Adults On The Autism Spectrum

Posted by Mamacita, Alumna Mentor @mamacita, Apr 29, 2018

Maybe you were really shy as a child. Perhaps you took home a huge stack of books from the school library, read them, and returned them the next day. Or did your best friend find you crying in your closet, unable to answer the question "Why?" At any rate, your life could be traced to the Self-Help section of the local bookstore. Unfortunately, most of the books were not much help. ADHD seemed to fit, at times. Your shrink said you might be Bi-Polar, although she wasn't really certain. All you knew was that you rarely fit in, anywhere. One day at work, it hit you square in the face: I don't speak these people's language! Really, it was like you were all playing this game, and everyone knew the rules but you. You couldn't tell a joke, and you never "got" any joke your co-worker tried to tell you. People started getting annoyed with you, because you had a memory like a steel trap. They didn't appreciate it when you called them on the carpet. Who knew? This was my life, and worse. I finally aced several tests that pointed me to the answer to my questions. The Autism Spectrum. Guess what? Little kids with Autism grow up to be Adults with Autism. Diagnosed late in life? This is the place for you!

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Autism (ASD) Support Group.

@mamasitalucita

To be content with your own company and to also be free to enjoy the company of others is a wonderful way to live. I feel badly for people who have difficulty with either state of being. Thanks for that great reminder.

I hope that others on the Spectrum might add to these thoughts.

Teresa

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I definitely paid attention to my body , I love it when I feel like doing things in or outside of my house but if I’m having a more painful day I don’t try to push myself but the thing I’ve noticed is that it’s hard for me to make a definite commitment to a friend like going to do something it just makes me to not make any plans , and that makes me sad. Do any of you have that problem ?

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@mamacita

Do you know anyone who isolates, and would rather stay home than go out? Even to the mailbox? I am sure we all have that friend or family member who is quite content to do just that. For myself, I can be perfectly happy just puttering around in my house, cleaning, cooking, and talking with family. Looking back several years ago, I was facing multiple back surgeries, and movement of any kind was miserable. What I would have given to flee the house at that time! It is good to have the choice. I think we need a good mixture of both in our lives, so that we can appreciate what we have. Some days are so good I even forget I am on the Spectrum. I have a choice, every day. I can push through, and past my comfort zones. I can do what my family believes is impossible for me. Or I can listen to what my body is telling me, and just take some time. Hold the space. Rest. Just be. The choice is yours. And it is perfectly okay, whichever one you choose, because it is your choice. Your life. You are loved. You are accepted. Until next time, Mamacitalucita

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You inspire me. I love reading your posts. I’m so glad I found this blog. Thank you mama!

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@mamacita

Do you know anyone who isolates, and would rather stay home than go out? Even to the mailbox? I am sure we all have that friend or family member who is quite content to do just that. For myself, I can be perfectly happy just puttering around in my house, cleaning, cooking, and talking with family. Looking back several years ago, I was facing multiple back surgeries, and movement of any kind was miserable. What I would have given to flee the house at that time! It is good to have the choice. I think we need a good mixture of both in our lives, so that we can appreciate what we have. Some days are so good I even forget I am on the Spectrum. I have a choice, every day. I can push through, and past my comfort zones. I can do what my family believes is impossible for me. Or I can listen to what my body is telling me, and just take some time. Hold the space. Rest. Just be. The choice is yours. And it is perfectly okay, whichever one you choose, because it is your choice. Your life. You are loved. You are accepted. Until next time, Mamacitalucita

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God, Jehovah, Jesus, the Great Spirit, or however your spiritual inclinations lie, loves you so much.  He has your picture on His refrigerator.  And that's a fact, Jack!  Trust me.  I will never beat you over the head with any definitive religious beliefs.  But all of us are spiritual beings, I think. We feel better when we feel like someone else is looking out for us. You know the neat thing?  Makes me want to kind of look out for others, too.  We are better together.  Until next time, Mama

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@jfsherley

Hello, I appreciate your honesty in your post. I believe that what you are saying is that you do not like to pre-plan activities because you are sure that you will feel like keeping the commitment when the time comes. Is that correct?

Teresa

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@hopeful33250

@jfsherley

Hello, I appreciate your honesty in your post. I believe that what you are saying is that you do not like to pre-plan activities because you are sure that you will feel like keeping the commitment when the time comes. Is that correct?

Teresa

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Yes that’s right

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I tried to comment earlier while I was on my way home from my cousin's funeral. Apparently it didn't work, for some reason. In my world, plans are made to be interrupted! Take this weekend, for example. We have this big church gathering in another city two hours from here maybe twice a year. It is planned for, anticipated, hotel rooms are rented, new dresses bought, hats to match the dresses, activities lined up after church is over, where we go eat....the list goes on. Then we find out earlier in the week my first cousin won't likely make it through the night. Great lady. Her suffering is over. As much as we want to go be with our church family and celebrate, we must change our plans and prepare for a funeral. Well, guess what? It was a lovely gathering. I even got to speak a little bit. And I am so glad we changed our plans. My health issues require me to say no many, many times. I cannot attend every concert, seminar, birthday party, or baby shower I am invited to! I only have so many spoons. I have to store up energy like a solar panel, child, so I can shine brightly later on! So, don't be too sad, for too long. When you get to be my age, you will have said "no" so many times, it will slip right off your tongue like a nice cold piece of homemade lemon pie! It's called self preservation. Explain to your friends nicely, and they will get it. Eventually. Until next time, Mamacitalucita

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@hopeful33250

@jfsherley

Hello, I appreciate your honesty in your post. I believe that what you are saying is that you do not like to pre-plan activities because you are sure that you will feel like keeping the commitment when the time comes. Is that correct?

Teresa

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@jfsherley, what helps me is having a mini-sized dry erase board on my kitchen table. At the top I write the day, month, date, and year. My "to do" list will have usually three things written in bright, but soothing colors. This lets me know that I have plenty of spoons left over if I will just focus on those three things. Time for a nap, time for a movie, time to go somewhere fun with my daughter! If someone invites me out for coffee or lunch, I can usually manage it. As long as I don't overdo it and try to pack too many tasks into the day. I hope this helps! You might try it and see how it goes. And if for whatever reason you still don't feel like going to that event, it is your right to bow out. You just be you. Your first priority is to take good care of you. Then you can save the world. But only if you feel like it. Oops. I made a joke! Who says Auties don't have a sense of humor?!! Love and hugs, Mamacitalucita

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@miilanna

Once again I don't fit in. I was diagnosed as a child, but am now old. Why limit it to those diagnosed late in life?

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Colleen Young, thank you very much.

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@hopeful33250

@jfsherley

Hello, I appreciate your honesty in your post. I believe that what you are saying is that you do not like to pre-plan activities because you are sure that you will feel like keeping the commitment when the time comes. Is that correct?

Teresa

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I wanted to add that there are ever so many tasks to complete that I don't even bother to write on the dry erase board, because they are a given. I can get quite a bit of work done in a day, actually. But if I were to post it as a MUST DO then I would get stressed. Besides, maybe I can convince someone else in my house to do it! Ha! Another bit of feeble humor. That's two in a row. Yay me. Love and light, Mamacitalucita.

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