Does anyone have these problems? How do you handle it?
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Your post mirrors my life! I am concerned about aging and loneliness. And depression and anxiety are on both sides of the family. I’m not sure if depression, which I’ve had since 1992, causes the anxiety but usually when 1 is bad, the other is good. Right now, I am battling chronic worry. Tools learned are not helping right now. I think it’s time for chemical intervention. I will also reread some books I have (David Burns’s book is one). It somehow feels good to know I’m not the only one!……Karen
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You are in good company, @karen00.
Thanks for this good post on worry, @merpreb. I agree especially with the comment about needing to determine worry is destructive. That's essentially what my husband kindly impresses on me when I worry: that it's non-productive and not helpful.
The cognitive behavioral therapy process I learned is essentially what is outlined in the steps here: https://www.mayoclinic.org/tests-procedures/cognitive-behavioral-therapy/about/pac-20384610.
Journaling your repetitive thoughts for a couple of days or a week is pretty instructive, I've found. The patterns tell you a lot. Countering I've done is essentially looking at how realistic or accurate my thoughts are. Often, if quite worried or nervous, I am looking at the worst case, most doomsday scenario exclusively or almost so. Then I need to question the reality or chance the thing I was worrying about might actually happen.
In my scenario where I thought I might be in for a $2000 hardwood floor refinishing job since we had a lot of water in a 12×12-inch puddle that had sat on our bedroom floor for a number of hours from a humidifier gone wrong, I'd ask myself what the percentage chance the floor might be ruined and need a refinishing job would realistically be. 40 percent? I'd then reframe my thoughts and whenever I thought about my floor, I'd remind myself to think about that there is a 60 percent chance our floor will be fine and dry up without ruining the floor.
You are very welcome @lisalucier,
I too worry, and it seems constant. I find my self stuck in the past over divorce and how my depression and anxiety seemed a little easier to deal with in some ways. Now I am feeling a healthy relationship is not possible. Concern over getting older (60) and alone is a worry. But I have to say that depression and anxiety run in my family on both sides, I have the same diagnosis as my dad and sister, bipolar. My depression, worry and anxiety go back as early as 9- 10 years old. I think my depression is what causes the
ruminating and anxiety. I think the irritability is the worst symptom. Sometimes it has been hard for me to tell if it’s the situation that s making me depressed, obsessive and anxious or if it’s my disorder that makes the situations of life more difficult to deal with. Does anyone else deal with these issues?
I appreciate your honest, questioning approach to your worry. Yes, it can be hard to determine where the worry is coming from. It is hard to know if the circumstances in life cause the worry or if the chemical imbalance in the brain (bipolar) is causing the excessive worry. It is probably important to talk with a doctor well-trained in treating bipolar disorders and find a med that will work for this condition.
Then some cognitive behavior therapy (CBT) might also be helpful so that you can learn some new ways of thinking through stressors and developing more realistic approaches to life's problems. David Burns has done a lot of writing on CBT, here are some of his YouTube videos. You might take a look and see if they are helpful,
Good morning @karen00– Worry isn't a chemical imbalance. We all worry to one degree or another but i'm not sure if any chemical would help unless you wanted to be stoned into oblivion and not feel anything. I think that you have a lot of good suggestions on these posts. As hard as it is, I know because I've been there and have felt the way you have. I have called it free floating anxiety and worry. Make yourself sit down and list all of the things that you can think of that you are worrying about. I know that some of it is just a feeling of confusion, but do your best. Then next to the list make notes on the things that you have any control over, and put down what they are. Then re-arrange the list by priorities and do something to solve your worries. If any of the things are beyond your control or help then toss those. They are only hurting you. Action now is what you need, no matter how tough it is!
Patti- Perhaps you need another evaluation by another doctor? What does your PCP say about this? Also are you able to get out and walk or exercise?
No I just stay mostly in the house. But so many people like yourself have told me this. Just walk around a little. Must try
to follow yours and everyone that has advised me being more active. Promise I will try it and post it to let you know
If you "just stay mostly in the house" as you said in your post could I suggest you try some exercise videos that you can find on Youtube? These will provide you with some physical activity that very well might help you feel better.
Here are some suggestions:
Mindful Breathing (made by a doctor at Mayo)
Beginner Tai-Chi (many of us on Connect use this video everyday)
Also, here is one about seated exercises,
Try at least one of them and see how you feel. Will you post again about adding some movement to your life?
Thanks will try that exercise program and see how it works Patti
@brit Thank you Patti for the willingness to try. Keep us informed please.
@brit I agree with the advice to be more active. It helps enormously. I had some problems back about 12 years ago and was not very active at the time. Increasing my activity and getting more exercise really did help. It can be difficult to get started but after you do, you will miss it if you are not active.
There are many ways to get active — health clubs or a Y for exercise, volunteering to help with something, and finding a book club or social circle that is open to new members. When I was inactive one of the first things I did was to do some volunteer work at the local Food Bank. They only wanted me one day a week but I actually looked forward to that day, it gave me a destination and some structure.
If you do follow through with this I would love to know what you decide to get active in, there are so many.
did walk a little this morning. Didn't want to do it but pushed myself. I must say I do feel a little better. Hearing the birds sing, hearing the leaves in the tress's sing. It felt good…..Thank you so much
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