I relate to this post so i thought I'd offer my view. I disagree with hanging on to where you are by seeing professionals and/or support groups. Unfotunately, you need to take larger leaps. I agree that the best thing you can do to make your life worth living, is to help others. Simple little things go a long way, as we are losing the humanity. Careful not to go to extremes that are beyond resonable duties to feel good (i.e. fostering a child) .The more you do, the more natural it becomes and it spreads. In addition, now you need the big change. You need to step out of your comfort zone. Start a new life...something you're not familiar with and have to learn, whether that be career, hobby, sport, etc. This will open you up to a new group of people (friends, aquaintences, coworkers, teammates, etc. These are new lives and stories...and your old stories are new to them. Time to make some new memories for five years from now! I hope this helps someone.

Iam concerned about your statement that you cant take antidepressants because of the medication you have to take for afib. I urge you to get in touch with a good doctor that knows about drug interactions. There are drugs that you can take for depression that can be taken with anti afib. I have SVT...supraventricular tachycardia and take antidepressants. If this is the reason you arnt taking antidepressants, please contact your doctor.

@prescott

I'm sorry you're so unhappy. I hope you'll be able to find things that bring you happiness.

I take Diltiazen for SVT, and it doesn't have interactions with my antidepressants. If you can see a psychiatrist, they can help you find meds that can be taken together.

Jim

I think you may have helped me with your various suggestions, which all make sense. It's hard to push myself to reach out since I am depressed, although helping others is easier. It's just that big change you mention which is hard. I do, however, believe that seeing a professional can be helpful if you find the right person. As far as support groups, I haven't fared too well with them ... I find them depressing to be honest, rather than helpful. I guess we're all different. Thanks for your view.

I can really relate and coincidently, I have recently been given a diagnosis of Atypical Depression. I'm 55 and unemployed. I hate not having a job; it's what kept me going for all of my life. I do lots of volunteer work and I find that extremely "therapeutic". Helping other people takes your mind off of the awful way you feel.

I also have the same experiences with people who say they care. Somehow, I keep trying to find someone who is in the same boat as I am and really wants a friend (a "true" friend).

I'm sorry things are so difficult for you now. I liked what you said at the end, though. You said that you'd had a great life. You had something I didn't... I know they say not to live in the past, however, when you're in some of your darkest moments, why not try thinking back to the way you felt when things were good? Also, I wonder if there are some positive things from that time that you could use to make things better now. For example, what kinds of things were you skilled at doing or did you have anything you did for enjoyment? I realize that when you're depressed, it feels like all of that is so out of reach --- I've been through that a lot. But every now and then, I'll see a little light in the tunnel and start listening to music from the past or get out my coloring book. It helps me get through at least part of the day.

I hope that maybe something I said might be helpful. Even if you know that there are people, like me, who understand what you're going through and do care. Take care of yourself. Sharon

Hi, @prescott. Just checking in to see how things are going. I remember you were having some treatment for your heart and also that you were feeling kind of depressed. How are things going for you now?

Has anyone considered Ketamine? I'm trying to determine just how one goes about getting it prescribed. Robbinr

Hello @robbinr

I see that Ketamine has been discussed in our Chronic Pain discussion group, here is the link to that conversation, https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/welcome-please-introduce-yourself-welcome-to-the-new-chronic-pain-group-im/?pg=113#comment-74997

Also, I see on the webmd website there is an article about Ketamine use for depression, https://www.webmd.com/depression/news/20140923/ketamine-depression#1

Please read these links, it might help to educate you on the current ways it is used for treatment.

Teresa

The information regarding Ketamine states it works approximately 7 to 10 days and then an additional dosage is required. Studies have not determined the length of time that one might use Ketamine and/or what the long term effect might be at this time.

There are times when depression brings a person (e.g. me) to a place where I believe I cannot be effectively reached. Despite the very best efforts of those who love me most, I feel separated from humanity (in a sense) - separated, with understanding that no human can remove the suffering that bleeds through depression. Further, there are few people (outside of those with depression) that have objective sense about the succulent properties of depression on the brain.

For me, I use my left-brain to every potential I own. I remind myself that I am never alone. No matter religious beliefs, there are people who truly love me deeply. They may not have the salve to heal the burning wound - but intellectually, I remind myself that if they had that salve, they would bathe me in it incessantly.

That is love and personal care. The knowledge that if others could solve this problem on our behalf, they would tirelessly do so. But reality speaks louder - and the solution is with fate, or something true and present, but also something not fully in our awareness.

When low, low, I would encourage you to FIRST (and before seeking to help others) think about those who love you and would love to see you well. They may feel helpless or ineffective. They may feel their words are harmful. They may not know the depths of your lowness, or be able to relate to your words of despair. But it does not equate to not caring.

I think your first and best action (even if in private) is to thank and thank and thank those that love you and stick with you - even if there is a barrier that makes you feel ignored or misunderstood. Invite these people into your life and soul. Create space for the way they may feel (frustrated, so sad, hopeful, out of control).

In my experience, it invites richness to living. While we cannot know the specifics of the pains, joys and challenges of those we love - we care, we love them through their challenge, we try to make a positive difference.

Embrace those who love you (as they are - as we are); as imperfect healers - human. I believe sensing that connection (one likely present, but invisible in the midst of despair) is a ripe opportunity to be lifted. Not always, not perfectly.

The thought is to stay connected to those who love you most. Help them help you - they will then be more inclined to do the same, when they suffer.

That conscious presence - without judgment, but with knowledge that those who love you really do want to help and understand, is golden and necessary for each of us.