1. < Mental Health

~ Depressed and scared, not making it financially ~

Posted by Barb @amberpep, Feb 26, 2019

I'm 74 years old and moved 3 years ago from MD to VA. My girls had hounded me to come down for several years so I finally did it. I sold my condo (at a loss), and a job with a dentist. Well, here I am, and financially I'm just not making it. That amount I earned from the dentist covered me with just a little left over. Now, more than often, I don't have enough. I eeked out just enough for my rent this month, and now there's not even enough for a quart of milk. I get S.S. and what I get goes right out for my rent (usually there's enough), and my son sends me money each month. I'm sickened, depressed, and scared. I live in low income housing, and have a budget that practically squeaks. I'm thinking of starting to sell some of my furniture.
I so wish I'd have stayed in MD, for so many reasons, this being one of them. I have applied for oodles of jobs (they're all on line now), and legally they're not supposed to ask you how old you are (although many do), but they all ask when you graduated from either high school or college .... well, it doesn't take rocket science to figure out how old a person is. I'm so depressed about this, and .so upset that my stomach.constantly churns.
Thanks for letting me vent.
abby

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kimspr3 | @kimspr3 | Jul 7, 2019
In reply to @Erinmfs "Hi @amberpep , I was depressed and frightened too, I moved back into the community that..." + (show)
@Erinmfs

Hi @amberpep , I was depressed and frightened too, I moved back into the community that I grew up in, everyone I knew is gone, my family is now passed away, and I felt frightened and alone.

So, what I did was joined the local Elks club, I'm lucky to have it near my home. Elks are nationwide and I found the Virginia Elks website
https://www.virginiaelks.org/
The Elks are predominantly a group of retired people who party and socialize. I'm an officer now actually, and I attend lodge meetings 2 times a month. But you certainly don't need to become a member right away. I hope there is an Elks near you. We play euchre on Wednesday, we have a 4 table euchre tournament. We have dinners on Friday nights with a band, last night we had hot dogs and burgers. I feel somewhat out of place as I'm younger, but I found it vital to making new friends in my new area. I volunteer alot there, we had a nice car show that made the local news for example and I sold raffle tickets. The Elks sponsors service projects for veterans and youth. The facility is rented each weekend for wedding receptions.

If the Elks isn't near you, perhaps your community has a euchre club? we have a serious group of retirees who meet daily and play tournament euchre. They are always looking for players for euchre around here, it's alot of fun, I win occassionally, winner gets about $20.

my community also has a Center for Active Seniors , or CASI, it's called. There's a euchre game at CASI, and resources for lonely folks like us, I went there one time to ask about Medicare open enrollment, they have activities, lunch, classes. Maybe your community has one, many locals hang out at CASI here:
https://www.casiseniors.org/activities-and-events.php

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My Grandfather was a member of the Elks. Great group. I had fun there as a kid.

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Moderator
Lisa Lucier, Moderator | @lisalucier | Jul 12, 2019
In reply to @kdo0827 "It can be so frustrating trying to find something that will help. I’ve finally found that..." + (show)
@kdo0827

It can be so frustrating trying to find something that will help. I’ve finally found that a combination of Cymbalta and Adderral help. I still don’t have any desire to get out and go places but some of that is related to my chronic pain. Normally after I do get out I enjoy things but it’s like pulling teeth(I was a dental practice manager) to get me out. The Adderral has made a big difference in my energy level and it makes me feel good to accomplish things during my day. You’ve certainly had a lot to deal with. Have you tried Cymbalta or Adderral?

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Hi, @kdo0827 - thanks for the information on the new combination of medications, the Duloxetine (Cymbalta) and adderall, that is helping you. Have you been able to get out of the house some this past week?

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smilie | @smilie | Jul 15, 2019
In reply to @gingerw "@smilie You have quite a legacy to keep up then! I looked up the corn plant,..." + (show)
@gingerw

@smilie You have quite a legacy to keep up then! I looked up the corn plant, and would like to get one, except it isn't friendly to cats. Pretty sure my cat would not leave it alone.
Ginger

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Hi! I’m suffering this morning from depression and anxiety. I had breakfast, I took my pills and just now I took a second Ativan. I’m half dressed and I have things to do, which I did start, like laundry. I’m lying down again and I don’t have the will and energy to move. In fact I want to slam my head into a wall!!!!

