Loneliness: Why am I depressed?

I have found it hard to discover such places. But I keep trying. At my Unitarian church, many people shy away from expressions of anger, even if it's about social justice. Recently, I was invited to give a sermon, I chose to speak abaout "Anger: Justified or Unjustified?" People seemed to like it. But I still find it a struggle to find people who are not afraid of it.

@esthermayo Something that crossed my mind as I just read your post was this: There are certain emotions that people automatically attach to "negative". Such as anger, or sadness, or jealousy. etc. Perhaps in these current times of uncertainty, several of us are hanging on to positive feelings. And many may not want to address or acknowledge anger/frustration/rage over something they feel powerless to change.

Do you think this has a part to play in finding safe places to express all emotions?
Ginger

I do. In my church, there is a lot of emphasis o n compassion and gratitude, which are all good things -- especially now. But being frustrated or angry seems pretty normal to me. Depends on how people around you respond to it.

I am also depressed. 2.5 years ago I had a kidney removed. That made my depression worse. Life can suck. I see a therapist and it’s helpful. I also have a dog and he is my best friend.

Hi there @azkidney57. I am so glad you have a dog. I think they always know when you need them. When I had my cervical surgery and was in bed for quite a few days, my Cavalier Roxie would cuddle up next to me on the bed for hours. Then all of a sudden she would look at me with an expression that said, "Are you ever getting up?" She got so excited when I did.

Enjoy your friendly dog and take a chance on a human being once in a while. They can help also.

May you have happiness and the causes of happiness.
Chris

I agree. But it's complicated. I was once part of a group where several people said they were told by their parents not to bring up negative feelings at dinner time. As for me, I'm still looking for more of those safe places. This seems to be a place where it is o k.

i hadn't thought of that and i can't imagine doing what? i might like that though.

So sorry to hear about the stroke. I’m sure that would make things hard. Keep on reaching out and I like the suggestion of volunteering on line by the moderator. All the best. 💕

I have been depressed for a very long time, think years. (Off and on) . I have had dogs, which brought me so much joy and comfort. But on February 7 my little Shi Tzu passed away at home. He got up from the end of the couch and started walking and fell off.
I asked my son to.Please put him back on the couch, he was just laying on the floor. My son bent down to get his attention, and he said, "oh mom, I think he's gone". He picked up his lifeless little body and his head hung down like it never would in life. My bff was gone, and my heart was broken. I had been in the hospital for 3 days before that, and I knew he wasnt well. I went home on the night of the 6th and he died the next morning. Now I am so untethered, and loose I don't know what to do with myself. I still have his food, medicine, coat, etc. He is all around me, but I can't touch him. My heart is full of longing for him, and my arms are so aching and empty. My grown kids don't understand this i think. They say they do but I'm not so sure. Ive been on shaky ground since 2006 and now since losing Harley its so much worse. I'm so lonely, no friends, isolation. I want another dog and ive been looking but my kids say no, not right now. Their opposition is normal. I let Harley mess up the living room rug. He was very hard to train, especially through my depression. I didnt want to move..so I don't blame them. But, I hurt so much. I'm afraid that without a dog I will decline further. I'm 70 years old in a few days and I think another dog would help me immensely, help me wake up a little, out of my depression. I don't know if they realize truly how fragile I am right now. I feel like I'm at a crossroad where I could go this way or that. What do I do?? Has anyone ever been in this situation? I think I will get Harley's little body back from the vet today. Can anyone help me?
Thanks for letting me bend your ear.

Hi. I am 70 years old also. We lost our precious emotional support dog May 30, 2021. We had a house fire when we were at a movie theater. Our cell phones were off during the movie when the fire department was trying to reach us. My neighbor called me on our drive home to tell me Belah was 'gone.' I thought she meant Belah had run away, but she died in the fire. We lost everything, but losing Belah was by far the greater loss. She was only 5 years old and loved by everyone who met her. She was my bff. I trained her myself. Our neighbors cried with us over our and their loss. We put a memorial on the property and laid her to rest on the property. My husband said burying her was the hardest thing he has ever had to do. He is 70 yrs old also. I thought I was dying from a broken heart. My heart shutdown--to keep from breaking, I think--but the emotions were raw and we were so vulnerable. I cried day after day, I couldn't sleep at night. We were homeless which actually was a blessing because we had no home without her anyway. She was our 'child' and our life. She kept us active and kept us exploring life. I could not take the grief and pain so after 2 weeks of going from motel to motel, I called the breeder that we had gotten Belah from and told her what happened. She said she had some 6 week-old puppies that would be ready for a new home. We bought one and named her Emma. Emma is not Belah and she 'weathered' the homelessness and riding in the car a great deal extremely well. Although I still grieve for Belah, Emma has done so much for me and my husband, as if she knew we were in grief. It took me awhile to not feel guilty about caring for another dog and since she is not Belah it took time but I am so much better emotionally and dealing better with life and my depression having Emma in our life. We have no regrets about getting Emma.