Don't be too hard on yourself, @talie Denial, wishful thinking, or just coping. It makes no real difference. It is just how we get along each day of the 'one-foot-in-front-of-the-other' journey that is caregiving. There are many days when I put plodded along not having any notion of where the path we were on was leading or where it would end.

When it came to my wife I hung on each and every change! Large or tiny. Always wondering, analyzing, etc. to see if I could discern whether it was a forever change or not. In her case there was never any turning back in the sense that we never saw her 'old normal' again, we just had to move on to whatever 'new normal' was thrown our way,

I wish you continued strength, courage, & peace!

I could relate to your post of not knowing if this is the new normal. It is confusing for me, and as I try to problem solve , I get so tired mentally . And sad. Then I struggle to get back to my centre. My counsler is currently stressing the important of breaks and respite. I have one now for 3 days in my own home. It's hard to enjoy because of the exhaustion and sadness I'm trying to shake off, I'm sure some writing and a good movie to cry with will help unload as well as a walk. Well, I've just created my 3 priorities for today's precious day of respite. I hope a day of peace for you and good self care

Thank you for your words, they really help me too. How fragile life seems at times. The fleeting moments of joy and happy, which I and I believe , many of us crave, do lie around us, it's just getting that perspective aligned with self care. Truly spiritualilty at a black belt level. Gentle smile.

Hi My name is Candace and my Mom is 98 and in assisted living. I have trouble with the repeating and obsession with time and dates. Tried lots of tricks in hopes they will help but nothing. I get phone calls starting by 8am each morning and several more during the day wondering if the aides will come and get her for meals and bring her back. My sister and I take turns to visit her everyday so it isn't like she has no company. I get so frustrated and just wish someone could give me some pointers on how deal with all of this. Mom is in good physical health and does not look 98! Thanks for any advice!

Hi Candace: Yes it is frustrating to repeat and repeat each day what you said not more then 30 seconds ago. Memory is so personalized and each person has an obsession. My husband wants to be sure he knows all the channels he can get on T. V. This goes on and on and so I have written all of his favorites, but even then there are other things he just does not understand. It is getting very difficult to
have a conversation. If there is one thing to be learned, that is patience. You can get some advice from this site and hopefully someone
to talk to that is experiencing the same events as you. Good luck. Ozy

Thank you! I know patience is the key, will keep working on that.

Hi Terry (@madtrav), We haven't heard from you for a while, so I thought I'd check in. How are you doing? How's your mom?

I decided I needed to be closer to my daughter and her family. I also decided to stop being a caregiver and just be a daughter to my parents. 

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I'd like to join this group.

Hello @hutch, and thank you for jumping in to the caregiving for dementia sufferers conversation. By replying to the post you have joined the discussion. If you are replying by email notifications, I suggest clicking on VIEW & REPLY at the bottom of your email so you can always see the full discussion in the order of responses. Is there anything you would like to ask the group?