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2 replies
Mentor
Ginger, Volunteer Mentor | @gingerw | Jul 15, 2019
In reply to @smilie "Hi! I’m suffering this morning from depression and anxiety. I had breakfast, I took my pills..." + (show)
@smilie

Hi! I’m suffering this morning from depression and anxiety. I had breakfast, I took my pills and just now I took a second Ativan. I’m half dressed and I have things to do, which I did start, like laundry. I’m lying down again and I don’t have the will and energy to move. In fact I want to slam my head into a wall!!!!

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@smilie do you have a friend you can call? Have you figured out what the source of your depression and anxiety is this morning? If you're like me you don't want your laundry sitting in the washer after it gets done, so put the timer on and go move it to the dryer when it's finished. That gives you something to think about for the next 45 minutes or an hour. And after the clothes are dry in the dryer take them out and fold/hang them up, put them away. That takes care of the next little bit. Then go check your plant and see how it's doing. Go outside and feel the sun on your face, and take a bit of a walk, even just five minutes. I guarantee you will feel better just moving around. And I really want to thank you for checking in with us this morning to let us know how you are feeling. We really do care for you here.
Ginger

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dianrib | @dianrib | Jul 15, 2019

I feel your pain I've had those days. Its incredibly difficult to even move. what can I say Meds have their limits. Spend time with friends. Do some simple exercise...A short walk . Do you have someone to talk to ? Sure hope so. Its a tough world out there Love, pain, sadness at different times of our lives.. Good luck

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Barb | @amberpep | Jul 15, 2019

Thanks dianrib ..... I just got into a group through the new Psychiatrist I found since I moved ..... it's called DBT .... Dialectical Behavior Therapy. I wouldn't want to have to take it without therapy first, but for me with 12 years of therapy in Frederick ...... it was really helpful. Right now my daughters are helping me find another place to live. My apartment is nice, but the environment is terrible ..... crime ridden. The building across from me is know as a crack house, little children wander around unsupervised, and not a day goes by without at least 2 police cars being called due to some sort of problem. We have found a really nice place for seniors, which is basically single story homes, attached by a breezeway to the next house, and so on. My daughters talked to some of the residents and they love it. So I'm on their waiting list but it could be a year or more. That's OK .... just knowing there will be a change is satisfying. The other day a little child - maybe 2 or 2-1/2 was wandering down the sidewalk, bottle in his mouth, calling "Mommy, Mommy." Little wonder the kids nowadays are so disrespectful and have no guidance or motivation.
abby

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dianrib | @dianrib | Jul 15, 2019

Great you have a place to look forward too Your area sounds dangerous. Careful. hate to see kids or pets ignored or mistreated. I am thru with phychiatrits all they have for me is Drugs . On xanax trying to get off get sick when I miss a day . Too many drugs legal & not.

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kimspr3 | @kimspr3 | Jul 19, 2019
In reply to @smilie "Hi! I’m suffering this morning from depression and anxiety. I had breakfast, I took my pills..." + (show)
@smilie

Hi! I’m suffering this morning from depression and anxiety. I had breakfast, I took my pills and just now I took a second Ativan. I’m half dressed and I have things to do, which I did start, like laundry. I’m lying down again and I don’t have the will and energy to move. In fact I want to slam my head into a wall!!!!

Jump to this post

I just came across your post but may I ask, are you feeling better?

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Barb | @amberpep | Jul 19, 2019

Yes, I'm definitely better, but typical of Bipolar 2, it's up and down, up and down. The up's aren't very "up" just probably ore normal. I'm looking forward to moving, but it won't be for one or two years. It's in a town about 7 miles from here in a senior setup. They're small single story houses attached by a breezeway. I've adjusted to living here about as much as I think I will ..... still, if someone said they'd pay for me to go back I'd be right on it. But, it's not to be, so here I am.
abby

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