Recognizing my own bias or prejudice .....

Posted by ellerbracke @ellerbracke, Aug 31, 2019

I know I am very guilty of classifying people in general, and regarding weight in particular. Living in the bible/heart attack/ diabetes belt, it simply blows my mind how many obese people I see every single day when out and about. Granted, fewer of those at Dillard’s than Walmart. Still, in addition to being concerned, I am also judging those people. I know I should not, but how in the world can someone get that fat? It would take years of dedicated overeating to reach that. No, I really don’t think that all of them have a medical issue, seeing what’s in their grocery carts. Someone help me get a less judgmental attitude when I’ve been semi-denying myself all those chips and cookies and fries for decades?? I live and eat well, but treats should be treats, not daily food.

@ellerbracke
My swimming was 40 years ago.
I’d sink straight to the bottom if I jumped in a pool now. My shoulder surgeries finished my swimming.
Jake

REPLY

Ok, @jakedduck1, don't think that I'll allow you to blame any weight gain on the Canadian chocolate I recommended. After all, you did eat it!

REPLY

@hopeful33250
Oh well, it was worth a shot. Would you believe I only ate it so I could prove you right?
Jake

REPLY
@jakedduck1

@ellerbracke
My swimming was 40 years ago.
I’d sink straight to the bottom if I jumped in a pool now. My shoulder surgeries finished my swimming.
Jake

Jump to this post

@jakedduck1 What about just walking in a pool? You can do leg raises and so forth.

REPLY
@jakedduck1

@hopeful33250
Oh well, it was worth a shot. Would you believe I only ate it so I could prove you right?
Jake

Jump to this post

Yep, I believe it @jakedduck1

Liked by lioness, Leonard

REPLY
@gingerw

@hopeful33250 That is an uplifting note. I recall as a child that my dad waged a battle with weight, as he had a job that didn't have a lot of exercise, but had a big appetite, and little down time to do activities. My mother shamed him into Metracal shakes, raw eggs washed down with coffee for breakfast, etc. He was a tall man and his family were all tall with "heavy bones", where my mother and her side were fairly petite. I have a picture where I look exactly like my dad's sister, who was not a small lady. My sisters, on the other hand, all took after my mother's side. But I have not spent a lot of time on body image. Rather, I know for myself that I eat as healthy as possible, exercise as I can, and am who I am – strong, considerate, respectful, compassionate.

@ellerbracke The lure of salt and fat that is irresistible to so many, is a contributing factor. Mass media fosters gluttony, as do fast food outlets, printed advertisements. Add to that the very real emotional satisfaction that some people get from eating, even if it is wrong, and it can be a recipe for more weight than healthy. We never know what someone is going through. By looking at someone, you do not know their health, or emotional struggles, nor their socio-economic struggles. Lower income earners may choose to go for less expensive but also less healthy food choices, just to fill their stomachs. For many people, eating is a social thing, whether alone or in a group. Asking for help to be less judgmental, I would refer back to the saying "judge not lest you be judged".
Ginger

Jump to this post

@gingerw Thanks for sharing your family story. Acceptance of who we are is certainly important. I'm glad that you aren't trying to look like your mother and sisters. That would make life very difficult for you.

REPLY
@hopeful33250

@jakedduck1 What about just walking in a pool? You can do leg raises and so forth.

Jump to this post

@hopeful33250
Well I don’t remember asking for your 2 cents, lol here but I suppose I can do that but the swim exercise class is at 8am. I think I’d rather be fat than get to the gym that early.
Jake

REPLY
@jakedduck1

@hopeful33250
Well I don’t remember asking for your 2 cents, lol here but I suppose I can do that but the swim exercise class is at 8am. I think I’d rather be fat than get to the gym that early.
Jake

Jump to this post

@jakedduck1 My swim exercise class is also at 8 a.m. At first, I thought as you do, but then I found myself waking up early so I get into the water. Give it a try! (I'll always add my 2 cents.)

REPLY
@hopeful33250

Just wondering if anyone else has any thoughts about body image and/or eating disorders. Have you known of anyone who has had an eating disorder? As younger women are most affected by the race-to-thinness, what can be done?

Jump to this post

@hopeful33250 I was bulimic when I was in my 20s. I had been heavy and lost a lot of weight but occasionally I couldn’t stop myself and binged on something so I would do what people do when they are bulimic. It was not a daily thing, just maybe weekly or so.

Eating too much is an addiction. When I was 90 pounds heavier I was always telling myself that I would start dieting tomorrow but tomorrow never came. I bought very few clothes and bought nothing expensive because I was going to lose weight! Now when I see young women who are very overweight I want to shake them and tell them how much they are compromising their health.

@ellerbracke Your measurements are great but I could never have achieved them, I’m an “Apple”, thick in the middle and always have been even when I was a size 5 in my 20s.

My loss of weight after my TKR and now has nothing to do with appetite, I’m as hungry as ever!

@gingerw Ginger, you are very compassionate and understanding… and right. Eating too much is, as I said, an addiction due to various things going on in a person’s life. Plus, I AM ALWAYS HUNGRY. I have learned control most of the time though, but put a big, yummy piece of cake in front of me and I will probably eat the whole thing, as I did at my son’s rehearsal dinner and wedding (but I still lost weight!). I do better having none, I can’t just have a small piece.

