I have had depression most my life. I have took medication for it but I do not stay on it long because of being scared of the side effects or the withdraws from coming off of it. I do not want to become addicted to medication. I have never been addicted to anything so not sure why I feel that way. I have my ups and downs like most people do with mental health I guess. Its hard to talk about it to doctors because I do not trust them either. So how do I get help for myself. I always feel alone even though I am not. I was blessed raising my granddaughter 3 years ago which has helped me stay focused off of me and on her but I constantly feel alone. I live with my ex husband because he helps me with my granddaughter both raising and supporting her. I never want to go anywhere. I have no friends. I have siblings but they have their own life. I do go out once in a great while just to get out and I do enjoy it when I am out but then I come home and right back not wanting to go anywhere. I feel guilty all the time about my life for one reason or another. I have panic attacks, anxiety, along with the depression. I have tried talking to doctors that just want to talk it out but I don’t stay long with that because I feel guilty talking about me and my problems and my past. So can someone tell me what they do for this that works if anything? Thanks for letting me vent this.