To move near family or stay put
we have been living in a retirement community for 21 years, and our children are encouraging us to move back to our previous community and be near them. We have long-term care insurance which could cover us in either place should we have the need?
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Love your advice. I took care of my mother, and it affected my health for quite a long time afterwards.
I know the children well, but it gets old and tiring, and I don’t want to have them go through that. Even though we wouldn’t be in their home, it is too much and too hard for us to move.
I have a different problem- 2 adult children and their families states away from me and each other, both advocating for me to move near them. Here I live in a starter home we never left- one floor, I have my brother and sister-in-law nearby. We’re close and help each other (mid 70’s), my health is good.
I know choosing one to move near to will cause a lot of hurt feelings and possibly upset between the two, anybody else dealing with sibling rivalry still? Guess I should be happy I’m popular 🤣
Two choices: decline to move for the sake of comfort, ability, and continuity, or choose one of the two and be prepared to 'splain yourself to the one refused. How the spurned child feels is not your problem...it's theirs. You're a grownup with faculties and experience in living, and your decision must be unquestioned. Leave the rivalry where it belongs...between them.
I turned 75 two weeks ago, and I am also in the process of going through all of my things, getting ready to move back to Minnesota where I have a sister, 3 brothers and several good friends. Going through my stuff sometimes it almost seems like living my life in reverse. I know when I helped my Dad consolidate and clear our our family home how long the process can take, and saying goodbye to all those things. But it was also a wonderful way to relive the memories.
I have already given all my plants and plant stuff away. Today my bff is coming over and I can give her some shelves she will use to set up her sewing room. I have always been of the mindset that if I bring in something home then I must give up something. That being said, it is so darned easy to accumulate "stuff". One thing that helps is to say to myself, 'if there was a fire, what would I grab before getting out?' It helps to figure out what is most important.
I too am going thru photos and old letters. This takes the longest time. Most of the photos were taken by myself so I have hard copies, copies on CD and copies on my computer via/phone. The time consuming part is going through and remembering and then dealing with any emotions that come up, before I pass the hard copies on to my nieces, nephews, and other family members. It can feel like I am losing something, but again, I still have most on CDs. I like your idea of putting the photos on a rotating wall frame.
I will do the same process with jewelry. I think this will be a bit easier especially since I wear very little nowadays, and keep them mostly for sentimental value; although, I am surprised how possessive I am of my "jewels".
Good Luck in your downsizing process.
Best of luck…. I’m glad you’re getting to remember things before you say goodbye. Vicious.
Don’t know where vicious came from, but I don’t want to include that.
Gotta love auto correct!