Selfharm

Posted by Ryman @ryman, Jun 30, 2017

I assume this is the right group. I have never discussed this with anyone but my grandson yells at me about it. When I get very stressed, I sometimes scratch my arms or face. I haven't done any real harm. It is a way to relieve stress when it gets to be too much. I cannot tolerate anxiety or depression medicines which I assume would be a doctor's answer. Does anyone else deal with this?

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Hi teresa...thanks so much for not forgetting me. That actually means a lot. It may seem strange...all the cyberspace stuff, but for those of us who are isolated it is helpful. Inam struggling quite a bit. I am going over all my son's texts from the last several months before he killed himself and where he explained his plans. I think i am just trying to find answers where there are none.. I am working up to even calling his psychistrist who i saw at his funeral. More later.

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@georgette12

To add to that last post.....i do have to chime in and gently and firmly invite you to make it a priority to investigate healing techniques before you inadvertently do some damage. My instinct says that you just aren't gonna try more meds and see more doctors. I have definitely been there. I so get that.
For thousands of years people have used alternative means to get well. Think of it as a research project. Try different stuff. Until you find what works.

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@ryman

Physical issues certainly effect my depression. Pain and so on aren't the only causes, but there's a definite connection. My wife is very tired of all of my illnesses, including depression. She has said I need to figure out how to get over it. That surely doesn't help, does it.

Jim

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@georgette12

To add to that last post.....i do have to chime in and gently and firmly invite you to make it a priority to investigate healing techniques before you inadvertently do some damage. My instinct says that you just aren't gonna try more meds and see more doctors. I have definitely been there. I so get that.
For thousands of years people have used alternative means to get well. Think of it as a research project. Try different stuff. Until you find what works.

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Jim, don't you just love it when others tell us to get over it? They just don't get it. Depression is like other diseases and we can't just get over it. I really hope being here and talking with others in the same boat helps. It helps me to go out ALONE for awhile each day to have lunch and do anything else I may find interesting. Also maybe a small hobby that you would like. I've recently setup a new fish aquarium. It is very relaxing and beautiful. Don't forget to exercise. Maybe join a fitness center or a group of walkers. Also try to eat well. It's all tied into together. Wishing you the best!

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@georgette12

Hi teresa...thanks so much for not forgetting me. That actually means a lot. It may seem strange...all the cyberspace stuff, but for those of us who are isolated it is helpful. Inam struggling quite a bit. I am going over all my son's texts from the last several months before he killed himself and where he explained his plans. I think i am just trying to find answers where there are none.. I am working up to even calling his psychistrist who i saw at his funeral. More later.

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Georgette, I may have written before, I can't remember. I just want to say I can think of nothing more difficult than losing a loved one to suicide. I lost a son to illness and that was hard. I will say a prayer that God will grant you peace and healing. Lean on Him, He loves us and understands. Hope this is a better week for you. Blessings.

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@georgette12

To add to that last post.....i do have to chime in and gently and firmly invite you to make it a priority to investigate healing techniques before you inadvertently do some damage. My instinct says that you just aren't gonna try more meds and see more doctors. I have definitely been there. I so get that.
For thousands of years people have used alternative means to get well. Think of it as a research project. Try different stuff. Until you find what works.

Jump to this post

No, it sure doesn't help to be told to get over it. I realize many people don't understand. I know I make it worse by worrying about what it does to my family and what they think. Just another piece of the problem to deal with.it is good to have a place like this where we can talk to people who know what it is really like. There are a lot of good suggestions on here that I hope to try.

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@danybegood1

@ryman, hi. Sorry if im butting in. About 27 years ago i was peeling the skin off of the bottom of my feet. I think i just have the tendency if that's possible. In high school i was tapping my fingertips on things, my body, desk, tablets, other people's hands, whatever. lol. I still do. I added counting letters, syllables, music beats, things like that. As a mom, i added checking the window and door locks, making sure the stove burners were off. I haven't gotten to the hand washing yet, i dont think. But thats just good hygiene. The only thing that made me stop with my feet was the pain i inflicted on myself. I bled and the pain could be bad enough that it was hard to walk. So i finally stopped. Right now iam having a problem with an all over itch that started about 15 years ago. Ive been drawing blood, and its leaving scabs. Well,. ive been scraping them off, drawing more blood, etc. Now im getting scars. Ive been complaining about the itching for this whole time. The doctors have not been impressed. And this last doctor I am seeing doesnt care either. She called it something else, but i know what's causing it and i told her. She wants me to see a therapist, and i want to but there are other doctors i need to see first. Transportation costs are killing me. Aside from the disfigurement of my body, this is serious stuff for me because im diabetic. I could get a serious infection. I hope you are able to find a good stress .reliever. Im assuming its stress. Im sure that's what it is with me. Best of luck to the both of us. Have a good evening, Diane (Judy, Diane, Dani)

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Sounds like OCD to me. If you could get to UCLA in Westwood - they can help. One of the few places in the US that has made OCD a speciality. Also, you may find the UK has studied this also.
Look up books by Dr. J. Swartz from UCLA. Try diff Spellings.

