Treatment resistant depression help.

Ive been diagnosed with depression, anxiety, ptsd for over 20 years. I grew up with a lot of trauma and neglect. Ive never done ECT or the ketamine sprays, Im so afraid of them. Ive done a wide array of medications and therapy.
Im so lost right now, I can't seem to thrive, I am disabled because of it.
My mom is having cognitive decline so it's a lot of stress. We have a rocky relationship but she's still my mom.
We are not fighting as much which I like but I am so sad for her and feel helpless. I worry because my dad and brother dont.
So I feel stuck myself.

Not sure what to do when throwing meds at it isn't helping and therapy has me going nowhere right now.

There are very limited resources, no support groups, just AA. Im not sure how to find community, relearn to socialize and find a life for me again.

Should I try something else? Im at a loss

Ive been diagnosed with depression, anxiety, ptsd for over 20 years. I grew up with a lot of trauma and neglect. Ive never done ECT or the ketamine sprays, Im so afraid of them. Ive done a wide array of medications and therapy.
Im so lost right now, I can't seem to thrive, I am disabled because of it.
My mom is having cognitive decline so it's a lot of stress. We have a rocky relationship but she's still my mom.
We are not fighting as much which I like but I am so sad for her and feel helpless. I worry because my dad and brother dont.
So I feel stuck myself.

Not sure what to do when throwing meds at it isn't helping and therapy has me going nowhere right now.

There are very limited resources, no support groups, just AA. Im not sure how to find community, relearn to socialize and find a life for me again.

Should I try something else? Im at a loss

The reason, some believe, the AA helps people is because it provides a depth of Human connection, where they are able to open up to complete strangers but each willing to share their deepest, most guarded, embarrassing flaws.

The former Surgeon General, Vivek Murthy, believed that lack of human connection in our modern world is behind a number of health issues such as depression, dementia, and early death.
There is also a study that has used the nurses in USA to understand many health problems. They found that while nurses died 66% more often when they lacked social integration, their breast cancer death rate was twice as much than those with close connections. Most surprising though was that those who had many close friends, they were even far better in terms of survival than even those who had family connections but no friends.

Who knew what costs us nothing is also the most potent source of our health.

No wonder it's absence, loneliness, is as bad as smoking 15 cigarettes a day.

Maybe this why Aristotle has said, "Life without a friend is not worth living."
https://ascopubs.org/doi/abs/10.1200/jco.2005.04.2846

What about ETC?

I would say always try something else. You never know if the next thing will be the one that pulls you out of your depression. Posting here is a good start. If therapy isn’t helping, maybe you need a different therapist. I started taking Vraylar about 6 months ago and it helped my 20 year long treatment resistant depression tremendously. It’s actually for schizophrenia (which I don’t have) but is being prescribed for depression with a lot of success.
I’m not a doctor or any type of medical professional, just a person with a history of bipolar depression and a daughter with a declining mother.
I feel your pain and frustration and hope that you can find the little bit of light I’m trying to send you.

Thanks for your reply. Does your insurance cover Vraylar since you dont have schizophrenia?
Im sorry about your mother. I think a major part of my depression right now are the changes in my mom. Im grieving, worried and sometimes have long crying spells. I am deteriorating.

Ive been diagnosed with depression, anxiety, ptsd for over 20 years. I grew up with a lot of trauma and neglect. Ive never done ECT or the ketamine sprays, Im so afraid of them. Ive done a wide array of medications and therapy.
Im so lost right now, I can't seem to thrive, I am disabled because of it.
My mom is having cognitive decline so it's a lot of stress. We have a rocky relationship but she's still my mom.
We are not fighting as much which I like but I am so sad for her and feel helpless. I worry because my dad and brother dont.
So I feel stuck myself.

Not sure what to do when throwing meds at it isn't helping and therapy has me going nowhere right now.

There are very limited resources, no support groups, just AA. Im not sure how to find community, relearn to socialize and find a life for me again.

Should I try something else? Im at a loss

Im in therapy. Just a lot of problems and burnout. I have trouble functioning a lot.

Ive been diagnosed with depression, anxiety, ptsd for over 20 years. I grew up with a lot of trauma and neglect. Ive never done ECT or the ketamine sprays, Im so afraid of them. Ive done a wide array of medications and therapy.
Im so lost right now, I can't seem to thrive, I am disabled because of it.
My mom is having cognitive decline so it's a lot of stress. We have a rocky relationship but she's still my mom.
We are not fighting as much which I like but I am so sad for her and feel helpless. I worry because my dad and brother dont.
So I feel stuck myself.

Not sure what to do when throwing meds at it isn't helping and therapy has me going nowhere right now.

There are very limited resources, no support groups, just AA. Im not sure how to find community, relearn to socialize and find a life for me again.

Should I try something else? Im at a loss

Yes. My insurance (CDPHP) covers Vraylar.
I’m very worried about you. I hope that you can find something or someone to help you stop this downward spiral.
I’m sorry about your Mom too.
I sometimes hate to admit it, but the truth is that what helped me most with my mother was finding an excellent memory care facility for her. I had to admit to myself that under my and my sister’s care, she was getting worse. She now has professional help 24/7 and the type of care that we could never give her.
I sometimes still feel guilty about not being able to care for her but taking that step was the best decision I ever made. And trust me, she absolutely did not want to go. Lots of crying and screaming and threats of no longer speaking to me. But you know what? She’s happier now. Truly. Calmer, more social and gaining a little weight. Her memory continues to deteriorate but not as fast as it was.
I don’t know where you live but I’m in Upstate New York and it’s starting to get dark a lot earlier here. I think this adversely affects my mood as I too have been feeling more depressed lately. My solution is to make more art and to participate more at my volunteer job.
Please hang on. It always somehow, some way, gets better.