Doesn’t anyone else feel …… ?

Posted by sunnygardens @sunnygardens, Jun 25 6:27pm

Everyone seems so calm and reasonable on here. Am I the only one who gets fed up and irritable?
This evening two things are driving me nuts: one is the constant contrariness, increased from his normal contrariness. (My daughter once said he’s the most contrary person she’s ever met. That was three years ago. Before these unexplained symptoms began.) The other irritation (aaarrrghh!!!) is the nearly always saying “Oh, I know.” When clearly, until it was explained, he did NOT know. (This too is an increase from his normal level of knowing everything.)
It truly seems that all the incompatible characteristics are greatly exaggerated now.
As is my level of irritation, which certainly does not help.

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Caregivers: Dementia Support Group.

Profile picture for shmerdloff @shmerdloff

@kjc48
Glass too big.

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@shmerdloff Ah, a pragmatic or analytical view.....thanks for responding.
Best, Karla

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Profile picture for judimahoney @judimahoney

@dederickve
I typed in dementia clock in an internet search, then selected the filter for shopping.
I am happy with the large letters and numbers on the display screen. It wasn't a lot of money.

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@judimahoney They are great. I ordered two from Amazon. One is on his desk and one on the kitchen counter.

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Starting off the day feeling sad. I want to be the kind of person who always shows up to help when needed by family and friends but I sometimes can’t. I think it is the continuous caregiving that’s exhausting me.

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Profile picture for deme17z @deme17z

@sunnygardens Yes I think meds help plus my daily prayers to Jesus the Master Healer which I have a strong faith in. Thank God his dementia is not the critical types but its just age-related dementia hopefully slow progression.
He cant walk outside without the walker cuz also it makes him tired too soon.
You know my son tells me to leave him alone, or let hin eatwhat he wants but he is diabetic what he wants are sweets Icant let him except very rarely he can.
Yeah,physical theraphy is not improving his walking so I think its soon will be stopped.I try to socialize with my friends while my daughter keeps him for few hours.
Thank you for your helpful reply.

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@deme17z I'm reading this thread this morning, and I saw the comment, "you know my son tells me to leave him alone or let him eat what he wants." I'm reading a book "Diet for the Mind - the Latest Science on what to eat to prevent Alzheimer's and Cognitive Decline - by Dr. Martha Clare Morris, where's there's a section on Brainless Food. My husband isn't diabetic but a lot in this book applies to both Cognitive Decline and Diabetes. I agree with you, watching what our husband's eat is paramount. At least knowing the good with the not so good when meal planning. Since my husband's cognitive decline, I've tried to step up the vegetables and the fruits, less red meat, lean protein, a lot of roasted vegetables, and limited fried foods (he loves flash-fried fish and chips). So I watch the oils I use, try to focus on healthy ones, etc.
My husband loves sweets too, but I'm trying to moderate that too for a better brain-enhancing lifestyle (she talks about in the book). I find with my husband keeping his plate interesting, with foods that have flavor but limited salt, (why I roast a lot of vegetables, sweet potatoes, etc.) seems to help in his wanting to eat what I'm serving. Best, Karla

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Profile picture for grandmajoan @grandmajoan

Starting off the day feeling sad. I want to be the kind of person who always shows up to help when needed by family and friends but I sometimes can’t. I think it is the continuous caregiving that’s exhausting me.

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@grandmajoan a verse that’s always encouraged me to take care of myself: Love thy neighbor AS THYSELF. This equates to what the airlines tell us: Put on your own oxygen mask first.
Two years of counseling finally drilled into my head that taking care of myself as well as I would take care of another person is NOT selfish.
Please look for ways and opportunities to take care of yourself. Find and use ways to relax, have peace.
Caregiver burn-out is very real.
You are just as important as anyone else.

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Profile picture for kjc48 @kjc48

@deme17z I'm reading this thread this morning, and I saw the comment, "you know my son tells me to leave him alone or let him eat what he wants." I'm reading a book "Diet for the Mind - the Latest Science on what to eat to prevent Alzheimer's and Cognitive Decline - by Dr. Martha Clare Morris, where's there's a section on Brainless Food. My husband isn't diabetic but a lot in this book applies to both Cognitive Decline and Diabetes. I agree with you, watching what our husband's eat is paramount. At least knowing the good with the not so good when meal planning. Since my husband's cognitive decline, I've tried to step up the vegetables and the fruits, less red meat, lean protein, a lot of roasted vegetables, and limited fried foods (he loves flash-fried fish and chips). So I watch the oils I use, try to focus on healthy ones, etc.
My husband loves sweets too, but I'm trying to moderate that too for a better brain-enhancing lifestyle (she talks about in the book). I find with my husband keeping his plate interesting, with foods that have flavor but limited salt, (why I roast a lot of vegetables, sweet potatoes, etc.) seems to help in his wanting to eat what I'm serving. Best, Karla

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@kjc48 Thank you so much for this message. Helps me a lot.

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Profile picture for sunnygardens @sunnygardens

@deme17z of course you can’t let him eat foods that will damage him. It must be difficult though, if he’s asking for unhealthy foods.
Maybe your son is right about just letting your husband sleep or do what he wants. Yes, the diabetes might get worse if he doesn’t exercise. But if exercise is so tiring, and causes discomfort, or he didn’t want to, is it time to let him stop fighting the fatigue?
I’m so sorry you’re losing that companionship. It’s a help though, that you have your son and daughter visiting and helping.
Also……could you ask your pharmacist if the medications are making him more tired? Maybe the dose is too strong?
Thinking of you often and sending prayers your way.
🌻

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Profile picture for sunnygardens @sunnygardens

@grandmajoan a verse that’s always encouraged me to take care of myself: Love thy neighbor AS THYSELF. This equates to what the airlines tell us: Put on your own oxygen mask first.
Two years of counseling finally drilled into my head that taking care of myself as well as I would take care of another person is NOT selfish.
Please look for ways and opportunities to take care of yourself. Find and use ways to relax, have peace.
Caregiver burn-out is very real.
You are just as important as anyone else.

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@sunnygardens I have never looked at that verse in that light. Thank you.

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Profile picture for labrown @labrown

@sunnygardens I have never looked at that verse in that light. Thank you.

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@labrown
Ethics of the Fathers: If I am not for myself, who will be for me? If I am for myself alone, then why? And if not now, when? Hillel the Elder

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Profile picture for shmerdloff @shmerdloff

@labrown
Ethics of the Fathers: If I am not for myself, who will be for me? If I am for myself alone, then why? And if not now, when? Hillel the Elder

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@shmerdloff very excellent.

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