Spiraling down but fighting to stay up.

Posted by java_mom @java_mom, Oct 6, 2018

I wanted to introduce myself and talk a bit about how I’ve been feeling lately.
I’ve been dealing with major depression and anxiety disorder. I also suspect there’s PTSD in there as well. About 11 years ago I was hospitalized a few times and had ECT.
Lately things have been absolute sh$t. Sleeping loads, eating less, not wanting to get out of bed or leave the house. I feel a deep and profound sadness. My mom says I have a big load to carry (miscarriage, brain surgery, knee surgery, stalker ex) but I tend to be like ‘oh I’m fine.’ Obviously, I’m not.
Currently I’m on Pristiq, Klonopin and Risperdal (sp.?). I want to feel normal and not like a broken human.
Thank you for letting me share. I’d like to hear your experiences and coping techniques, too.


Liked by sirgalahad, Lyn, aellason

Hi everyone! I first want to say that I think we are all fighters. Depression and anxiety is tricky and mean. I, too feel that I am spiraling down sometimes. I have suffered from Bipolar depression and anxiety for about 19 years, and it seems to be something that any amount of medicine or therapy can help. I take 5 different psychotropic drugs, CBD oil, a B Complex, and Ashwaganda…I wonder every day what might be helping and what might be making me worse. I struggle to bathe every day, and I do things like abuse caffeine and nicotinw. What are some of the things the help others in this thread?


Marisa – I have been where you are several times. Helpful things beyond medication and therapy: #1 is exercise…hard to do when you don't feel like moving but it is the #1 helpful item in my opinion and experience managing depression for 20+ years. You can start slowly, even 5 minutes a day and work your way up. Some studies suggest exercise can be as beneficial, or even more beneficial, than medication. See a doctor first if you have not exercised in a while. A personal trainer can be helpful too. Good luck and keep the faith.


I know very much how you feel! I have been agoraphobic for some time from tapering a benzodiazepine. And in bed. I decided to start an antidepressant today which I believe will help me. It’s so hard when you’re down to think better things are ahead but I hope for all of us that struggle from anxiety and depression for whatever reason they are. If I cannot seem to do one day at a time (even that’s too much sometimes) I try one hour at a time. I’ve lost a ton of weight too and struggling to find pleasure but as my screen name expresses I have hope somewhere inside me. :).


I'm just starting a new health regimen that is working wonders so far and I'm sharing it with you.

The impetus for doing it is my doctor put a scare in me a few weeks ago that my blood test showed pre-diabetes. That scared me into action and my plan is working wonders, having struggled with depress., anxiety, overweight and insomnia, waking early.

This is what I now do – Every day, or at least 5 – 7 days a week, rain or shine, hot or cold, (I dress appropriately for the weather) I wake up and I walk, starting from my home to the nearby park with a paved walking path, beautiful natural surroundings, the sound of the creek, the smell of the fresh air, and I walk the path to the end and back home, hills and all, so that a third of my walk is along the sidewalk to the park, about a third is in the park, and a third back home, for a total walk of just over an hour a day.

I expect as I get into better shape, that time will decrease, but my walking goal is an hour a day. Well! Starting from day one, walking to/from/in the park reduces my anxiety, boosts my mood, helps me to get to bed earlier, and I'm losing weight, going from my present 230 to my goal weight of 180, giving myself a healthy, safe 6 months to reach 180, a done deal, I've made up my mind and know that to be my ideal weight. And, I betcha when I go back to my doctor, he's going to say i no longer have pre-diabetes!

The other thing I'm doing is, as a former sugar addict, like many people, I've cut out all processed foods and refined carbs like cookies and cakes, and replaced them with 3 reasonable meals a day, a daily salad, and, in-between meals, I only eat fresh fruits and vegs., as many as I want. An "apple a day!" (And my digestive health is improving, too!) The weight is coming off, I feel better, and if I could bottle what walking for an hour does, I would give it to all of you and see your moods lift and excess pounds peel off and walking soaks up anxiety like a sponge!

Please, if you are able, lace up the walking shoes and step outside, everybody!

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I just can’t get up to make a cup of coffee let alone get up and walk. Shouldn’t say can’t but I feel paralyzed with even the thought of getting up and doing much at all due to high anxiety and depression.
My 47 yr old daughter passed from ovarian cancer 2 years ago followed by a string of other very negative incidents that have me in the pits.
This is not the active, happy, motivated me I want back.
Is Omega brite same as Fish oil?
Thanks much,


@rascal1 Omega Bright is fish oil. Things have been rough for you. Try to focus on you and taking care of you. Not easy when you are down. Try to at least drink some water as dehydration can make things worse. Sorry to lecture but keeping hydrated is a start. Start slowly. You can do this. People here do care.

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