Jumbled feelings

Posted by Merry, Volunteer Mentor @merpreb, Fri, Feb 1 10:48am

There are times when I seem to be feeling so many things at once. They all seem to meld into a big fat pain in the butt, an uncomfortable jumbled feeling. When I feeling depressed and angry, my PTSD raises its ugly head. And I feel as if things are piling up on me. I feel overwhelmed, wondering if I'll ever feel in control of my feelings and reactions again.
There are both primary and secondary emotions and they piggyback on each other-even tertiary feelings add to this, looking like a frog free-for-all. For example- If you are afraid that an ex will show up you might feel fearful and then become angry and this can feed another feeling like fight or flight reactions. Or you are told that you have cancer. You first feel shocked and frightened, then angry and resentful. Why me? I’m afraid that I’ll die.

One late afternoon I got angry at my husband for calling for me from another room to go see him. {{{MERRY}}}… I became angry and fearful and resentful. I reacted with feeling very anxious because it reminded me of how my mother would call for me so she could blame me for something that my twin did, or for something that I didn’t do well enough. It made me feel as if everything I did was wrong. It made me feel like a failure and I hated her for it.
Anger seems to be the beginning of a lot of these piggyback emotions. They are like jigsaw puzzles, all fitting into each other to make one big picture. I know that I’m most vulnerable when things aren’t going my way, or the way I think that they should be.

Feelings perplex and confuse and stump us- and many times we don’t stop and think why we react and feel the way we do, we just want to hide. And there are many more feelings than anger and fear that are negative that can hurt us and can make us feel horrible.
Here are some: Apathetic, bad, frustrated, guilty, depressed, gloomy, irritated, restless and sad. And there are more. What feelings piggyback on you? Have you felt other emotions that I didn’t list.

Hi, @merpreb – thanks for starting this discussion about having jumbled feelings. I think many people can relate to this situation.

I'd also like to bring into this discussion @amberpep @pjss48 @mmussak @thankful @harleneq @terri672 @annfsd @sandytoes14 @pankaj and @elwooodsdad for their thoughts on experiencing and processing multiple emotions at once.

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Hi Lisa- I'd also like to bring @ parus and @lioness and @gingerw into this discussion.

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No matter when those ugly feelings rear there ugly faces first thing I do is just quit what I'm doing ,sit down and write my feelings out telling IT to go jump in the lake ,holler at it breath deeply ,if your religious give it up to God then I do Tapping which is one of my tools A good explanation of this is On Tapping .com also You tube ,,I take a hot shower let the water wash the feelings away Call a friend who understands. I've known people that use a punching bag each time talking ,in your mind ,to get out of here tell yourself quit messing with me Im better then you .Then after you feel better continue your life.I don't know if some of this will help but hope so.I feel better just writing this.Thank you Merpreb

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@lioness– thank you. I know that you work hard to keep these beasties at bay. What are the feelings that comprise them? I want to break them down into different, separate feelings so they aren't clumped together under the name, depression.

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@merpreb

@lioness– thank you. I know that you work hard to keep these beasties at bay. What are the feelings that comprise them? I want to break them down into different, separate feelings so they aren't clumped together under the name, depression.

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You are making a good point, @merpreb. These feelings are usually comprised of memories of the past (with some trigger in the present as you mentioned when your husband calls your name), or a specific holiday, or a certain piece of music that might trigger an uncomfortable feeling.

It does take time to "sort out the jumble" of feelings. I like what @lioness said about sitting down and writing how she is feeling at the time. Writing is a great tool to sort out confusing and uncomfortable feelings. I've used it a lot myself.

Any other thoughts?

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@merpreb

@lioness– thank you. I know that you work hard to keep these beasties at bay. What are the feelings that comprise them? I want to break them down into different, separate feelings so they aren't clumped together under the name, depression.

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My anxiety problems stem from family issues ,did I do the right thing it hunts me at times and Brings on my anxiety when this occurs I talk to myself to calm myself and do Tapping which helps me a lot ,even confronting the family member about this still doesn't help so it's something I have to control and Tapping does this for me.

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@lioness

My anxiety problems stem from family issues ,did I do the right thing it hunts me at times and Brings on my anxiety when this occurs I talk to myself to calm myself and do Tapping which helps me a lot ,even confronting the family member about this still doesn't help so it's something I have to control and Tapping does this for me.

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It sounds like you have developed several things for your "tool-bag" that help you handle worrisome thoughts. I appreciate your sharing those, @lioness.

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@hopeful33250

It sounds like you have developed several things for your "tool-bag" that help you handle worrisome thoughts. I appreciate your sharing those, @lioness.

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@hopeful33250 It took awhile for me to find them but God has been my strength and I give Him all the glory

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@hopeful33250 @merpreb It seems to me that feelings can be called by one name at times, but fit another category at the next time. A combination of two or more morph into something completely new. Dissecting them out like @lioness said, "takes the wind out of its sails", so you can examine the triggers. Anger, sadness, feeling less than someone else, fearfulness, tired, a remembrance of a trying time, even positive feelings, all can be triggers.
Ginger

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@gingerw I like your analogy of "taking the wind out of its sails." Overwhelming feelings can be made less powerful as we dissect them and understand their origins. Point well taken! Thanks for that astute observation👌

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@gingerw– I totally agree with you and your analogy is perfect because that's exactly what happens. My goal in starting this discussion, as @hopeful33250 so eloquently stated we want to help make them less powerful so we don't get ill from them. Taking power back into our lives is the most important process to feeling well. Anger is always anger, but can be triggered by different things and eventually become less important in the journey. I think that situations change the importance of each feeling but doesn't change the actual feeling. what do you think?

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@merpreb

@gingerw– I totally agree with you and your analogy is perfect because that's exactly what happens. My goal in starting this discussion, as @hopeful33250 so eloquently stated we want to help make them less powerful so we don't get ill from them. Taking power back into our lives is the most important process to feeling well. Anger is always anger, but can be triggered by different things and eventually become less important in the journey. I think that situations change the importance of each feeling but doesn't change the actual feeling. what do you think?

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@merpreb Absolutely! There are many levels of intensity for any feeling. The goal is to minimize the negative ones, build up the positive ones. I really agree that breaking them down to basic components helps. Like @lioness, writing helps me, to see it in writing. I do my journaling in longhand, not on a computer. I have kept those books, and go through them once in a great while. Having taken graphology classes, it is interesting to see what the words say, and what the emotions under the surface say.
Ginger

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@gingerw That is so true I just was so overwhelmed lately that's exactly what happened it took the wind out of my sail I,ve never experienced it so strongly but after talking it out ,it was like the blue water cleanser me and I was calm again Very good analogy

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@lioness

@gingerw That is so true I just was so overwhelmed lately that's exactly what happened it took the wind out of my sail I,ve never experienced it so strongly but after talking it out ,it was like the blue water cleanser me and I was calm again Very good analogy

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@lioness– Was there something unusual going on that you felt overwhelmed that you would like to share?

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@gingerw

@merpreb Absolutely! There are many levels of intensity for any feeling. The goal is to minimize the negative ones, build up the positive ones. I really agree that breaking them down to basic components helps. Like @lioness, writing helps me, to see it in writing. I do my journaling in longhand, not on a computer. I have kept those books, and go through them once in a great while. Having taken graphology classes, it is interesting to see what the words say, and what the emotions under the surface say.
Ginger

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@gingerw– Oh that must have been an interesting course! Is graphology about handwriting and what it expresses?

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