How about a laugh, (hopefully)

Posted by Leonard @jakedduck1, Dec 31, 2018

I believe laughter is the best medicine. Laughter has actually been scientifically proven to help people with depression issues.
Let’s give it a try so we can all get happy and feel better. Many Epilepsy forums I’ve been on had joke sections. I was probably the biggest joke of all since I didn’t get a lot of the jokes. They said the jokes couldn’t be above 4th grade level for me to understand them so my jokes may be rather simplistic but let’s give it a try.
Have a lovely day everyone,
Jake

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@johnbishop
Loved the act.
I enjoyed President and Mrs Raegan laughing so hard even more.
Thanks for the nostalgia.

FL Mary

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@imallears

@johnbishop
Loved the act.
I enjoyed President and Mrs Raegan laughing so hard even more.
Thanks for the nostalgia.

FL Mary

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I agree 🙂 That was great fun!! Got me primed to go shovel snow!! MN, A,,

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O, that was fun! I hadn't been on here for awhile and so glad I didn't miss this!! Thanks!!!!

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Prince Charles takes Camilla out for a ride on his combine harvester one day. Camilla had been bored so he thought this would entertain her.

Up and down the fields they rumbled until there was a slight bump and a squishy, slicey sort of noise from beneath them. Camilla looked behind her and, to her utter horror, she saw that they had just run over four of the Queen’s Corgis. The combine harvester had sliced up the poor creatures and strewn their body parts all over the field.

Prince Charles panicked. There was enough trouble in the household already and he didn’t want what happened with Prince Andrew and Megan to happen to them too.

Prince Charles says to Camilla, “Hurry. Help me pick up all the bits. Stuff them randomly in the bushes and such. We can say foxes got them.”.

When they had set about collecting all the body parts, Prince Charles notices something shiny in a nearby bush. It is a Magic Lantern.

He gives the Magic Lantern a rub and, lo, out pops a Genie.

“It’s my day off,”, says the Genie, “but seeing as it is you, Prince Charles, I will grant you just ONE wish”.

“Oh, thank the stars!” exclaims Prince Charles, “I wish you to repair the Corgis and restore them to life.”

The Genie, looking concerned, says to Charles “Sadly, bringing your poor Corgis back into a fit state and reviving them is beyond my power. I regret that there are some things that even the most powerful of genies cannot do. ”.

So Charles resigns himself to losing the Queen’s Corgis, but then he remembers that he still has that one wish.

“Alright then,” say Prince Charles, “If you can’t revived the Corgis, then I wish you to make Camilla beautiful and desirable to all men!”

The Genie says “Hmm. About those Corgis…”

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Its just a joke ladies, don’t get your tails in a knot.

A Doctor was addressing a large audience. "The material we put into our stomachs is enough to have killed most of us sitting here, years ago.

Red meat is awful. Soft drinks corrode your stomach lining. Chinese food is loaded with MSG. High fat diets can be disastrous, and none of us realizes the long-term harm caused by the germs in our drinking water. But there is one thing that is the most dangerous of all and we all have, or will, eat it. Can anyone here tell me what food it is that causes the most grief and suffering for years after eating it?"

After several seconds of quiet, a 75-year-old man in the front row raised his hand, and softly said, "Wedding Cake."

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@jakedduck1

Prince Charles takes Camilla out for a ride on his combine harvester one day. Camilla had been bored so he thought this would entertain her.

Up and down the fields they rumbled until there was a slight bump and a squishy, slicey sort of noise from beneath them. Camilla looked behind her and, to her utter horror, she saw that they had just run over four of the Queen’s Corgis. The combine harvester had sliced up the poor creatures and strewn their body parts all over the field.

Prince Charles panicked. There was enough trouble in the household already and he didn’t want what happened with Prince Andrew and Megan to happen to them too.

Prince Charles says to Camilla, “Hurry. Help me pick up all the bits. Stuff them randomly in the bushes and such. We can say foxes got them.”.

When they had set about collecting all the body parts, Prince Charles notices something shiny in a nearby bush. It is a Magic Lantern.

He gives the Magic Lantern a rub and, lo, out pops a Genie.

“It’s my day off,”, says the Genie, “but seeing as it is you, Prince Charles, I will grant you just ONE wish”.

“Oh, thank the stars!” exclaims Prince Charles, “I wish you to repair the Corgis and restore them to life.”

The Genie, looking concerned, says to Charles “Sadly, bringing your poor Corgis back into a fit state and reviving them is beyond my power. I regret that there are some things that even the most powerful of genies cannot do. ”.

So Charles resigns himself to losing the Queen’s Corgis, but then he remembers that he still has that one wish.

“Alright then,” say Prince Charles, “If you can’t revived the Corgis, then I wish you to make Camilla beautiful and desirable to all men!”

The Genie says “Hmm. About those Corgis…”

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So true.....

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@jakedduck1

Its just a joke ladies, don’t get your tails in a knot.

A Doctor was addressing a large audience. "The material we put into our stomachs is enough to have killed most of us sitting here, years ago.

Red meat is awful. Soft drinks corrode your stomach lining. Chinese food is loaded with MSG. High fat diets can be disastrous, and none of us realizes the long-term harm caused by the germs in our drinking water. But there is one thing that is the most dangerous of all and we all have, or will, eat it. Can anyone here tell me what food it is that causes the most grief and suffering for years after eating it?"

After several seconds of quiet, a 75-year-old man in the front row raised his hand, and softly said, "Wedding Cake."

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@jakedduck1

And a woman replied “That’s just what I was going to say!”

FL Mary

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This isn’t one of @jakedduck1 jokes, but the cutest thing happened this morning that brought a laugh and a smile.

For the past few months, my husband and I are living in a condo. The weather is beautiful, so while I’m on my laptop typing replies for Connect this morning, I have the balcony door open about 6 inches.
All of a sudden in my field of vision, I see this little bird strutting across the living room floor in front of me like he owns the place!! What the heck!! Hahahah A sparrow!   So I quickly get up to open the patio door all the way thinking maybe he’ll fly back out and then quietly walk back to where I saw him heading!! 
Fearing a panicked bird, instead I find he's under the dining room table, nonchalantly picking crumbs off the floor!! 😂    So I carefully bent down and started talking to him, you know, "Hey little birdee, what cha doin’? You really should go back outside.”
He looked at me, but obviously not panicked, hopped onto a chair cushion, then up to the top of the chair, like he's going to have breakfast.  I laughed and then suggested he hustle on out.
 HE DID!! He hopped off the chair, walked back to the door then quietly exited the way he came in.  He's obviously no stranger to freeloading!! 😂😂 Now I regret not having him stay longer to finish the floor service. 😅

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