After i learned to work and achieve some goals I was hooked on seeing how far I could go. I also enjoyed helping others learn. I never liked the word “retire” because it seemed like no fun to disassociate from friends and life, which my in-laws did. I vowed to never retire. I soon learned that if I stayed independent, then no one would think they ever had to help with with the work load. So it has been difficult to need to slow down in life with this aging body and get the work done. So I downsized. I studied and learned to take better care of myself, but never learned to like exercise. Strange, isn’t it that I like to work but don’t like to exercise. That is because my work usually produced a product. I can’t actually see the result that exercise provides. I don’t look thinner and I don’t feel better some of the time. Then there is my short term memory which has given me problems since my forties. So I try to write things down, or nothing stays in my brain for long. My friends are so fearful of Alzheimer’s and I am more afraid of being neglected or rejected. So I reach out to available friends for comfort and help them when they need it. I must work hard to not have to say “I don’t know” in response to how to get help.
We are all in this journey together, I discovered, and none of us is without decline at our age. It is sometimes different in each of us. But together we can figure some things out and we can not sit for more than thirty minutes as the doctors recommend. It is our first start. We can eat better, for improved health. I do know that works in our favor. We can love each other, despite our bad days. We can be honest and ask questions. We are a team.
I never was on a team in school. They didn’t want me. Now I am on our team and we are going to win a few. I believe in us. I believe in God.
It is a good life so long as I remember to get our of the chair after thirty minutes. I wish I could get out of a car like Jackie Kennedy did for the photographers, and walk gracefully. It is never going to happen for me again. That’s o.k. I’ll think of something else. If I can remember. Dorisena