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Missing the love of my life!
My beautiful, loving Tom passed away in February from this awful disease and very challenging journey and I want to start with a HUGE Thank You to all, with your advice, suggestions and just letting me vent and blow off steam since joining this wonderful support group 2 or 3 years ago. As weird as it may sound, all of this kept my sanity in tact, because we are all in the same boat... just different stages. Now that I look back, it was all of you that kept me going.... listening to what worked for you and giving it a try and some of it worked for us as well 🙂 and some thing didn't, but I didn't ever give up...one, because I couldn't, and two, because he was the love of my life and i would walk a thousand miles to get the cure....for ALL of us!!!
Tom as taken from me way to early and too young. He would have been 65 yesterday (I'm 61). I still want to come to this group to offer my advice or just to give you that big hug you deserve for all that you're going through, I miss him something awful...numb most days, heart aches everyday. Like someone said to me here not too long ago, "you're doing the best you can". And yes, I did, but it doesn't make the hurt any easier to bear. In a nutshell, keep doing your best, whatever that is for each and everyone of you! I'm wrapping my arms around each and every one of you and hugging you tight and saying ' you can do this' because our loved ones need us during their dark days. Thank you to all!!!
Strength, Peace, Love and Hugs
-Kathy
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Dear Kathy,
We are the same age. However, I’m caregiving for an elderly mother with dementia. Hearing about people losing their partner to dementia truly breaks my heart.
I feel your energy through this community- the love, compassion, and kindness you share. Thank you for being who you are. I’m relatively new here, but your post touched me deeply. Sending virtual hugs and support from afar.
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6 Reactionsbayviewgal, My condolences to you and your family. I know exactly how you feel, my wife passed on 1 Jan this year. At 90 YO, I am 92 and may never stop grieving. However I am attending grief support sessions anyway - it does help. Also am continuing to come to this site, because; now and then I feel that my experience along that six year journey of caring for my wife may allow me to lend support to others going through this terrible time in their life. The only advice I can offer you is to stay strong, keep those good memories at the front of your thoughts as you go through this new phase of life.
If you have not already done so, please find a grief support group, an in person group I've learned has provided me the best support, although I do participate in two others (one telephone, one online)- at my age, I need all of the support I can get.
All the best to you, stay strong, you are not alone.
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4 Reactions@fred1 Thank you for your wise counsel. You are a valuable source of advice and compassion as one who has completed the dementia journey but now lives with the grief of losing your wife.
I dread the day that this will happen to my husband of 45 years. When my mother passed away I did go to in-person grief counseling and I found it very valuable in helping put my loss in perspective. I was told that grief never really ends, with time you just learn to live with it. And I have found that to be true. The counselor also asked me to think about what my mother's legacy would be. This helped me focus on all the wonderful, loving lessons and connections she made throughout her life. That helped me as well. May God bless you always.
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