Earliest signs of decline?

Hi:
My husband's diagnosis came a few years after we retired, but when we retired I started noticing that things started to be more and more about him, and his ego became front and center. I thought this was just his new retirement personality, then others started to notice that he wanted all of our attention and pushed till he got it.
I later read in a dementia book that the egotistical behavior is because they are so focused on keeping it together and maintaining that semblance of 'normal'. Now I know why it's all about him.

@judimahoney
Hello Judi,
Thank you for sharing this. I also noticed and continue to observe very “self-involved” behaviors. I do understand that it comes from a place of needing to control “what’s left”. Of course it must be very frightening to feel so lost, so focusing on what they can (themselves) probably is a way of self-soothing. I do have a lot of compassion, but I just wish she had let us know early on. A family friend told me she knew about a diagnosis years ago.

It might’ve helped us navigate this better. Or maybe not.

Gotta take the small wins. For example, I found a dry shampoo that works wonders on her hair (she’s bathing resistant).

Sending you lots of supportive energy and hugs. 🤗

@gratia
And my husband also has anosognosia, so he doesn't know what he's lost (no self awareness). I guess this is a blessing? 🤔

@gratia Yes, finding joy in the little things......and finding dry shampoo that works wonders. You hit a home run for you and Mom.
Best, Karla (your nature shots are just beautiful)

@gratia Great idea about using dry shampoo. What brand is it?

Good morning ☀️
I’m happy to share- the dry shampoo I found is Kitch volumizing rice protein dry shampoo for men & women. I ordered the ‘invisible’ version. It’s travel size, it worked for us. Some reviews say that it has a scent, but the one I got is unscented. Which was really important to us.

Like I said … it’s the small wins. Today I’m trying new undergarment for my mom. Hope this works! The current incontinent undies have a strong elastic which can dig into sensitive skin. (I wonder if these things are biodegradable or are there mountains of disposable briefs everywhere? 😲)

As frustrating as all of this is, we want our loved ones to feel safe, comfortable and dignified.

Sending strength and hope🤗❤️✨

@kjc48 Good Morning Karla 🌞I’m glad you enjoy the photos. Seeing natural beauty can lift our spirits. Wishing you a calm day and moments of joy🤗❤️

@gratia Thank you, I think you should do freelance photography on the side - although with your MOM I'm sure there's very little time left. It's just that you're so good with these shots, and you might find solace in freelancing. Plus others get to benefit from your work! Best, Karla (yes, natural beauty does help uplift our spirits, obviously a natural gift you have in taking these shots!)

It's a fine line. There is "normal" decline with age (evaporating dendrites) and there are clinical beginnings and signs. If we get scared, and start bringing to attention little slips as mci, we'll end up fighting, which probably speeds decline.
Reserve conclusions until it starts to become clear that this is a prodromal clinical situation and not him being frustrating as he's always been, if not a little more frustrating. Ask my wife.

@gratia I remember on a previous post from Bill, about "The Calvary is Not Coming" - in fact he had a few posts I read, he mentions, the best incontinent undergarments he used for his wife, in his fight against her dementia journey. I just quickly looked in my ream of printed off Mayo Connect paper (that I save) to see if I could find it. It was a very helpful list. I couldn't find it and I'm not sure how to pull Bill's posts back up on this site. Maybe the mentors know if you need another under garment solution for her sensitive skin.
If I find it in my printed stack, I'll reach back out.
Best, Karla