Dealing with a Spouse with a “Mild Cognitive Impairment”

@rubyslippers, et al: whew, it is a relief to read your post about how difficult conversation is getting. The 50 questions seem necessary to understand what subject he is discussing and Who!
As the day runs down it is difficult to engage in ANY verbal communication successfully!
I bet you wish you could click those ruby slippers together and appear somewhere calm, comforting and quiet somedays.

However, this is our lot sister- we need to dig deep, stay as positive as humanly possible and “accept this is our reality”!
Each day I emphasize to myself that today I can see the best in actions, appreciate every kind word, manage to keep my mouth shut when frustrated and make today the best day this week! I’m not saying I am successful, but by making this my goal I find I can learn to keep my mouth shut and maybe never understand the story he just told me. I don’t have any solutions to our new roles, I’m just as confused as we can get. We do have eachother to vent to when necessary and share a situation that may help each other. Thanks for being there!

dbamos1945
My wife suffered a brain bleed one year ago. I have not left her side since.
I am wearing down and in isolation.

@ktl Please, find someone to help you so you can preserve your own health. Is your wife at home or in a care facility? Do you have friends or family who can give you a break occasionally?

@sueinmn
So far all care is in our home. I don't even know what kind of care to seek.

@sueinmn
So far all care is in our home. I don't even know what kind of care to seek.

One of the books I ordered is "Creating Moments of Joy". I found the ideas helpful. Since reading through it we have done our normal " picnic lunch" at our local park and I have tried to look for good times and happy moments together. I started playing his CDs of favorite music and we even danced together in our living room. Sadly, MCI may or may not progress. Enjoy what's still reachable.

@kmliste It is exhausting all of the time, and so very lonely. I don't think I can ever learn to smile and walk away. H is pretty stable, too. People outside of our family that know his diagnosis (whatever that is) say he doesn't seem like he's any different, boy do I wish that were true. He can be mean, he thinks he's always right and will look up things as soon as I say them to see if I'm right and delights if he has the slightest differentiation. When he gets confused in a conversation we're having or we're talking in circles (again), well you said, well you said, well I thought, blah blah blah, he will take a high and mighty stance and will say something like "ok, let's go back and go over this again!" and proceeds to explain what I said or did wrong and his version of how it played out, which is a confabulation. sometimes even telling me that I "need to learn". So very out of character for the man I married that was so understanding, kind, sweet, etc., etc.
Since he is still super independent, I find my self avoiding him and keeping very busy all day in every room except the one he's in, glued to the tv and his phone. I cry a lot because I hate this life and facing the future.
I'm sorry, I just realized I totally vented on you. I really wasn't replying to you to be all about me, but I'm leaving it so you know there are others grappling and so anyone else coming by will know they are not alone.
Bless you and keep on keeping on.

@lkbous I am totally the same. We went to the doctors today, shopping etc and then had lunch at home. After lunch he asked if we were going out today. I’m so exhausted and like you wonder what the future holds. I have had three bad days and it hard watching everything you say so as not to upset him. I am mentally drained and so tired. We will no doubt get through this it’s just going to be one day at a time and more tears no doubt knowing I am losing the love of my life who tells me at least 10 times a day how much he loves me. More tears now.