@parus this poem is perfect. Would that my clothing match the wall paint or wallpaper so I could disappear in to it. Sitting with my back to a wall. Usually in a corner, to see all comers. Head buried in a book, pen with journal, or crochet hook in hand, to not have to deal with the others also there. My senses on high alert, every noise seems to be very pronounced, every smell even more so. The place doesn't matter, doctor office, auto repair, etc. My anxiety goes through the roof, and they wonder why my blood pressure skyrockets.
Ginger
Dear Gingerw: Oh yes. Everything you have said and more. Trying to keep my mind busy by looking at each persons shoes, their dress code. Feeling sorry for some poor people or disfigured ones. Apprehensively waiting to be called. Paranoia steps in saying who has been called before me. Then why have I been placed in this room and have waited for a longer time. But, I will keep my cool and not allow them to see my aprehension and smile with a nice hello. What I really mean cannot be said here. However, remember not all of the health care workers are the same. I am sorry for the well meaning ones.
Re PTSD in general: A soldier with PTSD suggested I buy the book THE PTSD WORKBOOK, by Mary Beth Williams. I did, from Amazon. 7 months ago. I opened it. Once. Placed it by my bed. There it sits. I'm not in touch with that soldier now. Has anyone here worked this workbook? Any feedback and motivation is welcome.
Re PTSD in general: A soldier with PTSD suggested I buy the book THE PTSD WORKBOOK, by Mary Beth Williams. I did, from Amazon. 7 months ago. I opened it. Once. Placed it by my bed. There it sits. I'm not in touch with that soldier now. Has anyone here worked this workbook? Any feedback and motivation is welcome.
Hi, @stlouisgmajenn - that's interesting about the PTSD workbook a soldier suggested to you. I'm guessing others in this discussion might be interested in whether it's helpful to you. Have you gotten a chance to do any more of it?
@parus, I see that you had mentioned your PTSD in a few other discussions, but if you are comfortable, is there something specific about PTSD you would like to share with the other members on Connect? Or maybe a particular aspect of PTSD that you would like to discuss?
Three and a half years ago I was in a catastrophic car accident. I was air lifted to the nearest regional trauma center. I had many injuries but the worst was a TBI with brain bleeds. Since then I have struggled with dizziness, anxiety, depression and PTSD. The most recent episodes happened on a motor trip to Montana. I get dizzy and car sick while driving and my startle response is greatly exaggerated. Anything that looks threatening causes me to jolt, cry out and my arms fly up and shake. There have been instances when We have driven by an accident scene, I scream several times and then sob. It all comes back.
Three and a half years ago I was in a catastrophic car accident. I was air lifted to the nearest regional trauma center. I had many injuries but the worst was a TBI with brain bleeds. Since then I have struggled with dizziness, anxiety, depression and PTSD. The most recent episodes happened on a motor trip to Montana. I get dizzy and car sick while driving and my startle response is greatly exaggerated. Anything that looks threatening causes me to jolt, cry out and my arms fly up and shake. There have been instances when We have driven by an accident scene, I scream several times and then sob. It all comes back.
Brain injuries are the worst. I've been in a few bad wrecks, most bones broken or smashed. But the worst damage is my head. And the PTSD triggers. There are so many. My last true trauma was 15 years ago. Was a city health inspector, got caught in a gang thing, Crips vs Bloods, held at gunpoint. But they decided to let me go after a while, I think because I was helping one of the gangbanger's boys recover from lead poisoning. But I've never been the same. Lots of counseling. Had to quit work. Even after all these years I can't identify all my triggers. I hide. I'm afraid to venture outside. And I suffer from shingles, a nasty nerve disorder from chicken pox. I'd like to tell you that your life will improve, but it may not. I am productive tho. I write to our USA troops serving overseas, hand paint cards and envelopes. I cuddle my cats. My best friend lives just nextdoor and she feeds me. She's 200 pounds, I'm 120. She likes to cook, so I eat. I don't pretend that I'm OK anymore, cause I'm not. I'm damaged. But I feel safe in my house, so I stay in my house. Order groceries and pet food online. Best wishes to you
Three and a half years ago I was in a catastrophic car accident. I was air lifted to the nearest regional trauma center. I had many injuries but the worst was a TBI with brain bleeds. Since then I have struggled with dizziness, anxiety, depression and PTSD. The most recent episodes happened on a motor trip to Montana. I get dizzy and car sick while driving and my startle response is greatly exaggerated. Anything that looks threatening causes me to jolt, cry out and my arms fly up and shake. There have been instances when We have driven by an accident scene, I scream several times and then sob. It all comes back.
I am so sorry to hear these struggles. I have had PTSD for close to 8 years now. Is there any medication that you can take that will calm down your startle responses so that you can try and gain more control? Have you tried Hemp Oil? It helps with my anxiety a great deal.
Re PTSD in general: A soldier with PTSD suggested I buy the book THE PTSD WORKBOOK, by Mary Beth Williams. I did, from Amazon. 7 months ago. I opened it. Once. Placed it by my bed. There it sits. I'm not in touch with that soldier now. Has anyone here worked this workbook? Any feedback and motivation is welcome.
