Remaining independent: Tips & tricks for creating good habits

Posted by fiesty76 @fiesty76, Jan 8, 2020

Concerned because a neighbor has called three times in recent months to tell me my garage door had been standing open for several hours and was checking to see if I was ok. While very grateful for the calls and after the 1st call immediately posted a sign on my utility door as a reminder to “close door”, two more calls followed that 1st one.

I’ve lived alone in my home for decades. I’m 76 and still maintain my home and do my own yard work. While I’ve laughed for years that I have always been a bit scatter brained, I am also fiercely independent and not yet ready to relocate out of state near my daughter and into a sr living establishment.

I’m looking into installing a locking system for my automatic garage door but if I continue to fail to press whatever buttons required to close or engage the system, I will not be able to live alone in this house. Any suggestions or tips on how I can “train” myself to be Sure that garage is firmly down?

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@dorisjeanne

I am 85, will be 86 in about 3 weeks. I live alone with a daughter and son-in-law about 15 miles away; very rural part of Ozarks. It's beautiful here and I've been in my home for 24 years now. Lost my husband of 60 years about 9 years ago. Lately my memory is getting worse and I wear a contact around my neck in case " I fall and can't get up"!
Getting so I get confused handling finances; recently hired a couple to do my windows, also had some guys remove old carpets and install vinyl tile in 2 bedrooms. I began to get confused with writing checks, etc.! Never happened before!!! My daughter was on vacation in Colorado. I should have waited, right?

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I am happy you have a daughter to help you. It isn't always old age – I took over my Mom & Dad's checkbook balancing at 14, and doing their taxes at 24. I was just better with numbers & forms.

But nobody could fix things like my Dad, or bake like Mom. Her problem as she got older was forgetting steps when baking – she solved that by doing it with granddaughters. Now the 4 who worked with her often are great bakers!
I'm much younger than you, but I hire my windows done too – it requires climbing ladders, not a good idea for me. It is wonderful to figure out how to get things done as we get older.
Sue

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I too am getting a 'bit more than forgetful" it is not just misplacing my reading glasses, or forgetting what day of the week it is so look on calendar… it's something more odd and more upsetting…. I did have a "small stroke" last year and now 79 am wondering …. I think an mri last year mentioned 'white matter.' My one daughter said to me the other day ; Mum I couldn't find my phone and it was in my hand… to make me feel better but I am quite worried about my future as my mother had dementia. Is this something one should mention to family dr. or in my case, nurse practitioner?

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@dorisjeanne

I am 85, will be 86 in about 3 weeks. I live alone with a daughter and son-in-law about 15 miles away; very rural part of Ozarks. It's beautiful here and I've been in my home for 24 years now. Lost my husband of 60 years about 9 years ago. Lately my memory is getting worse and I wear a contact around my neck in case " I fall and can't get up"!
Getting so I get confused handling finances; recently hired a couple to do my windows, also had some guys remove old carpets and install vinyl tile in 2 bedrooms. I began to get confused with writing checks, etc.! Never happened before!!! My daughter was on vacation in Colorado. I should have waited, right?

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Sometimes financial things can get confused ….Maybe it might have been better to line up the work for when she was around….less stressful too having someone else around…I always ask for a written bill and description of work done…and try to pay by chk. And write down the chk number and date on my copy of the bill…signed and dated..Maybe someone you trust like from your church or your bank could help. For work around the house I ask my son or a knowledgeable friend to vet what is going to be done and whether the price quoted is reasonable and only pay once the work is completed. If the worker complains about this I plead “old age” and ask them to come back later when my son is around and offer them a coffee. The main thing is not to be rushed or pressured into anything. I hope this is helpful. Every situation is different. Take care and be well

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It was interesting reading. Right now I just turned 88! I can hardly imagine it. So far with the help of a monthly cleaning person I am managing. I am also recovering from a complete hip replacement. I can drive. I can cook. I can do my laundry. I can take care of my financial affairs. So I am going to stay independent as long as I can.

