What do you do when someone is in denial about their hearing loss?

Posted by mari @mari, Jan 16, 2020

I was reading on here about BFF and mates Refusing to get tested when their hearing is really bad – their frustration. Where are those posts?

Agree, seeing the ENT about possible ear wax buildup is a great first step!

REPLY
@kirstenhw

OMG this is my mom in a nutshell! I did finally get her tested and she has HAs in both ears and now refuses to wear them. She’s been diagnosed with mild cognitive impairment and I know for a fact she’s profoundly depressed – she has an Rx for anti-depressants that she used to take but now won’t do that either. It infuriates me. I deeply love my mom but I feel like she’s actively avoiding helping herself.

Jump to this post

She is not avoiding helping herself, it just looks that way. Let her know you love her and that you see how scary her world has become for her. She is afraid and the world isn't making sense anymore. I hope she is in a safe situation with loving caregivers who can take the time to coax her into taking the meds and using the HAs. You're such an amazing daughter, you care so deeply. Breathe through the hard moments, celebrate the decent moments and take good care of yourself.

REPLY

Have had H Aids for 2 years. Very unhappy with them. Extraneous noise makes conversation extremely difficult. One on one is fine. Don't expect too much.

REPLY
@91retiree

Have had H Aids for 2 years. Very unhappy with them. Extraneous noise makes conversation extremely difficult. One on one is fine. Don't expect too much.

Jump to this post

Welcome to Connect, @91retiree. I thought you might like to read this Mayo Clinic article:
– Hearing aids: How to choose the right one https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/hearing-loss/in-depth/hearing-aids/art-20044116
Would you share a few more details about yourself? What type of hearing aid do you have? Have you consulted with an audiologist?

REPLY
@kanaazpereira

Welcome to Connect, @91retiree. I thought you might like to read this Mayo Clinic article:
– Hearing aids: How to choose the right one https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/hearing-loss/in-depth/hearing-aids/art-20044116
Would you share a few more details about yourself? What type of hearing aid do you have? Have you consulted with an audiologist?

Jump to this post

Did all that. Was prescribed Widex hearing aids. Unhappy in crowed situations. Hoping for future improvements.

REPLY

Just jumping back in to Mayo Clinic Connect as I've not received any posts for over a month. Not sure why. Just wanted to point that out before commenting.

A big issue we who have hearing loss deal with is negative stigma. Why is there such negative stigma related to hearing loss? It runs pretty deep, but is partly because attitudes about hearing loss and deafness have evolved over generations that often categorized hearing loss as an affliction of the old and feeble minded, or of the dumb. Dumb meaning not quite with it or stupid. Many of us grew up hearing the term 'Deaf and dumb', which is a very negative statement. OK. It sounds like something from the dark ages now, but it was very common not all that long ago. Today, we have manufacturers and sellers of hearing aids marketing the kind of denial that furthers that sort of language. Have you ever seen an advertisement for a hearing aid that doesn't tell you how small it is? How no one will know you're wearing it? Etc.?? Isn't it time to start advertising the benefits without all that negativity? Marketing denial just furthers the stigmas that prevent so many from admitting they have trouble hearing, much less getting help for it.

REPLY

I had a damaged inner ear because of big gun explosion in the military service..left ear is just decoration. I wanted the VA to provide them and they finally did.. rechargable, with Bluetooth / microphone that works with my smartphone.. the left hearing aid receives sound but sends it to the right ear to amplify.. using the volume control is important .. as one gets used to living in a less noisey world.. I still use closed captioning on the TV to compensate for English accents and such. I would always keep the person that I wanted to hear on my right, good ear side… The phone using that Bluetooth remote microphone is really great.. prices are going down, I would never buy from those who have such big advertisements… Get a really good audiology Dept. Like Mayo as they test for balance too..

REPLY
@julieo4

Just jumping back in to Mayo Clinic Connect as I've not received any posts for over a month. Not sure why. Just wanted to point that out before commenting.

A big issue we who have hearing loss deal with is negative stigma. Why is there such negative stigma related to hearing loss? It runs pretty deep, but is partly because attitudes about hearing loss and deafness have evolved over generations that often categorized hearing loss as an affliction of the old and feeble minded, or of the dumb. Dumb meaning not quite with it or stupid. Many of us grew up hearing the term 'Deaf and dumb', which is a very negative statement. OK. It sounds like something from the dark ages now, but it was very common not all that long ago. Today, we have manufacturers and sellers of hearing aids marketing the kind of denial that furthers that sort of language. Have you ever seen an advertisement for a hearing aid that doesn't tell you how small it is? How no one will know you're wearing it? Etc.?? Isn't it time to start advertising the benefits without all that negativity? Marketing denial just furthers the stigmas that prevent so many from admitting they have trouble hearing, much less getting help for it.

