Husband diagnosed MCI: He is in denial and personality is changing

I am adding to what I wrote earlier about ghosting ; I wrote that is is passive aggressive. But it is worse than that in terms of the emotional toll it takes. I believe that ghosting is warranted only when someone’s physical or mental health is in severe danger. When facing something or someone who is potentially life threatening it is appropriate to ghost a perpetrator as well as call for help, such as reaching out to the police
Being ghosted by friends and family is unconscionable. Completely unacceptable. I have been ghosted in the past and it created such a feeling of hopelessness and confusion until I realized that I would not take these actions personally. Those who do the ghosting are themselves in pain, denial, fear. Who knows what. I am sorry to hear that you and your wife had had to take this journey without the support you deserve.
Some people are courageous and some people are not.
Keep up your courage my friend

This is very hard on children too. They will be going through their own stages of grief and one is anger. It might help to sit down and allow feelings to be expressed and let them know what this is like for you both and that you need their support now.
I’ve been so used to making everybody’s life better that it was hard for me to let my children know how I felt and that we need them.
I’m also letting friends know we need them.
So far everyone is ok but I do hear that as things progress and my husband is harder to be with, friends can disappear.
The ghosting is sad. I’m so sorry but hope your children come around.

Thank you!!!

Staying social is becoming more difficult. Also married 50 years, also husband with MCI. I have friends and take some classes…he does not. Wish he could find something to become involved with. I suggest the Y, volunteering at church, yet he doesn’t actually make the moves, though he sounds interested….We do take walks together. A day at a time…and I’ve always been a patient person, but some days recently I feel it’s not going to be enough.

Last year we took a two week Viking cruise. Steve did great- why? It had all the elements he needed- daily gym, daily enrichment and tours, daily healthy food, and social with people our age and you could see several with impairments. It was relaxing for both of us. I came home and thought he needs the gym, I want to schedule some field trips like to the art museum, zoo, other museums etc. I can be a bore and a boss so have to be creative. I’ve also invited people for dinner and they enjoy it and so does Steve although he has lost his filter and tact which could alienate people.
A neighbor of our picks him up for a weekly class on various subjects and it worked out great but last week, Steve lost his phone then his wallet and it stressed the friend out. I’m hoping he will still pick S up.
And as I write this it is exhausting and I find I need to have my own friend time. Can’t do a cruise all the time and I’m still doing everything so planning enrichment is another thing to do.
And he can not plan. I need to make sure everything is scheduled etc. His desk that used to be organized is now a mess. My life is a cloud with a ray of sunshine- sometimes that’s hard.

I face a similar situation
Andy does fine if everything is planned. He is starting to confuse people who don’t know he has MCI
because he will forget having met them ( we just moved to a new condominium community) or will repeat himself. I am his social director and he would easily stay at home reading the paper were I not to make sure he gets out.
We moved five months ago and he still has trouble remembering our new address.
But he can recite entire sections of The Raven by Edgar Allen Poe from memory.

You need to have your own time it is essential.
I am a truth teller. Until now. I will sometimes tell my husband I am meeting a girlfriend for lunch when all I am doing I is going for a walk alone.
He gets hurt if I want to walk without him……

It is so helpful to read these comments from spousal caregivers. My husband and I have been married for 53 years, and he was diagnosed with MCI last spring and Alzheimer's in November after a spinal tap. I would say he is handling the diagnosis much better than I am. I think he is just resigned to it, and that's where the problem lies with me. I would so much like him to take doctor (and my) advice to get more exercise and get more involved socially. But he doesn't--in fact, he never has. This upsets me more than ever, and I find myself getting annoyed and even angry on a daily basis because he doesn't seem to be trying to do anything to help himself. At the same time, I'm exhausted because I've been taking on more and more and more of what used to be his responsibilities. Our two children live far from us, so they can't be very helpful for giving me a break. I try to keep my temper, but it's hard.

I don't know anything, but wondering if Dr might prescribe some meds to help with angry outbursts. Maybe he is angry with himself that he can't do something or remember something. My brother would have crying episodes, Dr said he might have moments of clarity that upset him, and then goes back into his own world.

Yes I am in charge of the calendar and I am the social director also. He has trouble with dates and time. One thing he is always motivated to do is go to the gym which is also social.