Is your spouse sleeping too much?

Well, Tom is still not sleeping regularly. At his last dr appt his neurologist switched his donepezil from bedtime to morning because she said it could act as a stimulator, but i don't see much of a difference. But there have been some behavior differences and i think he may be starting to develop or developed delirium. I'm looking back on dr. notes about this AND some internet research and he showing signs. So Ive got an email into her to get her take on it and set up another appointment. Maybe we need to switch meds again or add to some or delete some? I don't know, but i don't like this part cuz it's kinda scary.. scarier than the diagnosis, if you can believe that. And i'm still not sleeping,,,,uggghh 🙁
Hugs and prayers to all!

Hi bayviewgirl,
I am sorry to hear your Tom is having problems with his meds. I was also afraid to have Will stop taking one of his two anxiety pills because of what it might do to him, but he was miserable and depressed and so was I. After going to 3 of his doctors and getting no answer, I asked the cardiologist if the sleepiness could be caused by one of the meds, and he agreed, but again no answer. I found Will was taking 2 anxiety pills, so I asked Will if he would start taking one pill every other day, and then stop. He began to feel like himself again and it is now going on 3 weeks and he is doing very well. I notified his doctors that Will stopped taking the anxiety med and that he was feeling much better. If this med had not helped, I would have asked the doctors again to help find the meds causing the sleepiness because it really was so painful for me see him so unhappy and giving up his quality of life. It is scary to change meds, and maybe the dosage could be changed. I would encourage you to keep asking Tom’s doctors to find an answer because I do believe it is in the meds.
Please let me know what you find out.
God’s blessings to both of you.

8 years? You are a saint. No guilt for you! Only kudis! You need her naps to give you the strength to carry on. Do you have any help?

I used to have a family member take her to lunch and shopping once a month so I could attend a caregiver support meeting at the senior center. Unfortunately, that is no longer possible. She can't tolerate being away from me for more than a couple hours so having someone come in to our home really isn't an option.

Oh I am sorry, that is so much pressure on you. What if you ease someone in? Start with an hour while you are there…etc.? I’m sure you tried many things. Don’t feel guilty about a thing! Hey does the caregiver support group have the ability to use a laptop and include you via zoom? During a nap
Maybe you could attend remotely?🤷‍♀️

Thank you so much for these ideas, my own creativity seems stifled lately and too many things have no apparent solutions. In fact, I do have a couple of other musicians coming to our house tomorrow for some jamming, and this will become more frequent, hopefully, and possibly lead to my wife becoming more comfortable with the idea of making a friend or two. She isn't a musician, but loves listening.
The caregiver group hasn't done anything remote, but that's an excellent idea, I know the group leader fairly well as she sings with me sometimes at nursing home events, so I will talk to her.

For me, 12 yrs ago, I had an accident and moved from normal to TBI, instead. From my anti-seizure meds makes me tired & sleeping more than “normal”. And nothing to do makes me tired

Now, 12 years ago, I moved to do things like cutting our grass, cutting bushes, put lights inside our garage, and more. Ok, I fell down, 2 yers ago, hit my back-ends - not my head - then moved my body with my legs, read-ends, falling down with a bad balance from my right leg.

I still take my anti-seizure, 3-times a da, I’m back and 8, maybe 9, hour a day of waking up and doing better stuff by exercising my body from my back-ends to the bottom of my feet, reading (is a problems on my TBI & takes me longer & understanding) on line stuff - news, priced new/used music stuff, & FB - .

Oppps - I had a suurgey (sp?) 3+ weeks ago. Thankfully, my Doctor A - can’t remember the whole names of people from my TBI - got rid of or changed my nerve of what I needed. The pain, thankfully, is gone. That means to exercise my body to get back of a sorta “normal” walking, working, taking care at our hose, and on… No pain! Thank Christ that I’ve been there, but I’m still here ❤️

As the dementia moves further along they sleep more & more this is very common. Their brain is broken, the signals have become disrupted,

My step-mother just passed from FTD, the closer she got to death the more she slept. She had FTD for 10+ years, spending the last 6 in AL & then MC.

Too many times caregivers try to compare their routines with those who have dementia, doesn't work that way they cannot be molded into a caregivers way of thinking life should be...with dementia....all bets are off, whole new set of guidelines apply.

@dollyme I wish Tom wouldn't sleep so much but this isn't about me and I think i understand why he does...as long as he sleeps he doesn't have to use his brain ....when his brain doesn't want to cooperate with him. And his Dr is okay with this for now since no new problems have arisen.
As for routines, I'm on his routine schedule. I try to get him to participate with what I need to tend to outside the home and if he doesn't want to go, I either put it off til later or get someone to sit with him if I can get it done in a short amount of time