How about a laugh, (hopefully)

One dark night in Dublin a fire started inside the local chemical plant.
In a blink of an eye it exploded into massive flames. The alarm went out to all the fire departments for miles around.

When the fire fighters appeared on the scene, the chemical company president rushed to the fireman in charge and said, “All our secret formulas are in the vault in the centre of the plant. They must be saved. I will give 50,000 euro to the fire department that brings them out intact.”

But the roaring flames held the fire-fighters off.

Soon more fire departments had to be called in as the situation became desperate. As the firemen arrived, the president shouted out that the offer was now 100,000 euro to the fire station who could bring out the company’s secret files.

But still the fire fighters could not get through.

From the distance, a lone siren was heard as another fire truck came into sight. It was the nearby rural township volunteer fire brigade, composed mainly of old men over 65. To everyone’s amazement, that little run-down fire engine roared right past all the newer sleek engines that were parked outside the plant. Without even slowing down it drove straight into the middle of the inferno.

Outside, the other firemen watched as the old timers jumped off right in the middle of the fire and fought it back on all sides.

It was a performance and effort never seen before.

Within a short time, the old timers had extinguished the fire and had saved the secret formulas.

The grateful chemical company president announced that for such a superhuman feat he was upping the reward to 200,000 euro and walked over to personally thank each of the brave fire fighters.

The local TV station caught the thank you on film and asked the chief, “What are you going to do with all that money?”

“Well,” said Paddy, the 70-year-old fire chief, “the first thing we’re gonna do is fix the brakes on that bloody fire truck.”
Jake

3 days since the last funny post! You slackers!
Where is everybody?
I guess I'll have to go to "You Twit Face" for some companionship and relief from my medicare selection exertions...
No, I'll be insufferable and share a story about my child!

Way back when, I was teaching my daughter to say the "Hail Mary," a Roman Catholic prayer that includes the line, "Blessed art thou among women."
My daughter said, "Blessed are towels among women..." Made sense to me.

Here's another one:
My brother and his family hosted a Japanese exchange student by the name of Koh'-sue-way. My daughter called her "Clothes away." Made sense to me.

You guys better get on the job and post something that is actually funny, or I'll tell more anecdotes like those above...

Seriously, though, I hope that everyone is safe and sound and is feeling as well as possible. : )

A sweet grandmother telephoned St. Joseph's Hospital. She timidly asked, "Is it possible to speak to someone who can tell me how a patient is doing?"

The operator said, "I'll be glad to help, dear. What's the name and room number of the patient?"

The grandmother in her weak, tremulous voice said, Norma Findlay, Room 302."

The operator replied, "Let me put you on hold while I check with the nurse's station for that room."

After a few minutes, the operator returned to the phone and said,

"I have good news. Her nurse just told me that Norma is doing well. Her

blood pressure is fine; her blood work just came back normal and her

Physician, Dr. Cohen, has scheduled her to be discharged tomorrow."

The grandmother said, "Thank you. That's wonderful. I was so worried. God bless you for the good News."

The operator replied, "You're more than welcome. Is Norma your daughter?"

The grandmother said, "No, I'm Norma Findlay in Room 302. No one tells me anything."

If a Lama with one L is a holy man in Tibet, and Llama with two Ls is a beast of burden, what is a three L Lama?
A big fire in Boston.

Don't shoot the messenger!
Ginger

Giggle!