Jumbled feelings

Posted by Merry, Volunteer Mentor @merpreb, Feb 1, 2019

There are times when I seem to be feeling so many things at once. They all seem to meld into a big fat pain in the butt, an uncomfortable jumbled feeling. When I feeling depressed and angry, my PTSD raises its ugly head. And I feel as if things are piling up on me. I feel overwhelmed, wondering if I'll ever feel in control of my feelings and reactions again.
There are both primary and secondary emotions and they piggyback on each other-even tertiary feelings add to this, looking like a frog free-for-all. For example- If you are afraid that an ex will show up you might feel fearful and then become angry and this can feed another feeling like fight or flight reactions. Or you are told that you have cancer. You first feel shocked and frightened, then angry and resentful. Why me? I’m afraid that I’ll die.

One late afternoon I got angry at my husband for calling for me from another room to go see him. {{{MERRY}}}… I became angry and fearful and resentful. I reacted with feeling very anxious because it reminded me of how my mother would call for me so she could blame me for something that my twin did, or for something that I didn’t do well enough. It made me feel as if everything I did was wrong. It made me feel like a failure and I hated her for it.
Anger seems to be the beginning of a lot of these piggyback emotions. They are like jigsaw puzzles, all fitting into each other to make one big picture. I know that I’m most vulnerable when things aren’t going my way, or the way I think that they should be.

Feelings perplex and confuse and stump us- and many times we don’t stop and think why we react and feel the way we do, we just want to hide. And there are many more feelings than anger and fear that are negative that can hurt us and can make us feel horrible.
Here are some: Apathetic, bad, frustrated, guilty, depressed, gloomy, irritated, restless and sad. And there are more. What feelings piggyback on you? Have you felt other emotions that I didn’t list.

@gingerw That is so true I just was so overwhelmed lately that's exactly what happened it took the wind out of my sail I,ve never experienced it so strongly but after talking it out ,it was like the blue water cleanser me and I was calm again Very good analogy

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@lioness

@gingerw That is so true I just was so overwhelmed lately that's exactly what happened it took the wind out of my sail I,ve never experienced it so strongly but after talking it out ,it was like the blue water cleanser me and I was calm again Very good analogy

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@lioness– Was there something unusual going on that you felt overwhelmed that you would like to share?

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@gingerw

@merpreb Absolutely! There are many levels of intensity for any feeling. The goal is to minimize the negative ones, build up the positive ones. I really agree that breaking them down to basic components helps. Like @lioness, writing helps me, to see it in writing. I do my journaling in longhand, not on a computer. I have kept those books, and go through them once in a great while. Having taken graphology classes, it is interesting to see what the words say, and what the emotions under the surface say.
Ginger

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@gingerw– Oh that must have been an interesting course! Is graphology about handwriting and what it expresses?

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@merpreb

@lioness– Was there something unusual going on that you felt overwhelmed that you would like to share?

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@merpreb Maybe this would help all us older peop!e who lived in a simpler time. I lost my phone in a service car that brought me home .I and my medical transportation made a claim out to Lyft,also I called Sprint and had phone deactivated all week this went on when the phone company should have told me first time I called I had insurance on phone so could get a replacement no took 5 days to find this out I was so overwhelmed by going through all of this , In earlier days 70,s 80,s this would not have been the case At 3a.m. Was so strongly overwhelmed I emailed to talk helped ,had a cup of Chamomile tea ,deep breathing ,essential oil mist finally felt calmer and went to lala land.Thanks merpreb

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Jumbled sums it up. Angry with the physical pain as cannot get it under control. Hurts no matter what. Emotions all over the place. The anger does not help the pain in the least. Anger may be why pain is more intense. Please no one placate me with platitudes for now or suggest I take deep breathes.
Needed to touch base is all. I know there are some who will understand.
Thanks. Have things to deal with

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@Paris In so sorry hang in there

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@parus

Jumbled sums it up. Angry with the physical pain as cannot get it under control. Hurts no matter what. Emotions all over the place. The anger does not help the pain in the least. Anger may be why pain is more intense. Please no one placate me with platitudes for now or suggest I take deep breathes.
Needed to touch base is all. I know there are some who will understand.
Thanks. Have things to deal with

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Wishing you better days ahead, @parus. If you need to say more, I'm all ears.

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@merpreb

@gingerw– Oh that must have been an interesting course! Is graphology about handwriting and what it expresses?

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@merpreb Graphology is handwriting analysis, and understanding personalities that the writing reveals. I was told I have a gift for it, and have proved some unusual insights when tested. Forensic graphology, as used in investigative work, is particularly interesting to me.
Ginger

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@parus

Jumbled sums it up. Angry with the physical pain as cannot get it under control. Hurts no matter what. Emotions all over the place. The anger does not help the pain in the least. Anger may be why pain is more intense. Please no one placate me with platitudes for now or suggest I take deep breathes.
Needed to touch base is all. I know there are some who will understand.
Thanks. Have things to deal with

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@parus– I'm here always

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