Managing Lifelong Mental Health as a Senior

Great suggestion Georgette. As mentioned above, Connect is organized in Groups. Here is the group directory: https://connect.mayoclinic.org/groups/ You can always access the group directory by going to the top of the webpage, click Discuss, then click Groups. (on a mobile device click the menu icon, then discuss, then groups.) We are constantly creating new groups as membership and activity grows.

Currently suicide discussions are found in the Mental Health group, as are discussions on depression, bi-polar, PTSD, anxiety, etc. Each of these may grow into a separate group (or sub-group) of its own. It is most helpful when members use well-described subject lines for a new discussion to help people know what is being discussed. Here are a few good examples:

- I survived suicide attempts http://mayocl.in/2dw4ZJv
- Mother of special need children losing her mind http://mayocl.in/2ow0B0C
- What to do for socially phobic depression and anxiety & bipolar http://mayocl.in/2dN8mMk

@gailb, in the end that's what matters, that we are happy with our choices. I did not mean to offend you but I misinterpreted your message and thought your turning away had something to do with you feeling that Christianity was unwelcoming to homosexual people. I realize that is true in some Christian sects and a friend of my daughter's whose parents are very religious but in a religion that apparently thinks sexual choices are a decision, have disowned their daughter and will not even attend her forthcoming wedding. I will never undestand this.
JK

Personally I have come to the conclusion that, "Live!" is the best choice. I used to feel like I didn't have a choice but I decided that's not true. It was a lie. I also believe it was demons that were talking and lying to me. Nobody talks about demons but I believe they exist. I learned to shut them out. So now I just want to die when God calls me. I think some sort of angel or spirit being is going to come for me. At church when someone is very sick the pastor says that the person is, "Going home." That's how we talk about death. It's going home. That's what I believe. I'm going home.

@ihatediabetes I totally agree with you. At one point prior to transplant they called me when they got results from the latest blood tests I had and said to get to the hospital immediately, not to drive to Boston but go to my local hospital. It turned out that my hemoglobin and hematocrit were dangerously low. They said to go local, not to drive to Boston. The doctor in the local ER said any lower and I could have had a cardiac arrest. After a very quick initial panic I felt calm and felt if this is my time then so be it. Obviously it was not. The doctor was uncomfortable with my situation so he called Boston and they told him to send me there in an ambulance. I ended up being there for 2 or 3 days and had a number of transfusions.
JK

Today I'm came across a remarkable poem on YouTube. I thought the words were very poignant for all members of Connect, but particularly striking for the conversation happening here. Thank you to Natalie Harris for giving me permission to share her work here.
https://www.youtube.com/embed/zCN-gAqvimk
An excerpt from "I Am Still Human"
by Natalie Harris

I share my lessons so you can learn; that doesn't mean I'm not learning.
I share my joys so you can smile; that doesn't mean I don't cry.
I share my victories so you can have hope; that doesn't mean I don't struggle.
I share my visions so you can see too; that doesn't mean I'm not doubtful.
I share my words from numerous friends; that doesn't mean I don't have enemies.
I share my experiences so you don't feel alone; that doesn't mean I'm not lonely.
I share my illnesses so you can relate; that doesn't mean I don't feel stigma.
I share my love so you can feel loved; that doesn't protect me from hate.
I share my recovery so you can believe; that doesn't mean I'm cured.
I share how I breathe so you can too; that doesn't mean I don't feel suffocated.
I share because that's who I am; that doesn't mean all will agree.
I share my vulnerability so you can feel safe; that doesn't mean I don't have insecurities.
I share my faith so you can find peace; that doesn't mean I don't have demons.

I might add a line to Natalie's poem especially for Connect:
I share to find people who are similar to me; that doesn't mean we won't find differences.

@georgette12 Sounds very interesting, please let us know how it goes! Teresa

@contentandwell @ihatediabetes, oy vay, doctas are gonna kill us all. I leave for my appt in a few minutes. Thanks for checking on me. I dont expect a magic bullet. You ladies take it easy. Judy

So i did go to the psychiatrist who lives in tele viv . that would have been last monday. And i had a good experience. But i have again had difficulty in comminicating on line or on email or answering voice mail or anything to do with any sort of communucation. That has to do with making sure i am in a safe place during a communication. I am not in a safe communication zone with many out of state friends... And my son who is still alive...who is the brother of my son who died. I have a 3rd son who is my deceased son's half brother. They have a different father. Both of their fathers have died. My deceased son's father died of lung disease. But my youngest son, from a different marriage, ...... His own father died by suicide as well. More later.

@georgette12 Thanks for sharing your experience with the out of the country psychiatrist. I'm glad to it was a good experience for you in spite of the problems you have with that kind of communication. If I may ask, how often will you meet with her in this manner? I hope that you continue to heal. You have experienced a lot of trauma and have survived so much. i wish you well. Teresa

Hi again. I never mind anyone asking, teresa, as i really think a large part of my mission or reason on earth is to share. For me, anyway, i personally don't want to just take up space. But that is only me.
My grief counselor is named celia. She and the staff of Axis, which i believe is only located here in colorado, connect with dr. Andrew Rosenbach in tele viv once a week by skype. So that way they can discuss each person and how to proceed. Dr. Rosenbach sees me, at least, on scheduled appts once a month. His scheduled appts are difficult to get, he says, so he asked me to be sure to schedule ahead of time. He emphasized to me on skype that at any time i feel worse...to tell the office or celia...and they will call him that day. He prefers not to have me (his patient) wait.

Celia, i see once a week. Because she specializes in complex PTSD and EMDR ... I am going to her as opposed to a counselor working with other mental health issues. Interestestingly. Though, based on past trauma catching up to present trauma and complications of it all, she is checking with dr. R as tonhow to approach it. I kind of thought i was going because my son killed himself and i couldn't save him. But i forgot that i tried to save my youngest son's father also. He, his father, died when he was only six. I guess i just figured that stuff was in the past.

I got my youngest son the best help possible. But when he became 18, i had no control over how he chose to live his life. Anyway, his dad killed himself. when his dad was 40 years old. So when my youngest son passed that 40th year, and he himself was still alive, he had a vision of his deceased father and a conversation as to why his dad killed himself...and what my son was to do now with the rest of his life. So my so is following a path that he thinks his father planned for him. It's disturbing. But, again, maybe that is what happens as a result of suicide and the people left behind.

Gonna go get a hair cut. Love to all.