1. < Caregivers: Dementia
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I understand it's the disease, but how can this be...

Posted by cyds @cyds, 3 hours ago

How can it be that my DH thinks he is getting better... and I do understand that this is a "normal" progression of the disease. I am finding this the most perplexing so far in this journey. It's unwise to argue the point, but GAWD I want to smack him!

We received a quote to do a facelift on the front of our house - it's falling apart and HAS to get done. He absolutely thinks that because he ran a paint crew (whatever that means) on a ship in Vietnam 50+ years ago, he can do this very difficult structural work. I love the proposal and we have the money, but I think I'm going to have to wait until it's completely my decision. I'll never get agreement from him. I'm going to shred the proposal and let this fade to the background, which is my MO now for so many things now.

I'm just venting because I'm frustrated and disappointed, and for the first time in a couple of years, a little scared. This experience is the first overt progression of the disease since the very beginning. I also noticed that he is having a little trouble reading out loud. He often reads things like he is still announcing on the radio, which can be fun. I shared a while back about our really scary experiences in Paris, but he was back to normal soon after we returned home, so that is in the rearview mirror... I thought. We had been coasting at the same stage for so long I was starting to think that this was it until he dies, hopefully years from now.

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Caregivers: Dementia Support Group.

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blisst | @blisst | 3 hours ago

I logged in today and am shocked by your post as this is exactly my experience today with my husband. Back story, he was due to have major surgery yesterday (that had me worried as he just had major surgery two months ago). In the end it was cancelled and the relief I felt was immense. He has decided to not go ahead with a new surgery date (the doctor was okay with that as he had suggested that we could wait). This morning my husband is saying he is getting better. He even says his vision has improved along with his thinking. It all seems strange and a little bit scary as he never mentioned his vision was poor.

Is this just a stage? I don’t know I just can relate to what you are saying. I must admit that I too am a little scared. Maybe some of the wonderful mentors can help?

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blisst | @blisst | 25 minutes ago
In reply to @blisst "I logged in today and am shocked by your post as this is exactly my experience..." + (show)
Profile picture for blisst @blisst

I logged in today and am shocked by your post as this is exactly my experience today with my husband. Back story, he was due to have major surgery yesterday (that had me worried as he just had major surgery two months ago). In the end it was cancelled and the relief I felt was immense. He has decided to not go ahead with a new surgery date (the doctor was okay with that as he had suggested that we could wait). This morning my husband is saying he is getting better. He even says his vision has improved along with his thinking. It all seems strange and a little bit scary as he never mentioned his vision was poor.

Is this just a stage? I don’t know I just can relate to what you are saying. I must admit that I too am a little scared. Maybe some of the wonderful mentors can help?

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@blisst

When I say he feels he is getting better I mean his Dementia, not the reason for his surgery.

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cyds | @cyds | 16 minutes ago
In reply to @blisst "I logged in today and am shocked by your post as this is exactly my experience..." + (show)
Profile picture for blisst @blisst

I logged in today and am shocked by your post as this is exactly my experience today with my husband. Back story, he was due to have major surgery yesterday (that had me worried as he just had major surgery two months ago). In the end it was cancelled and the relief I felt was immense. He has decided to not go ahead with a new surgery date (the doctor was okay with that as he had suggested that we could wait). This morning my husband is saying he is getting better. He even says his vision has improved along with his thinking. It all seems strange and a little bit scary as he never mentioned his vision was poor.

Is this just a stage? I don’t know I just can relate to what you are saying. I must admit that I too am a little scared. Maybe some of the wonderful mentors can help?

Jump to this post

@blisst I googled it and yes in the middle stages it’s very common. So is the diminishing ability to read. Hang in there! 🤗

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