When plans change because of health issues. How do you cope?

Posted by Ginger, Volunteer Mentor @gingerw, Mar 9 10:13am

As a society, we look forward to our vacations, or trips, or social outlets and activities. What happens when we have to modify or cancel those plans, because of a health concern, or our own illness?

Recently I decided to cancel a planned for and highly anticipated trip, due to concerns over exposure to crowds and the coronavirus. I live in a very small rural town, and even heading to the closest “big city”, that is only about 20,000 people. I had made travel plans last August, for this March, that’s a sign of how excited I was. But I deal everyday with immune system issues, and just cannot justify to myself the risk involved. So, I will stay home, and work on my creative endeavors alone, and “watch” through social media, rather than be in a room with 50 other people from all over the country. Waiting to hear if my payments made will be refunded in whole, or not.

What have you had to change? How has your mindset been modified in light of your own health issues? How have you handled the request of an employer to do a business trip that might take you far away? If your plans include young children, how do you explain to them, how things might be different? With Spring vacations/trips looming on the near future, what will you do instead?

@gingerw
As you know, we did cancel a much anticipated vacation to the Caribbean, we should be there now, but just felt it was not worth the risk. We canceled despite not knowing if we will get any of the money we paid in advance for our hotel and our airfares refunded. We did purchase travel insurance but this is a grey area. If you buy the CFAR (Cancel For Any Reason) option it would be covered but CFAR is quite a bit more money and we never even thought of that as being something we would need. The travel insurance may consider the cancellation to be purely our choice in which case it is not covered. If they accept the letter from my transplant team telling them that I was advised not to travel we may be covered. If our insurance does not reimburse us the hotel has given us a credit that we can use if we go there within a year, but who is to say if we will be able to. Travel insurance also does not generally cover epidemics and pandemics. I don't think Coronavirus has been labeled as such yet.

I think this article might be a help to people struggling with the question of whether or not to cancel.

This question is one many of us do not think about.
"Would your regret be manageable if you or a family member caught COVID-19?"
We did think of it, not for family but considering ourselves since we don't have family close by who might be exposed if we caught it, but since we are both well beyond 60 and I am immunosuppressed we are within the at-risk group.
https://www.medicinenet.com/script/main/art.asp
JK

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@contentandwell
I watched a meeting with the president and airline executives yesterday I think, The airline representatives said they were loosening restrictions because of the virus. Hopefully that means returning any money or at least a credit until this mess is over with. If this Isn’t over with in a year maybe the hotel will change it’s policy accordingly.
My fingers are crossed for you,
Jake

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@contentandwell

@gingerw
As you know, we did cancel a much anticipated vacation to the Caribbean, we should be there now, but just felt it was not worth the risk. We canceled despite not knowing if we will get any of the money we paid in advance for our hotel and our airfares refunded. We did purchase travel insurance but this is a grey area. If you buy the CFAR (Cancel For Any Reason) option it would be covered but CFAR is quite a bit more money and we never even thought of that as being something we would need. The travel insurance may consider the cancellation to be purely our choice in which case it is not covered. If they accept the letter from my transplant team telling them that I was advised not to travel we may be covered. If our insurance does not reimburse us the hotel has given us a credit that we can use if we go there within a year, but who is to say if we will be able to. Travel insurance also does not generally cover epidemics and pandemics. I don't think Coronavirus has been labeled as such yet.

I think this article might be a help to people struggling with the question of whether or not to cancel.

This question is one many of us do not think about.
"Would your regret be manageable if you or a family member caught COVID-19?"
We did think of it, not for family but considering ourselves since we don't have family close by who might be exposed if we caught it, but since we are both well beyond 60 and I am immunosuppressed we are within the at-risk group.
https://www.medicinenet.com/script/main/art.asp
JK

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@contentandwell I think the link was not complete. I did not access anything…
Yes, having to cancel an anticipated trip was surely disappointing. Can you use your imagination to create a stay-cation and decorate your house in the manner of where you would have gone? Have a meal themed like your destination? Take a day or two and do something similar to what you may have participated in at your destination?
Ginger

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@gingerw What a good topic for right now. I don't have any travel plans till Oct and by then we hope this is over with. I stay in right now and go to store when I need to also Dr.s . Just learned we have 3 cases here where I live but they are self contained and 1 in hospital .

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@lioness

@gingerw What a good topic for right now. I don't have any travel plans till Oct and by then we hope this is over with. I stay in right now and go to store when I need to also Dr.s . Just learned we have 3 cases here where I live but they are self contained and 1 in hospital .

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@lioness My sister lives about 5 miles from the nursing home in Seattle area, where there have been so many cases. She has related how her daily activity has changed for now, and the businesses/schools/places of worship also.