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@danybegood1

@ryman, hi. Sorry if im butting in. About 27 years ago i was peeling the skin off of the bottom of my feet. I think i just have the tendency if that's possible. In high school i was tapping my fingertips on things, my body, desk, tablets, other people's hands, whatever. lol. I still do. I added counting letters, syllables, music beats, things like that. As a mom, i added checking the window and door locks, making sure the stove burners were off. I haven't gotten to the hand washing yet, i dont think. But thats just good hygiene. The only thing that made me stop with my feet was the pain i inflicted on myself. I bled and the pain could be bad enough that it was hard to walk. So i finally stopped. Right now iam having a problem with an all over itch that started about 15 years ago. Ive been drawing blood, and its leaving scabs. Well,. ive been scraping them off, drawing more blood, etc. Now im getting scars. Ive been complaining about the itching for this whole time. The doctors have not been impressed. And this last doctor I am seeing doesnt care either. She called it something else, but i know what's causing it and i told her. She wants me to see a therapist, and i want to but there are other doctors i need to see first. Transportation costs are killing me. Aside from the disfigurement of my body, this is serious stuff for me because im diabetic. I could get a serious infection. I hope you are able to find a good stress .reliever. Im assuming its stress. Im sure that's what it is with me. Best of luck to the both of us. Have a good evening, Diane (Judy, Diane, Dani)

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@mari, I appreciate your post, the correct spelling of his name is Jeffrey M. Schwartz, M.D. (I googled him). It looks like he has several books - I have not read any so I cannot make any recommendations. Have you read any of his books? Teresa

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@danybegood1

@ryman, hi. Sorry if im butting in. About 27 years ago i was peeling the skin off of the bottom of my feet. I think i just have the tendency if that's possible. In high school i was tapping my fingertips on things, my body, desk, tablets, other people's hands, whatever. lol. I still do. I added counting letters, syllables, music beats, things like that. As a mom, i added checking the window and door locks, making sure the stove burners were off. I haven't gotten to the hand washing yet, i dont think. But thats just good hygiene. The only thing that made me stop with my feet was the pain i inflicted on myself. I bled and the pain could be bad enough that it was hard to walk. So i finally stopped. Right now iam having a problem with an all over itch that started about 15 years ago. Ive been drawing blood, and its leaving scabs. Well,. ive been scraping them off, drawing more blood, etc. Now im getting scars. Ive been complaining about the itching for this whole time. The doctors have not been impressed. And this last doctor I am seeing doesnt care either. She called it something else, but i know what's causing it and i told her. She wants me to see a therapist, and i want to but there are other doctors i need to see first. Transportation costs are killing me. Aside from the disfigurement of my body, this is serious stuff for me because im diabetic. I could get a serious infection. I hope you are able to find a good stress .reliever. Im assuming its stress. Im sure that's what it is with me. Best of luck to the both of us. Have a good evening, Diane (Judy, Diane, Dani)

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I am familiar with his work. What city r u in? Most Drs. would not have a clue about how to help w OCD.

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@georgette12

To add to that last post.....i do have to chime in and gently and firmly invite you to make it a priority to investigate healing techniques before you inadvertently do some damage. My instinct says that you just aren't gonna try more meds and see more doctors. I have definitely been there. I so get that.
For thousands of years people have used alternative means to get well. Think of it as a research project. Try different stuff. Until you find what works.

Jump to this post

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Hi @ryman, Georgette mentions seeking out healing techniques. I thought you might find the suggestions in the Mayo Clinic article about managing self-injury a good place to start: http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/self-injury/manage/ptc-20165430. You'll notice that you're already doing one of the tips (very well, I might add). The article suggests: "Connect with others who can support you so you don't feel alone."

I also like the advice to "Take care of yourself," although that one is probably easier said than done. Do you exercise or practice relaxation techniques? What do you do for yourself and just for you?

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