Vaginal atrophy and painful intercourse: What helps?

I used premarin cream twice a week & it worked great. I can no longer take it due to the anastrozole I'm taking for breast cancer (lumpectomy stage 1A). I dried up just like you & intercourse is impossible & my partner understands, we just find other ways, forplay etc., it works. You just have to use it right, twice a week to keep your self pliable. Also, use a very small amount. I'd change doctors who are more knowledgeable on HRT. It's also been said that if you have taken HRT right after menopause you should be fine, but I'd only recommend the cream in very small dose.

I have struggled with the very same problem for at least 8 years. It's been so awful and at first I got nowhere. I talked with my gynecologist and my primary care doctor during that time and received very unsatisfactory answers. I felt like no one took me seriously. Finally, I was prescribed Estrace vaginal cream that I used and it did help although I still experienced some pain with intercourse on occasion. My partner and I were already using a lubricant during sex before I started having the problems.

I learned about the Mayo Clinic Women's Menopause Clinic from my nurse practitioner at Mayo Clinic. I have been seen at that clinic and it's been so very helpful. I feel like someone finally gets what I've been going through. I've seen a psychologist who specializes in sex therapy, education nurses who explain different types of vaginal moisturizers and lubricants and a nurse practitioner who did a complete exam with me holding a mirror so I could see what she saw as she educated me.

If there is a clinic like this near you I highly recommend it. Because I had endometrial cancer I can no longer use the estrogen cream (applied topically only to the lower 1/3 of the vagina by the way - instructions I got from Mayo Clinic that were different from what is on the package). I now use non-estrogen vaginal moisturizers a few times a week that work for me. And here is one other tip. My partner uses Ohnuts (I bought as a gift for us) which reduce the depth of penetration. We have both needed to change our expectations about sex . It's been more difficult for me than for him because like you I loved what my body did in the past and just let it do that. I can't do that anymore.
https://ohnut.co/
I hope this helps. It is a constant struggle to find out what will work for you but I think it's possible.

I have had the same problem needing to correct atrophy-related symptoms, and I have none of those. My reasons are purely selfish. I am 57 now, but was maybe 54 when Vaginal Atrophy hit me. I say "hit me" because it happened overnight. My husband and I have always enjoyed a very active sex life, and one night it was great as always, and the next, it felt like he was wearing a condom made of tiny knives slicing me up. All at once, fine one day, and you can never have great sex again the next. I just cried and cried because my husband has turned to younger women a few times now to satisfy his needs because I simply could not do it anymore. It is ruining my marriage. Like someone else said I first talked to my primary who had nothing relevant to say at all and then a nurse practitioner/gyn that is a sex/menopause specialist. My primary ridiculously told me to try lubricants. There does not exist a lubricant that can help this kind of pain unless it has the stuff they use at the dentist in it, then maybe. The specialist told me it was vaginal atrophy, and prescribed estradiol vaginal cream. As I began to use it, it did help a little, but not that much, and a side effect I noticed was my hair began to fall out. Numerous professionals have told me that is not possible, that estrogen helps hair regrow, not the opposite but when I read the entire paper that came with it, in the fine print, hair loss was listed as a possible side effect. So then I had to choose between my hair falling out in patches or a better sex life but still not perfect. So I stopped taking it. Now when we want to be intimate, I take 6 or 8 Ibuprofins and have 3 shots of Tequila, and I can get through it and sometimes actually enjoy it for a little while. In the end, I am still so sad because vaginal atrophy literally ruined my life. Now I've gained some weight, and I feel like I am not a real woman anymore. I feel unattractive and now I have trust issues with my husband who says "you didn't just expect me to never have sex again just because you can't, did you? " Yep, that's my man, I can't believe more people in their 50's don't off themselves. Everything you care about is gone, including good sex, slim body, kids have all moved out, I have no friends near me anymore, and now my husband cheats occasionally and I'm supposed to be ok with that because I guess it's my fault. I need help with this issue. Real help before it's too late for me. Any suggestions at all would be welcomed appreciatively. I sound like a baby. With so many of you having way more serious things going on like cancers, endometriosis, and urology issues, I am so sorry I feel ridiculous even bringing this up.

