorite picture of your grandson inside your purse and pull it out to look at it when you need to. Let his smiling happy face pull you back to positive thoughts.
Ginger

REPLY
@jenniferhunter

@parus I understand where you are coming from. I had my own PTSD when I was facing my spine surgery and I had 2 years to worry about that before it happened. There were traumatic events in my past that were linked to the fear of pain and I had panic attacks every time I thought about surgery every morning for 4 months, then I started asking myself questions about where this fear had come from and why was I doing this to myself? I realized that we are not born with fear, and fear is learned in our experiences. I told myself that if fear was learned, then I could unlearn it, and I did. I realized that I had all the tools I needed to start confronting my fear. Fear sneaks up on you unconsciously, so get to know it and make friends with it so you can be at peace. It will still be there, but what is different is that you can control the fear instead of the fear controlling you and you can stop the automatic response. I had also compared the physical pain from whatever medical procedure I was feeling to a very painful experience before I came to Mayo where I had with a spinal injection that was the highest level of pain I had ever experienced, enough pain that I was uncontrollably shaking and couldn't stop for a long time and I was getting zapped with frequent stabbing electric shock pains that started with the injection and went on for a few weeks. I used to pass out from much less and I was well on my way to that, but after that procedure, I began using visualization of a beautiful place with deep slow breathing and imagined music I loved, and I was able to stop myself from passing out, a true victory. In comparison, I can tell myself that other issues are not as bad as that and it takes some power away from the apprehension. The pain from my spine surgery and the recovery afterward was not even close to the pain I had experienced from the spinal injection, and I could tolerate my surgical recovery without any pain medication. I had the prescriptions, but never took any. I was a little surprised by that because I had imagined it would be much worse, and that also speaks to how well I had defeated my fears. Fear increases pain a lot. I had been using music and breathing and learned to lower my blood pressure and I did that anytime I got nervous about surgery, so it was easy to use that as a method to remain calm and in control at a time when I really needed it. That's how I started confronting my fears, and later I added in artwork and doing sketches of my doctor which lead to something wonderful for me and that became my Mayo patient story. You can design your own emotional therapy with whatever creative outlet works for you…. maybe that's a walk outside in nature, a pet, music, crafts… humor. I hope that helps, and you are not alone. We are here for you.

Jump to this post

@jenniferhunter. Wow. That's all I can say, just wow

REPLY
@parus

@jenniferhunter Thank you for your input. I have now started taking a small sketch pad with me everywhere I go that is scary for me. Due to spinal issues I am not able to draw and paint as I would like to be doing. My safe place. My support comes from connect members. Fear does increase pain. Having an anxiety disorder as well causes more challenges. Doctors/nurses
don't have the time to deal with these disorders and I understand. Takes a lot of psyching myself up to get to appointments.
at times I want to give up. I think about my 4 year old grandson and how he adores me. I then know I must keep trying.

Jump to this post

Grandchildren are worth living for, that is certain.

REPLY

My sister Gail says that grandchildren are the dividend for having had children. My dad would say that if he knew how much fun grandchildren would be, he would have had them first.

REPLY
@smilie

My sister Gail says that grandchildren are the dividend for having had children. My dad would say that if he knew how much fun grandchildren would be, he would have had them first.

Jump to this post

@smilie That is what my mother said. She spoiled her first grandchild something terrible! Not exactly sure how she treated the other 3.
Ginger

REPLY
@vickimurray

Dear @kimspr3, yes, ECT treatments are given in the same amounts as you remember. Some people take a treatment once a month forever. They swear it does a world of good for them, but I never noticed any good or bad affect. I only had about 4 or 5 sessions. I do understand that the process used to be much more brutal. My mother-in-law took treatments without sedation; it was awful. She forgot so many things; how to cook, her place in society and the world, and my father-in-law took care of her for the rest of her life. She because very religious (she was pretty devout even before, but she became scrupulous. I'm not making fun, but you had to be very, very careful what you did with her anointed palm because she burned it in the night when she was afraid. She was the sweetest of women, and she would do anything for you she was able; the same with my father-in-law. I was blessed to have them given the abuse in my own home. But back to ECT, I found it not to be helpful, but I met a young women during my process who believed she absolutely could not live without it. Same question involved with any treatment we have gone through in our lives – it works for some of us, not for others of us.

