Stage 4 inoperative squamous NSCLC, now on Opdivo last line Tx

Hi everyone, I received a private message from @goldenretriever that she wanted to share with all of you. This is her message:

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
FROM @goldenretriever

It is with a heavy heart that I write this update regarding my amazing husband, Jim. His last appointment with his oncologist, we were given the news that there was nothing more to do for Jim and it was suggested to place our focus on quality of life. He was given approximately 6 months to live. It seemed unreal. It was explained, Jim was to weak to participate in a trial. It was suggested we contact Hospice to help with quality of life. We did that weekend, and for the next four weeks , Jim went down hill each week. For three days he lost much of his memory, slept all day and ate very little, only drank Boost. He bounced back for four days and then went back into the prior state. He did this twice, which his oncologist said he had never seen happen. He never recovered after the second time. I took care of Jim in our home with the 24 hour help of our 2 sons. I could not have done it with out their help. Jim required meds every hour around the clock. Three day later Jim passes with all his family at his side. The most saddest moment in my entire life. I know he is resting in peace now and could not wish him back to suffer again, but I miss him beyond what words can express. I sleep on his side of the bed so I won't have to look over and see that he is not there. This helps some.

I know our Lord and Savior will carry me, and our family through this chapter in our lives. I would highly suggest each family who is going through cancer treatment, get their old pictures out and go through them. We had to do this for Jim's service. The family had such an amazing time doing this, recalling trips taken in the long ago past. I wish we would have done this while Jim was still with us, but he never felt good enough to do it. So do it before your loved one gets to worn out.

So that's the end of our journey, dealing with cancer in our family. We now will have to adjust to the new normal.
I wish everyone, who continues to deal with this disease, the courage to continue on, each day with hope and encouragement from others close to you and from this amazing site.

Blessing to all, Mary Lou

Hi everyone, I received a private message from @goldenretriever that she wanted to share with all of you. This is her message:

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
FROM @goldenretriever

It is with a heavy heart that I write this update regarding my amazing husband, Jim. His last appointment with his oncologist, we were given the news that there was nothing more to do for Jim and it was suggested to place our focus on quality of life. He was given approximately 6 months to live. It seemed unreal. It was explained, Jim was to weak to participate in a trial. It was suggested we contact Hospice to help with quality of life. We did that weekend, and for the next four weeks , Jim went down hill each week. For three days he lost much of his memory, slept all day and ate very little, only drank Boost. He bounced back for four days and then went back into the prior state. He did this twice, which his oncologist said he had never seen happen. He never recovered after the second time. I took care of Jim in our home with the 24 hour help of our 2 sons. I could not have done it with out their help. Jim required meds every hour around the clock. Three day later Jim passes with all his family at his side. The most saddest moment in my entire life. I know he is resting in peace now and could not wish him back to suffer again, but I miss him beyond what words can express. I sleep on his side of the bed so I won't have to look over and see that he is not there. This helps some.

I know our Lord and Savior will carry me, and our family through this chapter in our lives. I would highly suggest each family who is going through cancer treatment, get their old pictures out and go through them. We had to do this for Jim's service. The family had such an amazing time doing this, recalling trips taken in the long ago past. I wish we would have done this while Jim was still with us, but he never felt good enough to do it. So do it before your loved one gets to worn out.

So that's the end of our journey, dealing with cancer in our family. We now will have to adjust to the new normal.
I wish everyone, who continues to deal with this disease, the courage to continue on, each day with hope and encouragement from others close to you and from this amazing site.

Blessing to all, Mary Lou

Oh poor goldenretriever. My heart is with her and her family. Her husband had a loving and dedicated family. Is there a grief group?

Hi everyone, I received a private message from @goldenretriever that she wanted to share with all of you. This is her message:

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
FROM @goldenretriever

It is with a heavy heart that I write this update regarding my amazing husband, Jim. His last appointment with his oncologist, we were given the news that there was nothing more to do for Jim and it was suggested to place our focus on quality of life. He was given approximately 6 months to live. It seemed unreal. It was explained, Jim was to weak to participate in a trial. It was suggested we contact Hospice to help with quality of life. We did that weekend, and for the next four weeks , Jim went down hill each week. For three days he lost much of his memory, slept all day and ate very little, only drank Boost. He bounced back for four days and then went back into the prior state. He did this twice, which his oncologist said he had never seen happen. He never recovered after the second time. I took care of Jim in our home with the 24 hour help of our 2 sons. I could not have done it with out their help. Jim required meds every hour around the clock. Three day later Jim passes with all his family at his side. The most saddest moment in my entire life. I know he is resting in peace now and could not wish him back to suffer again, but I miss him beyond what words can express. I sleep on his side of the bed so I won't have to look over and see that he is not there. This helps some.

I know our Lord and Savior will carry me, and our family through this chapter in our lives. I would highly suggest each family who is going through cancer treatment, get their old pictures out and go through them. We had to do this for Jim's service. The family had such an amazing time doing this, recalling trips taken in the long ago past. I wish we would have done this while Jim was still with us, but he never felt good enough to do it. So do it before your loved one gets to worn out.

So that's the end of our journey, dealing with cancer in our family. We now will have to adjust to the new normal.
I wish everyone, who continues to deal with this disease, the courage to continue on, each day with hope and encouragement from others close to you and from this amazing site.

Blessing to all, Mary Lou

Good recommendation, @merpreb. Currently we have several discussions on Connect related to loss and grief:
- The Journey of Grieving https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/the-journey-of-grieving/
- Loss and Grief: How are you doing? https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/loss-and-grief-how-are-you-doing/
- the grieving process https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/the-grieving-process/
- Loss and Grief in Caregiving https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/loss-and-grief-in-caregiving/

A new group dedicated to Loss and Grief will be opened next month.

@colleenyoung- Did a new group ever open up for Loss and Grief as stated above?