I have had the same problem needing to correct atrophy-related symptoms, and I have none of those. My reasons are purely selfish. I am 57 now, but was maybe 54 when Vaginal Atrophy hit me. I say "hit me" because it happened overnight. My husband and I have always enjoyed a very active sex life, and one night it was great as always, and the next, it felt like he was wearing a condom made of tiny knives slicing me up. All at once, fine one day, and you can never have great sex again the next. I just cried and cried because my husband has turned to younger women a few times now to satisfy his needs because I simply could not do it anymore. It is ruining my marriage. Like someone else said I first talked to my primary who had nothing relevant to say at all and then a nurse practitioner/gyn that is a sex/menopause specialist. My primary ridiculously told me to try lubricants. There does not exist a lubricant that can help this kind of pain unless it has the stuff they use at the dentist in it, then maybe. The specialist told me it was vaginal atrophy, and prescribed estradiol vaginal cream. As I began to use it, it did help a little, but not that much, and a side effect I noticed was my hair began to fall out. Numerous professionals have told me that is not possible, that estrogen helps hair regrow, not the opposite but when I read the entire paper that came with it, in the fine print, hair loss was listed as a possible side effect. So then I had to choose between my hair falling out in patches or a better sex life but still not perfect. So I stopped taking it. Now when we want to be intimate, I take 6 or 8 Ibuprofins and have 3 shots of Tequila, and I can get through it and sometimes actually enjoy it for a little while. In the end, I am still so sad because vaginal atrophy literally ruined my life. Now I've gained some weight, and I feel like I am not a real woman anymore. I feel unattractive and now I have trust issues with my husband who says "you didn't just expect me to never have sex again just because you can't, did you? " Yep, that's my man, I can't believe more people in their 50's don't off themselves. Everything you care about is gone, including good sex, slim body, kids have all moved out, I have no friends near me anymore, and now my husband cheats occasionally and I'm supposed to be ok with that because I guess it's my fault. I need help with this issue. Real help before it's too late for me. Any suggestions at all would be welcomed appreciatively. I sound like a baby. With so many of you having way more serious things going on like cancers, endometriosis, and urology issues, I am so sorry I feel ridiculous even bringing this up.

I have had the same problem needing to correct atrophy-related symptoms, and I have none of those. My reasons are purely selfish. I am 57 now, but was maybe 54 when Vaginal Atrophy hit me. I say "hit me" because it happened overnight. My husband and I have always enjoyed a very active sex life, and one night it was great as always, and the next, it felt like he was wearing a condom made of tiny knives slicing me up. All at once, fine one day, and you can never have great sex again the next. I just cried and cried because my husband has turned to younger women a few times now to satisfy his needs because I simply could not do it anymore. It is ruining my marriage. Like someone else said I first talked to my primary who had nothing relevant to say at all and then a nurse practitioner/gyn that is a sex/menopause specialist. My primary ridiculously told me to try lubricants. There does not exist a lubricant that can help this kind of pain unless it has the stuff they use at the dentist in it, then maybe. The specialist told me it was vaginal atrophy, and prescribed estradiol vaginal cream. As I began to use it, it did help a little, but not that much, and a side effect I noticed was my hair began to fall out. Numerous professionals have told me that is not possible, that estrogen helps hair regrow, not the opposite but when I read the entire paper that came with it, in the fine print, hair loss was listed as a possible side effect. So then I had to choose between my hair falling out in patches or a better sex life but still not perfect. So I stopped taking it. Now when we want to be intimate, I take 6 or 8 Ibuprofins and have 3 shots of Tequila, and I can get through it and sometimes actually enjoy it for a little while. In the end, I am still so sad because vaginal atrophy literally ruined my life. Now I've gained some weight, and I feel like I am not a real woman anymore. I feel unattractive and now I have trust issues with my husband who says "you didn't just expect me to never have sex again just because you can't, did you? " Yep, that's my man, I can't believe more people in their 50's don't off themselves. Everything you care about is gone, including good sex, slim body, kids have all moved out, I have no friends near me anymore, and now my husband cheats occasionally and I'm supposed to be ok with that because I guess it's my fault. I need help with this issue. Real help before it's too late for me. Any suggestions at all would be welcomed appreciatively. I sound like a baby. With so many of you having way more serious things going on like cancers, endometriosis, and urology issues, I am so sorry I feel ridiculous even bringing this up.