Jump to this post

Hello Vicki, Happy to know ECT is done HUMANLY. The memories are still with me. It was like the movie, One Flew Over the COCO's Nest. I don't think ECT did anything for me? So sad what happened to your Mother-in-law. Childhood friend was at the Facility at the same time. Surprised. She had different treatments [I just remembered this] We made a pact, after the treatments when I was brought to my room she would be there because I was so CONFUSED but she gave me, me. I can't explain well. What is anointed pain? It's nice to know you lived with people who cared. She lived in an abusive home, father! It turned out she had Schizophrenia. Her life was so sad. ECT is confusing to me, in others do they get their memory back or pieces of it? All the many treatments I had often wondered what damage was done if any? I can't believe I can speak about this part of my private life. Feels good. I appreciate your Post.

REPLY
@vickimurray

I have had several rounds of ECT, and it isn't possible to read or concentrate on something else. You are put to sleep with a little Propofol, then the electric current is run through your body for a few seconds, which induces a strong seizure. When you wake up, you will feel like someone walked on you. Every muscle in your body will hurt. Whether or not the ordeal is useful is up to each patient to decided. I don't think I got anything of value from the procedure. However, I have had one ketamine infusion, and I'm going for my second next week. It is supposed to help your pain, in my case, my back. I believe it has marginally. It also has therapeutic properties. I went to sleep and felt very relaxed for several days. Think it over. I will be glad to answer questions.

Jump to this post

Hello again, Ketamine Fusion? I have heard of it. Does Pain Management give you the fusion? I have been depressed all my life, one thing after another. PTSD and all the insecurities that crippled me. Tried to work always fired because of the fear of Authority Figures, I would freeze and now pain that was given to me. Ketamine can treat depression? Wonder if being kinda house bound it would help me?

REPLY
@peach414144

Dear Parus, this is peach. It is not your fault for having the trauma of ptsd. This comes from me peach who also has had PTSD since birth. My earliest recollection as a child was when I was approximately three years old. I woke up in a dark room on a bed, I was gasping for breath and chocking. I heard women's voices coming from another room. It was my grandmothers and my mothers voices. They were arguing. I smelled my grandmothers smell on the sheets. Now all was ok. My grandma was here. My mother tried to strangle me. This was only the beginning of a most terrible,terrible life. Both mental and physical torture and pain. And this goes even deeper than one can imagine. (I have always wanted to write a book about this.). It never stopped and went on until I ran away. I think being treated this way, at home, at work in the army at war, etc. This is the brain being whipped into submission with extreme pain. My story goes deep and I am sure this affects every other person under these many circumstances. Some how keep up your hope, pray, do anything to keep holding on. With the most endearing love for you, Peach

Jump to this post

Oh peach, Your post touched me deeply. I wish Could open up more. PTSD! Took so much from me. Maybe I could have made something of myself. My bother had it also but he was able to learn, get his Masters and just before he died he was going for his Doctorate. I always had a lot of interests but to scared to due anything about it because I failed at everything I did. Mentally I could not go through another failure. Discussing my mother, father, brother it feels like I'm betraying a trust. Crazy? Well having a cry, so ill close now

REPLY
@kimspr3

Oh peach, Your post touched me deeply. I wish Could open up more. PTSD! Took so much from me. Maybe I could have made something of myself. My bother had it also but he was able to learn, get his Masters and just before he died he was going for his Doctorate. I always had a lot of interests but to scared to due anything about it because I failed at everything I did. Mentally I could not go through another failure. Discussing my mother, father, brother it feels like I'm betraying a trust. Crazy? Well having a cry, so ill close now

Jump to this post

@kimspr3 Crying can be very good for you. It releases some stress hormones. You might feel exhausted but calmer afterwards, and thinks might seem clearer to you. I've heard saltwater is good for you: tears, sweat, and the ocean. Rest well tonight.
Ginger

REPLY
@gingerw

@kimspr3 Crying can be very good for you. It releases some stress hormones. You might feel exhausted but calmer afterwards, and thinks might seem clearer to you. I've heard saltwater is good for you: tears, sweat, and the ocean. Rest well tonight.
Ginger

Jump to this post

Ginger, Hello I'm sorry it took so long for me to respond. I'm very scared and depressed because of what happened to my spine due to surgeries. My always thoughts, it was given to me, I was not born with it. I liked your post so much. I think about your warm kind words.

REPLY
Please login or register to post a reply.