Jump to this post

Well SAID! I am wearing my cochlear processors proudly. I am blond and got my N7 in Black. I’m so thrilled to understand speech again. I’ve always worn my HAs out and proud and have educated so many folks about hearing loss. It IS about time for HA manufacturers to ditch the stigmatizing language and focus on how wonderful assistive devices for hearing are!

REPLY

@julieo4, @91retiree I have Starkey hearing aids.. they fit over the ear, but because they are rechargeable I have a recharge box that I carry… It is about 2" high, and 3" x 4" (it has internal batteries to charge the hearing aid even when not plugged in). It is not easily misplaced.. There are magnetic docking stations for each hearing aid. You can get one of those finder chips to stick on to it …but it is plugged into the charging station most of the time..
I am perfectly happy not hearing a lot of what goes on around me… a few times someone will be angered if I do not respond… but with that I have often said that a comment really wasn't warranted… as what they said was unimportant and not pertaining to the issue.. Now that I have good hearing aids and use them more, I realize that half of what folks say in conversation really doesn't make a difference… but it's nice so one can seem interested and courteous.

REPLY
@ken82

@julieo4, @91retiree I have Starkey hearing aids.. they fit over the ear, but because they are rechargeable I have a recharge box that I carry… It is about 2" high, and 3" x 4" (it has internal batteries to charge the hearing aid even when not plugged in). It is not easily misplaced.. There are magnetic docking stations for each hearing aid. You can get one of those finder chips to stick on to it …but it is plugged into the charging station most of the time..
I am perfectly happy not hearing a lot of what goes on around me… a few times someone will be angered if I do not respond… but with that I have often said that a comment really wasn't warranted… as what they said was unimportant and not pertaining to the issue.. Now that I have good hearing aids and use them more, I realize that half of what folks say in conversation really doesn't make a difference… but it's nice so one can seem interested and courteous.

Jump to this post

KEN82 @ how much Starkey aids cost? i saw there r many models – but, $? were yours. I recently got Costco H A and misplaced them twice.

REPLY
@lizzy102

Well SAID! I am wearing my cochlear processors proudly. I am blond and got my N7 in Black. I’m so thrilled to understand speech again. I’ve always worn my HAs out and proud and have educated so many folks about hearing loss. It IS about time for HA manufacturers to ditch the stigmatizing language and focus on how wonderful assistive devices for hearing are!

Jump to this post

My original Freedom CI processor was blue. I had a blue hearing aid to go with it. My hair was short then. My N6 processor is gray, but I still have a blue hearing aid. It's 15 years later. I now have long hair, not to cover my hearing devices but because I needed/wanted a change. The other day I met a man who was struggling with hearing loss. He was with his wife. We got talking about hearing loss, etc. His hearing aids were typically visible. I asked if he had considered a cochlear implant, and took off my processor to show him what it looked like. His wife's comment was "Oh that would never work for him because people would see it, they don't notice yours because of your long hair." It was all I could do to not walk into the next salon and ask for a haircut. We talked for a while because he was interested in my CI. She continued talk about the 'visibility' issue, as if hearing wasn't important.. It's really sad that this is a barrier to people seeking the help available.

REPLY
@julieo4

My original Freedom CI processor was blue. I had a blue hearing aid to go with it. My hair was short then. My N6 processor is gray, but I still have a blue hearing aid. It's 15 years later. I now have long hair, not to cover my hearing devices but because I needed/wanted a change. The other day I met a man who was struggling with hearing loss. He was with his wife. We got talking about hearing loss, etc. His hearing aids were typically visible. I asked if he had considered a cochlear implant, and took off my processor to show him what it looked like. His wife's comment was "Oh that would never work for him because people would see it, they don't notice yours because of your long hair." It was all I could do to not walk into the next salon and ask for a haircut. We talked for a while because he was interested in my CI. She continued talk about the 'visibility' issue, as if hearing wasn't important.. It's really sad that this is a barrier to people seeking the help available.

Jump to this post

julie04: You are so correct about the stigma with hearing aids! I have been wearing them for 8 years now as my hearing has deteriorated I do not mind having them show! It actually helps the people around us realize that we have an issue and they become mindful of it. If I needed to wear headphones to hear better I would be all for it. The most important thing is our relationships with family friends and neighbors and hearing what they have to say is very important! Several weeks ago I was at a conference in Chicago in a venue with 800 plus people and struggled somewhat in that environment. There were many people I could see had hearing aids and when I asked them if they could hear they shook their heads no! That is part of the problem….need to speak up and let them know! I’ll get off my soapbox now! God bless your day!

REPLY
Please sign in or register to post a reply.