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@thisismarilynb

It was interesting reading. Right now I just turned 88! I can hardly imagine it. So far with the help of a monthly cleaning person I am managing. I am also recovering from a complete hip replacement. I can drive. I can cook. I can do my laundry. I can take care of my financial affairs. So I am going to stay independent as long as I can.

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You're an inspiration; I turn 80 in March and your spunk gives me hope! I plan to stay independent as long as I can. My nephew lives downstairs so that's a help when he's her. His job takes him out of town a lot. I love this age. Time to do all the things I enjoy like gentle yoga, walking, reading, a couple water classes a week when covid level is not high in the area. So I am grateful that I have the health and energy to be as active as I choose to. I do have someone come once a month to clean my house. Been doing it for several years already.

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@dornow

You're an inspiration; I turn 80 in March and your spunk gives me hope! I plan to stay independent as long as I can. My nephew lives downstairs so that's a help when he's her. His job takes him out of town a lot. I love this age. Time to do all the things I enjoy like gentle yoga, walking, reading, a couple water classes a week when covid level is not high in the area. So I am grateful that I have the health and energy to be as active as I choose to. I do have someone come once a month to clean my house. Been doing it for several years already.

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Thank you. When I read about the health problems of so many who are younger than I am, I am thankful that I listened to the advice of medical professionals when I was younger. I made time for myself. Even though I was married with children, had a full time job, every day after work I changed into my sweats and drove to the track at Cal Tech. I did 3-4 miles of race walking. I did this for at least 40 years until my hip started acting up. I believe I am now reaping the rewards of my taking time for myself. So the kids had their dinner a little later. I also learned the benefits of planning ahead and using the slow cooker a lot. I believe this is now what is keeping me going at such an old age. And I do not feel my age at all. When I think about it I am surprised.

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@fromthehill

Sometimes financial things can get confused ….Maybe it might have been better to line up the work for when she was around….less stressful too having someone else around…I always ask for a written bill and description of work done…and try to pay by chk. And write down the chk number and date on my copy of the bill…signed and dated..Maybe someone you trust like from your church or your bank could help. For work around the house I ask my son or a knowledgeable friend to vet what is going to be done and whether the price quoted is reasonable and only pay once the work is completed. If the worker complains about this I plead “old age” and ask them to come back later when my son is around and offer them a coffee. The main thing is not to be rushed or pressured into anything. I hope this is helpful. Every situation is different. Take care and be well

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Thank you for your reply! I also get written plans and prices and pay by check. I usually depend on my daughter & hubby to help; however this time they left on a trip to CO and I was contacted by the repair guy previously. If I'd had the chance, I would have postponed the work. However his work was excellent and quite reasonable, so that went well. It is ME who got so confused!! I have never had this experience before; just "old age" I guess . I plan to talk to my Dr. when I see him, next week. Thanks again!!

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@thisismarilynb

Thank you. When I read about the health problems of so many who are younger than I am, I am thankful that I listened to the advice of medical professionals when I was younger. I made time for myself. Even though I was married with children, had a full time job, every day after work I changed into my sweats and drove to the track at Cal Tech. I did 3-4 miles of race walking. I did this for at least 40 years until my hip started acting up. I believe I am now reaping the rewards of my taking time for myself. So the kids had their dinner a little later. I also learned the benefits of planning ahead and using the slow cooker a lot. I believe this is now what is keeping me going at such an old age. And I do not feel my age at all. When I think about it I am surprised.

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Healthwise, I feel blessed. My goal has been to avoid perscriptions; I have strange side effects from most. Thankful for the Covid vaccine; no complications from that. I am a retired teacher and for my last 15 years, I lived about a mile from the school. Most days I walked there and back. Firm believer in staying active/fit and eating healthy. Your're right. Healthy lifestyle makes for healthy aging.

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Maybe this has been suggested, I’m 76 also, but I find the alarm settings on my iPhone is a life saver so I don’t forget to do something. You can set it for a certain time everyday, so I would set it maybe around 5 or 6 at night to alert you to check your garage door. Good luck!

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I am 87 I live alone, do everything on my own including banking and driving.. I am told I should not drive by family members but I don’t agree with them. What do others think.

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