Just tonight, at the city council meeting, the coronavirus was brought up. People are fairly blase about it, as we are in a very small [less that 900 people] town. The general concensus [sp?] is to follow the normal winter/spring precautions of washing your hands, and stay home if you are sick.

As someone with a wacky immune system, I attempt to monitor myself and places I visit at any time, just am "stepping it up" a bit.

Take care of yourself, and please let us know what you see for changes in the way your senior living complex is taken care of, in light of the cases around you.
Ginger

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@gingerw Thanks Ginger Im trying to You too take care of yourself we all have to take this serious but there are a lot of people who are still blasé . We have more housekeeping being done ,posting on the board about how to take care of yourself ,we will be having a meeting so to hear more about what the company is going to do . I hope your sister is alright . Praying for us all.

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@gingerw

@contentandwell I think the link was not complete. I did not access anything…
Yes, having to cancel an anticipated trip was surely disappointing. Can you use your imagination to create a stay-cation and decorate your house in the manner of where you would have gone? Have a meal themed like your destination? Take a day or two and do something similar to what you may have participated in at your destination?
Ginger

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@jakedduck1 The airline we were booked on is American and they have issued a policy for flights booked after 03.01 I believe, no help for us. I booked in February. United as issued a more generous policy. If we cannot get our travel insurance to pay then I think American will give us a credit toward future flights. Right now we are just working on getting our travel insurance to pay since we canceled on the advice of my healthcare team.
The hotel is an independent hotel, not part of a chain. I think the credit they gave us toward a future stay if we go there within a year is as far as they will go. I had to pay three days non-refundable so that is what they credited us. Nice, but who really knows what the next year will be bring, particularly as we get older. I can just see myself, really sick or something, saying to my kids "use the hotel credit"!

@gingerw
I am inserting the link again. It did work for me but maybe something got left off in the posting.
https://www.medicinenet.com/script/main/art.asp?articlekey=228732&ecd=mnl_day_030920
I basically have little or no imagination and zero creativity. We are OK just living our regular daily lives though. Some people might appreciate the little touches you mention but they really are not things that we would find to be a worthwhile substitute. Thanks though, I appreciate the suggestions.
JK

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@gingerw
My entire family and myself had made travel arrangements for Ireland and Scotland the end of May. My son and daughter in law planned an additional visit to Italy and Spain. We were to meet up in Ireland to celebrate my daughters 25th wedding anniversary , one of my grandsons 21st birthday in early
June and my youngest grandsons high school graduation. Luckily all refunds have been made and now they are planning a trip to NC and SC. Hopefully next year we will be able to visit Ireland and Scotland. My son in law had always talked about going to Ireland for their 25th wedding anniversary and all the kids were so excited. We’ll make our own good times elsewhere. Much debate about this when the coronavirus first came upon the scene and I was the first one to say “no way am I going”.

FL Mary

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@imallears

@gingerw
My entire family and myself had made travel arrangements for Ireland and Scotland the end of May. My son and daughter in law planned an additional visit to Italy and Spain. We were to meet up in Ireland to celebrate my daughters 25th wedding anniversary , one of my grandsons 21st birthday in early
June and my youngest grandsons high school graduation. Luckily all refunds have been made and now they are planning a trip to NC and SC. Hopefully next year we will be able to visit Ireland and Scotland. My son in law had always talked about going to Ireland for their 25th wedding anniversary and all the kids were so excited. We’ll make our own good times elsewhere. Much debate about this when the coronavirus first came upon the scene and I was the first one to say “no way am I going”.

FL Mary

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@imallears Last night I spoke with my husband, who is currently 800 miles away, working his last few weeks before retirement and closing escrow on his condo. He is supposed to return to his job as a temporary contract engineer, and work on developing new product, starting in May, in three to five week chinks. He talked to the HR department yesterday about how this COVID-19 will affect these plans. He is a kidney transplant recipient. Rather than flying he may opt to drive back and forth.

Your precaution created disappointment, no doubt, but more peace of mind.
Ginger

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@imallears

@gingerw
My entire family and myself had made travel arrangements for Ireland and Scotland the end of May. My son and daughter in law planned an additional visit to Italy and Spain. We were to meet up in Ireland to celebrate my daughters 25th wedding anniversary , one of my grandsons 21st birthday in early
June and my youngest grandsons high school graduation. Luckily all refunds have been made and now they are planning a trip to NC and SC. Hopefully next year we will be able to visit Ireland and Scotland. My son in law had always talked about going to Ireland for their 25th wedding anniversary and all the kids were so excited. We’ll make our own good times elsewhere. Much debate about this when the coronavirus first came upon the scene and I was the first one to say “no way am I going”.

FL Mary

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@imallers Sorry you can't go this year but you where wise to postpone your trip . I would love to see Ireland but can only dream of it . Just do something at home to keep the feeling of Ireland and all maybe you can get or have a DVD on the places you want to visit .