I take Osphena 60 mg for this. It's helped tremendously. My husband also uses a Replens lubricant. I've also found Replens for myself helpful. I'm sorry you've not found support and help from your spouse. Be careful yiurself if he's having sexual relations outside the marriage. You might want to consider talking to someone about all that's going on for you right now.

I have had the same problem needing to correct atrophy-related symptoms, and I have none of those. My reasons are purely selfish. I am 57 now, but was maybe 54 when Vaginal Atrophy hit me. I say "hit me" because it happened overnight. My husband and I have always enjoyed a very active sex life, and one night it was great as always, and the next, it felt like he was wearing a condom made of tiny knives slicing me up. All at once, fine one day, and you can never have great sex again the next. I just cried and cried because my husband has turned to younger women a few times now to satisfy his needs because I simply could not do it anymore. It is ruining my marriage. Like someone else said I first talked to my primary who had nothing relevant to say at all and then a nurse practitioner/gyn that is a sex/menopause specialist. My primary ridiculously told me to try lubricants. There does not exist a lubricant that can help this kind of pain unless it has the stuff they use at the dentist in it, then maybe. The specialist told me it was vaginal atrophy, and prescribed estradiol vaginal cream. As I began to use it, it did help a little, but not that much, and a side effect I noticed was my hair began to fall out. Numerous professionals have told me that is not possible, that estrogen helps hair regrow, not the opposite but when I read the entire paper that came with it, in the fine print, hair loss was listed as a possible side effect. So then I had to choose between my hair falling out in patches or a better sex life but still not perfect. So I stopped taking it. Now when we want to be intimate, I take 6 or 8 Ibuprofins and have 3 shots of Tequila, and I can get through it and sometimes actually enjoy it for a little while. In the end, I am still so sad because vaginal atrophy literally ruined my life. Now I've gained some weight, and I feel like I am not a real woman anymore. I feel unattractive and now I have trust issues with my husband who says "you didn't just expect me to never have sex again just because you can't, did you? " Yep, that's my man, I can't believe more people in their 50's don't off themselves. Everything you care about is gone, including good sex, slim body, kids have all moved out, I have no friends near me anymore, and now my husband cheats occasionally and I'm supposed to be ok with that because I guess it's my fault. I need help with this issue. Real help before it's too late for me. Any suggestions at all would be welcomed appreciatively. I sound like a baby. With so many of you having way more serious things going on like cancers, endometriosis, and urology issues, I am so sorry I feel ridiculous even bringing this up.

Complete hysterectomy at 44, no cancer thankfully, and had hrt for a couple years until supposedly medical community said the chance of breast cancer became enormous. Of course, stopped hrt.
Atrophy started, and had tons of bladder and urethra issues, urethra dilation became a regular part of my life.

My old urologist retired, fortunately, and my new doctor had specialties in urology and gynecology. Gave me the estrogen tabs, which worked great for years, then I started having problems again. Atrophy and very painful sex.

Moved south, and found a woman urologist who recommended compounding the meds in a non irritating cream base. She asked the compounding pharmacy to give me several samples of different base cream to try with no meds, to see which was comfortable, and they graciously did. The vaginal and urethra issues almost disappeared.

I asked my doctor if she could RX just the base cream to use as a lubricant. It works great and really inexpensive and not messy.

She also rx’d pelvic therapy/dilation which was extremely painful at first, because I was so tight, but that loosened up.

Things are better now, I am 71 and seemingly have some comfort for a while…maybe your doctors could recommend the same type of cream for a lubricant with no meds?

Good luck to all!