Where is the work book for the person who as a child was never told "I love you", tossed into the wall by her hair, beaten, starved. Never held tenderly and told they are good for nothing ?. What helped me was to carefully watch the actions and words of these persons (my family members). Uncaring bullies nasty people who are as uncaring as their nature. They are never told this is not the way. To me they are enjoying the hurt. Break the dinner dishes over their heads, not mine. My way of life is to be kind to others, to do whatever I can to help in as many ways as possible. And watch out for these people. They are around. and live your now life with a smile.
This is just awful. There is no workbook or guide for these horrors. I guess for those who have been abused the only way is to do your best to live and don't repeat what happened to you. We humans are just a failure of a species.
Disassociation happens when a person separates himself, his thoughts and sense of identity from reality. It happens when there is huge stress. You disconnect from surroundings and feelings. It actually is a defense mechanism so that you can feel less afraid, less pain, less suffering. It is a blocking of emotional pain as a way of self-preservation. For example- if your are very stressed and upset and bury yourself on or in your bed to escape your mental anguish- you separate yourself- dis- associate, stop associating with life.
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Dear Gingerw: Oh yes. Everything you have said and more. Trying to keep my mind busy by looking at each persons shoes, their dress code. Feeling sorry for some poor people or disfigured ones. Apprehensively waiting to be called. Paranoia steps in saying who has been called before me. Then why have I been placed in this room and have waited for a longer time. But, I will keep my cool and not allow them to see my aprehension and smile with a nice hello. What I really mean cannot be said here. However, remember not all of the health care workers are the same. I am sorry for the well meaning ones.
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2 ReactionsRe PTSD in general: A soldier with PTSD suggested I buy the book THE PTSD WORKBOOK, by Mary Beth Williams. I did, from Amazon. 7 months ago. I opened it. Once. Placed it by my bed. There it sits. I'm not in touch with that soldier now. Has anyone here worked this workbook? Any feedback and motivation is welcome.
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3 ReactionsHi, @stlouisgmajenn - that's interesting about the PTSD workbook a soldier suggested to you. I'm guessing others in this discussion might be interested in whether it's helpful to you. Have you gotten a chance to do any more of it?
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1 ReactionThree and a half years ago I was in a catastrophic car accident. I was air lifted to the nearest regional trauma center. I had many injuries but the worst was a TBI with brain bleeds. Since then I have struggled with dizziness, anxiety, depression and PTSD. The most recent episodes happened on a motor trip to Montana. I get dizzy and car sick while driving and my startle response is greatly exaggerated. Anything that looks threatening causes me to jolt, cry out and my arms fly up and shake. There have been instances when We have driven by an accident scene, I scream several times and then sob. It all comes back.
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Helpful -
Hug
1 Reactionwhat is disassociating? I'm learning so much here. Thanks 2 everyone 4 educating me. Please explain disassociating
Brain injuries are the worst. I've been in a few bad wrecks, most bones broken or smashed. But the worst damage is my head. And the PTSD triggers. There are so many. My last true trauma was 15 years ago. Was a city health inspector, got caught in a gang thing, Crips vs Bloods, held at gunpoint. But they decided to let me go after a while, I think because I was helping one of the gangbanger's boys recover from lead poisoning. But I've never been the same. Lots of counseling. Had to quit work. Even after all these years I can't identify all my triggers. I hide. I'm afraid to venture outside. And I suffer from shingles, a nasty nerve disorder from chicken pox. I'd like to tell you that your life will improve, but it may not. I am productive tho. I write to our USA troops serving overseas, hand paint cards and envelopes. I cuddle my cats. My best friend lives just nextdoor and she feeds me. She's 200 pounds, I'm 120. She likes to cook, so I eat. I don't pretend that I'm OK anymore, cause I'm not. I'm damaged. But I feel safe in my house, so I stay in my house. Order groceries and pet food online. Best wishes to you
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Helpful -
Hug
3 ReactionsI am so sorry to hear these struggles. I have had PTSD for close to 8 years now. Is there any medication that you can take that will calm down your startle responses so that you can try and gain more control? Have you tried Hemp Oil? It helps with my anxiety a great deal.
Where is the work book for the person who as a child was never told "I love you", tossed into the wall by her hair, beaten, starved. Never held tenderly and told they are good for nothing ?. What helped me was to carefully watch the actions and words of these persons (my family members). Uncaring bullies nasty people who are as uncaring as their nature. They are never told this is not the way. To me they are enjoying the hurt. Break the dinner dishes over their heads, not mine. My way of life is to be kind to others, to do whatever I can to help in as many ways as possible. And watch out for these people. They are around. and live your now life with a smile.
-
Like -
Helpful -
Hug
2 ReactionsThis is just awful. There is no workbook or guide for these horrors. I guess for those who have been abused the only way is to do your best to live and don't repeat what happened to you. We humans are just a failure of a species.
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Like -
Helpful -
Hug
1 ReactionDisassociation happens when a person separates himself, his thoughts and sense of identity from reality. It happens when there is huge stress. You disconnect from surroundings and feelings. It actually is a defense mechanism so that you can feel less afraid, less pain, less suffering. It is a blocking of emotional pain as a way of self-preservation. For example- if your are very stressed and upset and bury yourself on or in your bed to escape your mental anguish- you separate yourself- dis- associate, stop associating with life.
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Like -
Helpful -
Hug
3 Reactions