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@imallears

@gingerw
My entire family and myself had made travel arrangements for Ireland and Scotland the end of May. My son and daughter in law planned an additional visit to Italy and Spain. We were to meet up in Ireland to celebrate my daughters 25th wedding anniversary , one of my grandsons 21st birthday in early
June and my youngest grandsons high school graduation. Luckily all refunds have been made and now they are planning a trip to NC and SC. Hopefully next year we will be able to visit Ireland and Scotland. My son in law had always talked about going to Ireland for their 25th wedding anniversary and all the kids were so excited. We’ll make our own good times elsewhere. Much debate about this when the coronavirus first came upon the scene and I was the first one to say “no way am I going”.

FL Mary

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@imallears That's great that you were able to get the money refunded. I hope everyone realized it was the only thing to do, to cancel. We still do not know what if any we will get back from our travel insurance but as my husband said, our health is more important than a few thousand dollars.
JK

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@gingerw, I have had to ask for help. My spouse is in isolation with MRSA here at hospital. My daughtwr is in ICU for the third week.

I have had to change my entire life, my whole routine, to be there for my loved ones. My life in community service has come
to a screeching halt.

I will get through this. Faith fights even when it looks hopeless. We have hope!

What greater service is there than being part of your tribe, and loving on them when they need it so desperately?

I miss you all, and hate it that there is so little time for Connect.

Hopefully this is just a long bump in the road.

Take care of each other.
Love you big,
Mamacita Jane

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@mamacita

@gingerw, I have had to ask for help. My spouse is in isolation with MRSA here at hospital. My daughtwr is in ICU for the third week.

I have had to change my entire life, my whole routine, to be there for my loved ones. My life in community service has come
to a screeching halt.

I will get through this. Faith fights even when it looks hopeless. We have hope!

What greater service is there than being part of your tribe, and loving on them when they need it so desperately?

I miss you all, and hate it that there is so little time for Connect.

Hopefully this is just a long bump in the road.

Take care of each other.
Love you big,
Mamacita Jane

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@mamacita– my word what a bumpy road it is. I just feel terrible that we can't help. How are you holding up? MRSA? Is this from when he was recently in the hospital?

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@mamacita

@gingerw, I have had to ask for help. My spouse is in isolation with MRSA here at hospital. My daughtwr is in ICU for the third week.

I have had to change my entire life, my whole routine, to be there for my loved ones. My life in community service has come
to a screeching halt.

I will get through this. Faith fights even when it looks hopeless. We have hope!

What greater service is there than being part of your tribe, and loving on them when they need it so desperately?

I miss you all, and hate it that there is so little time for Connect.

Hopefully this is just a long bump in the road.

Take care of each other.
Love you big,
Mamacita Jane

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Gee whiz @mamacita , that’s just too much! Do you have a safe, comfortable place to sleep? How about meals? I know that, right now, your priorities are your husband and daughter, but you must add yourself to the list. We all value you and your input on Connect, but as important as you are to us, you are much more important to your family! Please take care.

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@contentandwell

@imallears That's great that you were able to get the money refunded. I hope everyone realized it was the only thing to do, to cancel. We still do not know what if any we will get back from our travel insurance but as my husband said, our health is more important than a few thousand dollars.
JK

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@contentandwell

Your husband is absolutely right. Just learned that the trip we had planned at the end of April to go up to New Jersey to see my granddaughter in a college play is postponed. She is home here in Fl with her room mate for spring break and learned today that spring break is extended another week. All classes except for studio classes will be held online. All school plays have been cancelled. The airline says we get one free change of schedule so we may fly up for Mothers Day weekend. However, who knows what things will be like by then. A golf classic here was cancelled…something my kids go to every year..and a big deal here in Florida.

Just learned that Broadway is closed down starting tonight and that the governor is banning crowds of more that 500. I opted out of an Irish party at a pub in Disney Springs this weekend called Ragland Road. The huge pub (3 pubs in one building) was built in Ireland and moved here brick by brick. Its such a fun place to be anytime with pipers and step dancers and good food. Apparently they are still having it. This is the first thing I have actually done to change one of my plans. I still go to my gym classes but it is now half the size it was. This is an active senior class so we are in that vulnerable age group. Just trying to live as normally as possible with sensible precautions and not go places I don't need to be.

Need a new book to read and was thinking about heading to the library and then said to myself….ugh…books handled by a ton of other people. So think I will go buy one instead (which I hate to do because you can read for free).

So far, I do not personally know anyone who is sick. My daughter is an ARNP and all her patients in the facilities are sick with something or other or have comprised immune systems. She said the staff is practically following her around and wiping down areas as she makes her visits.

She ordered 2 masks online at a total cost of $25. Incredibly hard to get them as people have hoarded them and prices have surged.

FL Mary

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