@jakedduck1 I am quite impressed by your swimming. I thought my daughter was good. She was at our place on a lake in Maine for an extended amount of time a few years ago and swam about two miles every morning before breakfast. Now she swims at her Health club quite a few times a week. I think she was born swimming. When I was pregnant with her there was so much activity they did an ultrasound to see if I was carrying twins – back then ultrasounds were not done routinely. I figure she was just swimming laps in there! 😁
JK

REPLY
@jakedduck1

@hopeful33250
Well I don’t remember asking for your 2 cents, lol here but I suppose I can do that but the swim exercise class is at 8am. I think I’d rather be fat than get to the gym that early.
Jake

Jump to this post

@jakedduck1 I go (when not recovering from a fracture) to a 9:00 AM class and then I walk/jog for another 30 – 40 minutes. If I don’t make the class I just go to the pool later and do that. Does the pool that you can use have times when you could do it?
JK

REPLY
@contentandwell

@jakedduck1 I go (when not recovering from a fracture) to a 9:00 AM class and then I walk/jog for another 30 – 40 minutes. If I don’t make the class I just go to the pool later and do that. Does the pool that you can use have times when you could do it?
JK

Jump to this post

@contentandwell
If I could get away I might try that. There are benefits to being a care giver.
Jake

REPLY
@hopeful33250

@jakedduck1 My swim exercise class is also at 8 a.m. At first, I thought as you do, but then I found myself waking up early so I get into the water. Give it a try! (I'll always add my 2 cents.)

Jump to this post

@hopeful33250
Well actually I always appreciate your and everyone else’s 2 cents worth. In my 20’s I was at the Y by 5 or 5:15, swimming started at 5:30am but now taking care of my mom being up so often at night I try to sleep in but my mom is hollering fo her breakfast from 5 on. I think that’s way to early considering I don’t eat any breakfast.

REPLY
@jakedduck1

@hopeful33250
Well actually I always appreciate your and everyone else’s 2 cents worth. In my 20’s I was at the Y by 5 or 5:15, swimming started at 5:30am but now taking care of my mom being up so often at night I try to sleep in but my mom is hollering fo her breakfast from 5 on. I think that’s way to early considering I don’t eat any breakfast.

Jump to this post

@jakedduck1 I see that you do have some very extenuating circumstances. Can you get any respite care for your mom so that you can get away a bit more?

REPLY
@jakedduck1

@hopeful33250
Well actually I always appreciate your and everyone else’s 2 cents worth. In my 20’s I was at the Y by 5 or 5:15, swimming started at 5:30am but now taking care of my mom being up so often at night I try to sleep in but my mom is hollering fo her breakfast from 5 on. I think that’s way to early considering I don’t eat any breakfast.

Jump to this post

@jakedduck1 Leonard, for how how long can you leave your mother? It’s a huge commitment to be a caregiver as you are but you do need some time for yourself too. Is having a home care worker in for a couple of hours a day or every other a day a covered service under Medicare?
JK

REPLY

@ellerbracke
Hi,

Oh there are so many judgmental just plain nasty people out there who constantly shame others, especially the overweight. I think judging these people is almost a natural reaction but I can’t tolerate shaming…especially when children do it. I also see too many overweight or obese people daily…too many young ones and too many in the health care industry. I feel sad for them especially the children.

My daughter who is a nurse practitioner and works in the ALFs here treats obese patients daily. She has so many patients with families that bring them in pizzas and junk food and then turn around and ask angrily why their parent is so sick and her lab numbers so bad. 70% of medical problems are food related.

I personally have overweight and obese friends who are just plain lazy and have told me they accept the way they are. They are not inclined to eat healthy and have no interest in nutrition and don’t want to hear about anything relating to good health. It’s frustrating and yes, I do judge them because they are smart people otherwise. I think…then don’t complain to me about any ailments you have or that you may be pre diabetic …you aren’t listening to advice even from your doctors. And the doctors! My friends husband is morbidly obese and she told me he his doctor never told him to lose weight. His doctor should be scaring the crap out of him.Meanwhile she is trying to help him on her own and his doctor just adjustshis insulin intake.

Too many people are unaware of how to choose healthy eating habits…they are living day to day just earning a living and raising families. They don’t read labels or read any literature that is food related because they honestly don’t know what’s available to them. It’s easier to shop for the same unhealthy cheaper foods especially when you encounter fast food eateries everywhere you go even at the supermarket and are bombarded with tv ads for junk. They don’t know that it takes just as much time to cook a healthy meal as it does an unhealthy one.

I blame the FDA and Drug Companies and Tobacco companies with their phony biased research funded by food and drug lobbyists. These people are not out to help you, they are out to make money….period the end. There’s research that says Coke can be beneficial to you and not as bad as it’s made out to be. ……research is funded by the CocoCola Company.

This country is doomed if the obesity rate doesn’t drop and everyone has to fend for themselves. Our children’s lifespans will get shorter. We are the only species that overeats and does not regulate their food intake (us and the poor animals we feed). We’re the most evolved species? We have a friend who reversed her early diagnosed MS because my daughter told her what to eat and gave her a cookbook. She listened big time and is as healthy as she was when younger.

I could go on but will spare you…it makes me so angry when I see and hear what I do. I don’t want to push advice on anyone but I’m only too happy to nudge you along the path.

Regards from FL Mary

REPLY
Please login or register to post a reply.