And the Academy Award goes to... Pretender

Posted by judimahoney @judimahoney, 2 days ago

I am now an accomplished actress, putting on the best show everyday. Pretending that I am fine with choices my husband makes when we watch T.V., acting like I am happy and smiling at my husband when he makes certain comments. Like that line from the song, Smile though your heart is breaking.
In order to keep my husband in a happy, relaxed mood I have to act like everything is okay. You've heard of, Fake it till you make it. Guess I'm hoping if I smile the warm feelings will follow.
I've lost myself; who am I now and gee, it was such a fast journey to get to this place where I'm a new person I hardly recognize sometimes.
Can I just say I miss Me, I miss Us.

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Caregivers: Dementia Support Group.

bclane | @bclane | 9 hours ago

Your assessment of your brother sounds spot on. Even if you had been passed out drunk and ESPECIALLY if you had been passed out drunk, he should have stepped in and helped his father with his mother. And you say he's a physician? I guess he's one of those who spend 15 minutes or less with patients and leaves everything else to the nurses.

If your parents financial situation is such that they could afford assisted living, that would be the ideal choice based on what you've said. Whatever happens, though, suicide is not the answer for you. Move out with no guilt before you do something so final.