Doesn’t anyone else feel …… ?

@tracidw I need some !😌
For sure !

@dederickve how very very frustrating and irritating for you!
Probably at the stage your husband is, he wouldn’t sense sarcasm or impatience anyway.
Many dementia sufferers respond to a smile, no matter what the tone or words, depending on the stage of dementia.
Let me, a sarcastic, blunt, sometimes impatient person, say to you, you’re a GOOD PERSON.
Even Jesus got angry and impatient at times. 😁

@akela09 , you’ve described my situation and emotions to a T. However, thereyno escape because he follows me and continues his rants and accusations. I can’t take walks because I can’t leave him by himself. If I read he asks if I’m searching for a boyfriend. No socializing with family or friends since he doesn’t to be bothered by them. I do the house maintenance inside and out, cooking, take care of the finances, scheduling and driving to appointments yet I’m constantly reminded that I’m a lazy, know it all who doesn’t do anything to make his life easier. My days are filled with tears, anger and frustration and prayers for guidance and understanding. This forum has been a godsend to me, after each visit to this site I always leave feeling uplifted by all the support and sharing of information with one another.

,

We are all in this together, this sisterhood that we never asked to be in.

@dederickve
I ordered a special digital clock to combat the constant questions regarding what time, day of the week, date, month and year it is. It gives all that info on a readout about the size of a tablet. When my husband asks me those questions I point to the clock.

@kjc48

I echo what you said--that "even with our reasonable posts," we feel what @sunnygardens feels. So, I come here to this forum, to get recharged.

@dederickve Your situation with your husband sounds a lot like mine. My husband sleeps all day and will not get out of bed except to go to the bathroom which thankfully he can still do himself. He is incontinent of urine nonetheless which is primarily due to prostate surgery in the past but the dementia has made it worse. He does not complain about the disposable underwear. And will sometimes change it himself though he can have trouble with all the steps involved-sequencing issues.
When breakfast and dinner are ready I have to go into the bedroom and get him up because he will not come if I just call him or even go into his room and call him from the door. I have to get him up in stages. "Please sit up" and then extend my hand to help him. I have to remember that the dementia slows down his processing of what has been said. and allow him a minute or two before I say anything else. Once he is sitting I help him out of bed and direct him to the kitchen as he does not always know what direction to go in. Once he's in the kitchen and sees his chair and the food on the table he will sit down and eat. He is at the point in his dementia where visual clues are more meaningful than just words. As for having to do everything myself I think it has a silver lining. I am learning to do the things that I would eventually have to learn after he is gone even if he did not have dementia. I am proud of myself for doing our income taxes and managing our investments with the help of our financial planner. These are things that he would have done in the past. It can be overwhelming to have to learn these things and I can understand how you can resent this. It wasn't what we signed up for. I am trying to take it one day at a time and at the end of each day, remind myself of all the positives and try to learn something from the things that didn't go well. Keep posting here. It has done wonders for me in my quest to maintain my sanity and hope for better things to come. God bless you and your husband.

@kjc48

Thanks for you inspiration. I don't know how many garlic presses I have had to reorder--thanks to George and his intention of trying to be helpful! No matter how many times I remind him to put things in the right drawer, the reminders don't help.

@wmc

Yes, we are all in this together: "[Y]ou've dscribed my situation and emotions to a T." Yes, there is no escaping. Last night, George woke me up at 1:30 a.m. and he kept me up the rest of the night. When I went on the computer, he stood next to me and demanded that I shut it down. When I picked up a book to read, he slapped it out of my hands, etc. As you can see from all my posting today, this forum is my only outlet--and salvation.

Keep the faith. We are doing God's work.

George's Wife.

@hikingcaver

Where do you live? I wish we could start a babysitters' co-op. I love hiking but can't leave George alone.

@akela09

Amen!