What is the funniest thing a doctor has ever said to you?

Posted by scottbeammeup @scottbeammeup, Jun 24 2:59pm

I had a good rapport with my (now retired) General Practitioner. Once, I went to see him for food poisoning. It was campylobacter and he gave me antibiotics. They worked but I got clostridium dificil from the antibiotics and he said I had to take Vancomycin, the antibiotic of last resort.

I asked what happens if it doesn't work? "Well, Scott, then I'm going to have to take you out back and shoot you." He said it so calmly and dryly that I couldn't stop laughing.

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ouch89 | @ouch89 | Sep 21 8:29pm

In reply to @pattymc "At 90 I would rather use the pain meds,,Good ones" + (show)

I'm leaning that way, thanks for replying. Being in chronic pain it's difficult to make a rational decision. Looking back prior to my first TKR I had discomfort but nothing like the pain I have today. I had no problem getting about and accomplish my daily activities, but since my first surgery my mobility has been compromised. I should have done my homework and explored the many various interim pain relievers.

quilterfingers | @quilterfingers | Sep 22 10:31am

Doc said "give me your soul/sole." He was my podiatrist. So he ripped my sole out of my shoe and said look your foot is right up against the end of your shoe. You need a fingers width between toe & tip of the shoe. so I went & bought shoes that are too big.
For a second I thought he was the "devil"
Maybe it is not that funny but it really happened to me.

sbtheplumber1 | @sbtheplumber1 | Sep 23 5:31pm

Without getting me out of the wheelchair to check me after a back fusion told him I could rub my tailbone and get testicle pain ( that wasn’t there before the surgery) he says you don’t have that ! I regret now not standing up and giving him a kick and let him feel the pain that I’ve now dealt with for about 2-1/2 years

premi | @premi | Sep 28 1:01pm

In reply to @mikaylar "This was said to my friend, but I thought it was worth passing along. She is..." + (show)

@mikaylar The best reply I have ever heard,that to an one liner

premi | @premi | Sep 28 1:10pm

In reply to @bunstuffer "Back when I was in the army, you had to maintain a certain weight range (this..." + (show)

@bunstuffer I am shorter than you,wish someone would tell me that and cheer me up

cindi210 | @cindi210 | Oct 20 9:33am

At 50 I started feeling all kinds of new aches and pains. It seemed like my 20/20 eyesight changed overnight and I felt tired more often. I was convinced I had something catastrophic, like a brain tumor. Dramatic huh. After I described my list of symptoms the doctor opened a drawer, grabbed a handful of confetti, threw it in the air and yellled "Yipee! Welcome to aging Ms. Cindi!! It's not for sissies.". His response was so much better than a more serious reality check about aging.

relieffrompain | @relieffrompain | Oct 30 12:57pm

She said, "This won't hurt."

rollingf | @rollingf | Oct 31 10:08pm

Once I had growths on the back of my ear. I showed my doc during an annual visit. He had "baby doc" with him. She asked, "What caused the growths? Is he out in the sun too much? He answered, "No, he is never in the sun. He's had too many birthdays." She replied, "What?" I answered her, "He said I am getting old!"

adr | @adr | Nov 1 8:17am

It's just a little pinch! Ha

diverdown1 | @diverdown1 | Nov 1 8:56am

"I think you are ovulating..." While I was bent over, could not urinate and in severe pain from what turned out to be 3 kidney stones, that had traveled into my bladder and were stuck.