Pain and Loss of Self Worth

I would love to help students and those newly entering the job market! There is a small college nearby and I'll contact them about volunteering opportunities.
I so appreciate your giving thought to my situation, Scott! Many thanks for responding!

I can't tell you how much your response and that of others has helped me see that there are many approaches to dealing with this new reality.
I guess we all need to remind ourselves that we have value even with diminished physical capacity.
Thank you for your kind response and wishing you the best~

I totally understand. I have horrible pain from a neck injury and surgery that didn't help, it made it worse. I have a plate and 4 screws in my neck.I also have chronic pancreatitis and get a block every 3 months and biopsies for barrett's esophagus. My esophagus is really tight and they have to use dialaters just to do the egd and ultrasound for the injections. I live on a feeding tube into my small intestine and a pump feeds me. I have gastroparesis with chronic nausea. I also now have 2 types of neuropathy. My blood pressure tank's when I stand up and I Pass out. The majority started when I was 49. I feel your pain. I am disabled because I have to be on the feeding pump for 16-18 hours a day. I can't drive with the blood pressure issues from my one neuropathy and my failed neck surgery has me in chronic pain. I also can't be up for more than 10 minutes without having to sit down. I wish someone had answers and something that can help me. My life is so stagnant and I was a very active person and loved my job. I feel like my doctors have just given up on me. I can't get answers or relief and I spent most of my days sitting on my bed. I hope someone out there can steer us both into the right direction 🙏 God Bless you 🙏

Change in overall health in a negative direction is never a welcomed event in our life. I too have and do still struggle with unwelcomed changes to physical abilities. When I was in.a very low place in this process I came across a book. It changed the way I looked at my afflictions and predicament in a positive manner. The title is, "90 Minutes in Heaven" by Don Piper. It's quick read and I promise it will help you greatly towards learning that what once was, will not be the same again. And, it really does not need to be the same for you to feel good about yourself again, I promise!

Omg! I literally just started a discussion in depression and anxiety, almost to the T of what you posted. I know exactly how you feel. It's terrible. It's caused me to completely be by myself w very little outside contact, I'm struggling with what to do now, since I add zero value, have nothing much to offer and it's 110% changed me as a person.

I understand where you are coming from. Pain is not fun and does do a number on your mind I have rheumatoid arthritis, 14 weeks post op of major neck fusion, and back surgery, and awaiting tests to see if I have fibromyalgia. I am a not so active 75 yr old. It There is always reading about what you like to do, or phone a friend.

Oh yes. 40 years as an academic, 15 as a dean of science. Arachnoiditis and nueropathy following failed back surgery 4 years ago have slowed me down to a crawl and my self esteem has suffered greatly. How I miss my running, biking, hiking, travel. Waaay too much time for rumination. So sorry. I am a fellow traveler, my friend….

I’m 71 and have neuropathy, chronic pain syndrome and associated crap that comes with it. I’m sorry to hear you’re feeling less worth because you can’t do for others or maybe that choir you can’t do for yourself. Is this a healthy way to view yourself? NO! Let’s try flipping the switch on what you’re trying to do to make you feel worthwhile. I do the cooking and shopping for my wife and I but as my body continues to fall apart I adapt. I no longer shop myself but by computer for delivery. I cook but do it in small steps along the day so I’m not standing over a counter prepping for 15-30 minutes at a time. Ouch!
You spent 40 years as an executive providing some benefit that allowed you to earn money. Obviously you’re an educated women that I presume can still use a PC, which should enable you to either do positive things for yourself or others if your physicality permits. My wife over Covid lockdown did ESL tutoring for Nationality Services Center via zoom. You can read books for the blind or other remote services that you might be able to contribute to for people who cannot. You can enjoy yourself by reading books, newspapers, do puzzles, communicate with others via Mayo Forum, etc. as a way of remaining relevant as you have been in the past.
For me since pain is my steady companion I do everything everyday that I can to keep it at bay. In other words I come first which for me was difficult to put in motion having been a nurse for 40 years and used to taking care of others. You only have one life so why not enjoy the free time you have for yourself. I hope I did not carry on too long and bore you.

What a great response! Thanks, because I was thinking of what to suggest, but you about covered it all.
Sue

In no way did you bore me!! In fact, you inspired me to continually search for ways to remain active while accepting the limitations of the pain.
You and so many others have been so helpful with their responses.
You're right..........it's time for me to "flip the switch"!
Thank you so much for taking the time to respond.