Is he unable to brush his own teeth now? My husband only brushes his at night (unless he's going to the doctor or dentist), but I have to remind him/nag him every night. He was always bad about only brushing once a day, so the schedule is still the same. It's just that he no longer thinks of it on his own. And forget flossing—unless something is stuck in there, he never did that, yet he seldom had any dental issues.
He'll be 89 this summer, so I've decided not to worry too much about it. His teeth will probably last as long as he does, so I'll just keep reminding/nagging him to brush before bed.
Going through the same thing with my husband. At the onset of his dementia the dentist would suggest water picks and electric tooth brushes to help but needless to say he couldn’t follow basic instructions of brushing till the device stopped. Now we just use a regular tooth brush. My husband is 95 & still has his own teeth so I try not to get too upset when things don’t go exactly the way it should.
I can completely relate to what you’re all experiencing my dad went through a similar phase a couple of years ago, and it really tested our patience and creativity. For us, the biggest challenge was getting him to accept help without feeling like his independence was being taken away. One small change that made a surprising difference was turning oral hygiene into part of a routine we did together like after dinner when we'd both “get ready for the night.” It felt less like nagging and more like a shared habit.
For those dealing with more resistance or memory-related issues, it might help to simplify the setup like using a visible toothbrush holder, electric toothbrushes with timers, or even music during brushing to make the process feel less clinical and more engaging.
That said, if you’re worried about whether they’re actually cleaning well enough, it may be worth speaking to a dental professional who’s experienced in elderly care. I found a helpful resource at Kellyville Dentist, when looking for advice on how to adapt oral hygiene routines for older adults. They have useful insights and a caring approach, which might ease the stress a bit.
Hang in there, it's not easy, but even small wins in consistency can make a real difference over time.
Is he unable to brush his own teeth now? My husband only brushes his at night (unless he's going to the doctor or dentist), but I have to remind him/nag him every night. He was always bad about only brushing once a day, so the schedule is still the same. It's just that he no longer thinks of it on his own. And forget flossing—unless something is stuck in there, he never did that, yet he seldom had any dental issues.
He'll be 89 this summer, so I've decided not to worry too much about it. His teeth will probably last as long as he does, so I'll just keep reminding/nagging him to brush before bed.
My wife doesn't brush like she used to. I have had some success with dental rinses. I know the dentists say that's not good enough. Our dentist did say I could bring her in more often just for a clean, more than twice a year.
My husband can still brush his own teeth and he uses the tool to get rid of tartar. He balks at flossing once in a while. I did read about an effective rinse that stops the development of tartar. Is it okay to name the product here?
Our problem is the dentist. We waited for her in the treatment room for 20 minutes. My husband was livid. As his Alzheimer progresses, he's more and more focused on time.
Every minute he asked me where she was, how long did we have to wait and could we leave. I managed to talk him down. It was tiring and I was annoyed with her too, ready to leave when she breezed in.
He tolerated her cleaning his teeth with the pick for five minutes.
I told her the long wait didn't help, and she said my husband's the same whether shge keeps us waiting or not.
She told me how she wanted him to acclimate to the room and get comfortable which is why she kept us waiting so long. What??? Who gets comfortable in a dentist's chair, waiting for treatment?
She basically told me she's traumatized by my husband, that he's said inappropriate things to her.
I'm always there - he's abrupt sometimes and rude, but has never sworn at her.
He's over 80, and doesn't do well with women dentists. Maybe his deep-seated chauvinism is coming out since he's lost his filter.
I can ask to switch to our dentist's husband, who she's in practice with, but I fear the waiting time will be the same with him. (She once kept me waiting for an hour).
I can try and switch to a new practice.
Yesterday I got some leads on a good practice at our Alzheimer's Association Caregiver's Support Group.
The coordinator identified the need for training medical/dental professionals.
What experiences have you had with dentists and their sensitivity to patients with dementia, or lack of it?
Thanks!
His behavior and words have nothing to do with his disease. He’s simply lost his filter due to it and no one deserves to be verbally assaulted. I agree with her. I honestly would have told my father to shut it and ushered him out. I would have him doing extensive measures at home in the meantime and find another dentist at another location.
Being a caregiver is exhausting and we have many responsibilities. I’m sorry you have to go through this but do know, you got this.
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Going through the same thing with my husband. At the onset of his dementia the dentist would suggest water picks and electric tooth brushes to help but needless to say he couldn’t follow basic instructions of brushing till the device stopped. Now we just use a regular tooth brush. My husband is 95 & still has his own teeth so I try not to get too upset when things don’t go exactly the way it should.
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2 ReactionsI can completely relate to what you’re all experiencing my dad went through a similar phase a couple of years ago, and it really tested our patience and creativity. For us, the biggest challenge was getting him to accept help without feeling like his independence was being taken away. One small change that made a surprising difference was turning oral hygiene into part of a routine we did together like after dinner when we'd both “get ready for the night.” It felt less like nagging and more like a shared habit.
For those dealing with more resistance or memory-related issues, it might help to simplify the setup like using a visible toothbrush holder, electric toothbrushes with timers, or even music during brushing to make the process feel less clinical and more engaging.
That said, if you’re worried about whether they’re actually cleaning well enough, it may be worth speaking to a dental professional who’s experienced in elderly care. I found a helpful resource at Kellyville Dentist, when looking for advice on how to adapt oral hygiene routines for older adults. They have useful insights and a caring approach, which might ease the stress a bit.
Hang in there, it's not easy, but even small wins in consistency can make a real difference over time.
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2 ReactionsMy wife doesn't brush like she used to. I have had some success with dental rinses. I know the dentists say that's not good enough. Our dentist did say I could bring her in more often just for a clean, more than twice a year.
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3 Reactionsan angel!
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1 ReactionHis behavior and words have nothing to do with his disease. He’s simply lost his filter due to it and no one deserves to be verbally assaulted. I agree with her. I honestly would have told my father to shut it and ushered him out. I would have him doing extensive measures at home in the meantime and find another dentist at another location.
Being a caregiver is exhausting and we have many responsibilities. I’m sorry you have to go through this but do know, you got this.
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