Need to vent over scams and taking advantage of the vulnerable

@jenniferkr changing his phone is a great idea, I hadn’t thought of that. Now if I could only get him off Facebook 🫤

@akela09 can you restrict Facebook as if he was a child? I am unsure, gratefully, my husband does not do it.

Yes, I restricted my husband's access to any funds and his credit card (in my name) has a monthly limit so if he gets scammed it will not be for too much. I can up the credit limit as needed if for some reason his expenses are higher than expected with a simple phone call. As his dementia progressed I have also limited the calls he can receive on his cell phone by restricting to his contacts only. Any other calls do not ring. That has greatly reduced my anxiety on worrying about scams.

@jenniferkr I had not thought of that! Great advice I will definitely look into it.

So far I feel fortunate that my wife brings all (at least I think so) the scam requests to me for verification. I've made it clear that she is not "bothering" me and that I appreciate her asking me. Occasionally there will be a legitimate payment request (such as a medical co-pay). But she clearly cannot tell the difference. And fortunately she is unable to access personal and financial information to give out. I use a password manager with complicated passwords for all accounts, and she is unable to use the PW manager either.

@wctdoc1943 How very sad.....but you sound like my kinda guy; involved, vigilant, caring, unswerving in your loyalty to her and to your relationship, and willing to do the heavy lifting when needs be. Good for you!

I'm sorta there with my wife. She depends a lot on me due to her various conditions, not least of which are two recent falls, one resulting in a broken wrist, the second three days ago where she broke her humerus....and nothing humerous about it...at all. Fortunately, she has been 'good' lately, engaged, energetic, not quite so beset as in the past two years with aches and pains. But she does know to come to me for unusual events on line where she feels she needs to act, or is being pressed to. My oft-repeated rule for her is to tell the caller that she will call the purported institution/amazon/whateveritis directly herself, and to promptly hang up. No use in extending the conversation, and she knows to end it immediately that way. Had to run over to my dad's place ten years ago the same afternoon I had migrated his laptop to Win10. He got a scam call from 'Microsoft Services' saying they noticed he had a virus. He had actually already given them remote access when he called. I'm a long distance runner, and I literally ran all the way to his place a few blocks away. He had hung up per my instructions, and force-stopped his laptop. They called just as I entered their apartment. Told them to buzz off, and to not call again. Ran a malwarebytes scan just in case and his computer was squeaky clean. Whew!

@jenniferkr
How do you restrict calls to contacts only?

@gloaming We are their advocates and protectors. She sometimes thinks I am controlling (well, I am) but it is always in her (and our) best interest. And this is a non-sequitor, but I find it amazing that she has difficulty using the TV remote but can still operate her vehicle and find her way to and from her beauty salon once every 5 weeks (the only place she drives).

Thanks for your comments.

@wctdoc1943 How very sad.....but you sound like my kinda guy; involved, vigilant, caring, unswerving in your loyalty to her and to your relationship, and willing to do the heavy lifting when needs be. Good for you!

I'm sorta there with my wife. She depends a lot on me due to her various conditions, not least of which are two recent falls, one resulting in a broken wrist, the second three days ago where she broke her humerus....and nothing humerous about it...at all. Fortunately, she has been 'good' lately, engaged, energetic, not quite so beset as in the past two years with aches and pains. But she does know to come to me for unusual events on line where she feels she needs to act, or is being pressed to. My oft-repeated rule for her is to tell the caller that she will call the purported institution/amazon/whateveritis directly herself, and to promptly hang up. No use in extending the conversation, and she knows to end it immediately that way. Had to run over to my dad's place ten years ago the same afternoon I had migrated his laptop to Win10. He got a scam call from 'Microsoft Services' saying they noticed he had a virus. He had actually already given them remote access when he called. I'm a long distance runner, and I literally ran all the way to his place a few blocks away. He had hung up per my instructions, and force-stopped his laptop. They called just as I entered their apartment. Told them to buzz off, and to not call again. Ran a malwarebytes scan just in case and his computer was squeaky clean. Whew!